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Original poster

Lack of tummy time has impacted my baby

152 replies

knitting774 · 30/03/2021 10:09

My DS has always hated tummy time, crying whenever he was put on his front. Because of this I gave up trying and now, at 11 months, he’s behind on his gross motor skills.

I blame myself for not continuing the tummy time and picking him up when he got upset. I should have left him on his tummy to figure it all out and build up muscle strength, rather than giving in.

I’m so worried that he still can’t crawl or get into sitting position from lying down. I decided to really work on the tummy time and made myself do 20 minutes a day with him every day in March, but it hasn’t made a difference.

He will slide backwards on his tummy and slowly rotate around on his stomach, but can’t get on all fours.

I have to entertain him constantly whilst he’s on his tummy - he’s fine (just about) when being entertained but as soon as I stop he starts crying.

Is there anything else I could or should be doing? I’m at a loss and am feeling so anxious about it. I’m also beating myself up that I didn’t try harder from day 1.

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Original poster

knitting774 · 30/03/2021 23:29

Yes, he smiles and laughs a lot. If I don’t move toys to him he will just get frustrated and start to cry. Then what am I meant to do - I can’t just leave him crying on the floor.

Thanks for the paediatric physio suggestion though - I’m going to look into that. We have very little money but I fear the NHS could take months.

OP posts:

ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 30/03/2021 23:47

The only thing that worked for my son was lying on me, and I would lie on my back on the floor. Lots of eye contact and singing/talking.

I don't think really you can have caused any delay, babies are all different, and the next few months he will probably have a sudden burst. Don't panic!

daisypond · 30/03/2021 23:56

Seriously, I have never heard of tummy time. My DC were born around 2000.

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Ploughingthrough · 31/03/2021 00:01

Like I said below, have his hips checked out. If it's nothing then he is very very likely to be absolutely fine and developing at his own rate. Look at a the stories below there is a huge range of normal. You are ruining your day to day existence worrying about this, and blaming yourself which isnt healthy. You've got a lovely baby there you have to try and find a way of enjoying him. I hope you feel better after the 12 months check. They are all different.

Ploughingthrough · 31/03/2021 00:03

Also consider the absolute worst case scenario. He needs a bit if physio, or is a late Walker. Neither are a big deal in the grand scheme of things.
If anyone asks you at a group if he is walking you say 'not yet, I'm not concerned though'

MissMarks · 31/03/2021 00:10

I would see health visitor first. Where I am (NI), if any concerns next step would be a referral to the child development clinic.

samandpoppysmummy · 31/03/2021 00:46

My DD hated being on her tummy and I never made her do 'tummy time'. She was
the happiest, smiliest baby but very late meeting her physical milestones. She sat up unsupported for the first time at 9 months, crawled at 14 months, didn't bear weight on her legs until 18 months, stood up with support at 20 months and finally walked at 22 months. She was an early talker though - I used to put toys out of her reach on the sofa to try to encourage her to stand up and she'd just point at her brother and then the toy and say 'Sam get it' 😂 She was a very fat baby, as she loved her food but didn't move around to burn it off and I think her weight made it harder for her to pull herself up to standing.

DD is now 14 and an elite gymnast - the most super-fit, agile, strong and co-ordinated person imaginable and I'm in awe of her ability. And she's so slim, I think she's just grown upwards and not outwards ever since she started walking! I'm so glad I didn't worry about her when she was a baby. I just enjoyed her lovely, happy personality (which she still has) and let her do everything when she was ready, despite other people's frequent comments about how 'behind' she was.

My DS (17 months older than DD)) met his physical milestones at the 'right' times, but didn't really talk at all until he was three. He's a perfectly normal 15 year old boy now, with an excellent vocabulary and great debating skills :)

denverRegina · 31/03/2021 00:46

"Thanks for the paediatric physio suggestion though - I’m going to look into that. We have very little money but I fear the NHS could take months"

Please don't spend what little money you have on this. He's fine! He's a baby, just enjoy it.

mathanxiety · 31/03/2021 00:55

Try putting toys just an inch or two out of reach.

TheTeenageYears · 31/03/2021 01:37

DS crawled at 12 months and walked at 15 months. Don't remember consciously doing tummy time 20 years ago. Within a month of taking his first steps he could run, downhill whilst turning away and not looking where he was going, all without falling over. DD could stand up at 10 weeks, drag herself across the floor not long after, crawl at 6 months, walked at 11 months. She has never been anything like as stable on her feet as her brother. I wouldn't panic just yet OP.

Gemma2019 · 31/03/2021 01:41

Honestly, whatever happens please believe this is nothing to do with a lack of tummy time.

With my first two babies I did everything strictly by the book and literally turned them around all day like rotisserie chickens. I stopped bothering so much after the third, and it made no difference whatsoever.

Doona · 31/03/2021 01:52

Age of milestone achievement is deceptive. It's not important in itself. If he's cheerful, active, curious and responsive, for most of the day, he's doing great.

Lemonandlime123 · 31/03/2021 02:26

My eldest crawled for 1 week before she started walking at 13 months. Try not to worry OP, they all go at their own pace.

Lemonandlime123 · 31/03/2021 02:32

@knitting774

Yes, he smiles and laughs a lot. If I don’t move toys to him he will just get frustrated and start to cry. Then what am I meant to do - I can’t just leave him crying on the floor.

Thanks for the paediatric physio suggestion though - I’m going to look into that. We have very little money but I fear the NHS could take months.

Your HV should refer you OP if they think there is a problem.

1forAll74 · 31/03/2021 02:49

There never was such a term as tummy time years ago., all babies are different,and get into doing things at their own pace, perhaps stop thinking about the childs so called milestones in life.unless you are particularly worried about something.

arcof · 31/03/2021 04:53

As others have said, these days are precious and go by so fast. Have you thought that maybe your anxiety is an issue and seeing the doctor about it? I think perhaps you need to tackle that so you can get back to enjoying your baby.

Original poster

knitting774 · 31/03/2021 07:30

That’s so reassuring, thanks @samandpoppysmummy. And thanks to everyone else for taking the time to reply. I will update after the 12 month check.

OP posts:

Embracelife · 31/03/2021 08:53

@knitting774

Last time he was weighed at about 6 months old he was around the 70th.

I’ve been Googling and have scared myself silly with what has come up. What if it’s something serious?

I honestly don’t think I can cope with this worry any more.

if it is then you will get physio for him There will always be a solution. You will deal with it. With medical support.

Speak to your gp for some cbt sessions for you to learn how to manage your anxiety
If he has issues and you have no health professional saying so
If ..
Then you would get support
And life will still go on

Get your hv review set up.
If any issue they will refer on
Some kids have hypermobility and late walking like my dd who has no other issues but first walked age 24 months.
But your baby has not been diagnosed with anything

It is good to take any worry to hv or gp.
Ask them to review your child

ThornAmongstRoses · 31/03/2021 09:03

Please don’t blame yourself.

My second son hated tummy time and I very rarely put him on his front but he was still walking by 9 months.

My friend on the other hand was very rigid about tummy time but her son had to be referred to Physiotherapy when he was aged 10 months due to similar problems you describe with your son.

Whatever the reason behind your son being slower to develop these skills, I doubt it is anything to do with how much tummy time he had.

Kayjay2018 · 31/03/2021 09:21

@knitting774 I also have a little one the same age and with covid hadn't seen a HV since she was born. We had a letter and questionnaire come though at about 9.5 months from HV, with us to complete the assessment at home and then do a review with HV. As they had never met my daughter they were offering face to face (for mums with babies born March-May last year. Hopefully they will offer you this. Personally I would call the HV and explain your DS current abilities because it will either go 2 ways. 1. They will tel you not to worry and they will be in touch for 12 month check or 2. They will call you in and offer referrals if they are concerned. If you do this now you will be 1 month earlier than if you wait. Either way you will have a plan which will hopefully ease some of your anxiety

Melae · 31/03/2021 09:26

I’m not sure it is tummy time.... my son loved tummy time and rolled front to back early but didn’t crawl until 11 months nearly 12 months and only started walking a month ago he’s almost 17 months . At his 12 month review he was behind on gross motor as he couldnt cruise or stand up holding on the sofa for more than a second without dropping. My first born progressed even later with gross motor so I wasn’t too worried this time round.

Don’t be so hard on yourself he will get there

vickylou78 · 31/03/2021 12:08

Honestly don't panic!! 11 months is still tiny. Lots of children don't crawl. They just suddenly go straight to walking.

I'd advise just playing lots on the floor, helping them pull themselves up on sofa etc. Theyll be walking before you know it and you wonder what you were worried about. Ask Health visitor if you are still worried. But both my girls don't really crawl and didn't do any specific tummy time really but both walking by 12-14 months.

vickylou78 · 31/03/2021 12:15

@knitting774

I do blame myself massively. I thought it was enough just to put DS on his mat with his toys as I thought babies naturally figured these things out for themselves. How wrong I was.

Oh my gosh!! Expect He's totally fine! You've done what most parents do and they are all fine!

StrawberryCreamCake · 31/03/2021 12:25

You mentioned he is quite heavy. This could be part of it - that's not to say that he'll end up behind other children at all in the end, but maybe it is discouraging him from moving and supporting his own weight

Original poster

knitting774 · 31/03/2021 13:03

I actually just weighed him on my bathroom scales and he's just over 9.5kg - so I wouldn't say he's especially heavy for his age, more normal range?

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