Breast is best - no it’s not actually.

[bubblesforlife]

I’m a new mom, my baby was born last weekend.
I followed feeding guidelines, listened to professional advice, and decided to breast feed my baby.

A few days in, my baby has developed jaundice and low sodium. This is due to dehydration and no fluids.

I gave my Baby colostrum, by breast and syringe regularly.

I asked my visiting midwife if I should supplement feeding with formula until my milk came in, she said no I am doing the best by my baby. Not unless there is a clinical need.

Now we’re readmitted for 2 nights minimum and placed on as strict baby formula feeding plan.

2 other ladies in the ward also have dehydrated babies for the same reason as me. How does this happen all the time yet no one talks about it?

Breast is best? No. Starve your baby until your milk comes in, and then hope for the best that you’re on for the lucky ones it works for.

My milk came in on day 3, a normal timeline.!

The messaging is wrong to mothers. This is so very common according to hospital.

Breast is best..... eventually.... but feed your baby what it needs, if that’s a supplement of formula, so what.

I don’t know what I’m trying to say, but I’m just so upset. No one told me I was starving my little newborn. I did my best, I tried so hard and sat there filling syringes of colostrum.

Something has to change here. The pressure placed on new mothers throughout pregnancy to breast feed is wrong.

I hope my baby recovers soon so we can go home and be a family.

@Breastisnotalwaysbest but I am saying in my very first statement, if there is a medical need ALWAYS formula feed.

This clearly is a medical need?

Sorry this happened to you, OP, but that's not the norm with breastfeeding.

When I had my child, I was actually pressured to use formula by the midwives who didn't want the hassle of trying different ways to help me breastfeed, to the point they left me in tears. I persevered and my milk came in on day 3 as well but my baby was absolutely fine and gained lots of weight quickly. They do not starve on colostrum.

Women should do what they feel is best for their babies and not pressured either way, but in the UK at least, all the pressure is to formula feed, in my experience. I am still breastfeeding my 2 year old but I can never tell anyone because once my child was 6 months+, other mothers seemed to get annoyed that I chose to do this... probably out of some strange guilt that they didn't.

Be confident in your choices. You know what is best for you and your child.

If children with pku are fed breast milk and subsequently on weaning a normal diet with normal amounts of protein, they will be impaired in various ways.

[quote cheesebubble]@Breastisnotalwaysbest but I am saying in my very first statement, if there is a medical need ALWAYS formula feed.

This clearly is a medical need? [/quote]
You statement was “if the baby is getting dehydrated and there is a medical need”. Not or. And.

Perhaps you meant “or if there is a medical need”?

Similar thing happened here, I made the (at the time) very difficult decision to stop breastfeeding all together. DS had reflux (we didn't know this at the time) and I'm confident that played a big part in our feeding difficulties. I then developed severe PND and not being able to do what was "best" for my baby was the main driving force. Breastfeeding is great if it works for everyone and it's what you want to do. Formula feeding is also great if that's what works for everyone and that's what you want to do.

Personal choice. If you don’t want to breast feed to say baby is to be on formula. Done and dusted

[quote Countdowntonothing]@breastisnotalwaysbest

PKU is a genetic disorder. It's not caused by breastfeeding. That's like saying strawberries can kill you because a few people have an allergy to strawberries. [/quote]
Please point out where I said PKU was caused by breastfeeding?

I didn’t say that at all.

@ParadiseIsland perhaps not. But I don't just mean latch as that isn't everything. I'm not a breastfeeding supporter myself so I don't know offhand the range of options which could be explored in that situation, but I am interested in breastfeeding support because I think it's so appalling in the UK and I follow a few people who write about it. There are lots of things which can be looked at, adjusted, tried, and yes of course sometimes formula is a reasonable intervention, my milk didn't come in until day 6 with DC2 and clearly he had to drink something. Even in that situation though, it's hardly ever discussed whether the mum wants to use formula as a temporary tool or permanently bottle feed/combo feed. I've never even heard of that conversation taking place with a UK HCP, it's just get them on formula ASAP and then she's left to it again. No support for tapering down the top ups, expressing to supply breast milk for the top ups, increasing supply, or managing mum's risk of mastitis if she decides to stop.

The way it's handled here is often like the op found - ooh no, no formula, then suddenly oh yes this baby needs formula ASAP as it's an emergency. Babies shouldn't be left that long and mums shouldn't be ignored until it's the only solution, and definitely shouldn't be made to feel bad having got to that point!

How can you try other things if you don't know what those other things are or that they even exist, let alone how to do them?

Op congrats on the birth of your little girl I'm sorry that you have ended up back in hospital and i hope she's better soon and you can bring her home. Fed is absolutely best be that breast milk or formula, and i say that as someone who exclusively bf 3 out of 4. With my first baby i had a ecs and was very unwell with high blood pressure i tried my best to feed and had so much trouble getting her to latch, they kept pressuring me to stick with it, i was exhausted and emotional and desperately tryiny with little help. They didnt heed me when i said she was constantly sleepy and should i give formula insisting i stick with it and lo and behold she ended up in scbu with jaundice,i did end up formula feeding in the end because it was best for us both and she is now a beautiful healthy 10 year old. With my second i had to go away for a few days to get her off the breast at 20 months! There is no right or wrong in this every baby and every situation is different and mothers need to do whats best for them and their babies whether that be breast or formula. Op you sound like you are an already fab mother dont doubt yourself and dont listen to any unkind responses, wishing you and your little girl all the best. X

I'm lactose intolerant and was ill the entire time my mum breast fed me. Breast isn't best for every baby.

"We need to stop judging those that formula feed - you can’t even get Tesco club card points on it. You can’t buy formula on the pay £40 and get £10 off vouchers in supermarkets as it is in the same category as cigarettes".

That is appalling. I’m sick of the guilt that is piled upon new mums for just trying to feed their baby, it makes me so angry!

OP what happened to you isn't normal and breastfeeding is the optimal way to feed.

All a baby needs until milk comes in on day 3/4 is colostrum. Nature is clever and it's not going to give us a faulty system.

Imagine if somebody started a thread entitled "the pancreas is best - no it's not" because they were diabetic and suggested that awareness should be raised and we should all start supplementing ourselves with insulin

op, you have my sympathy. Nine years ago, I was in a similar situation. I desperately struggled to breastfeed but my ds lost a lot of weight and at the weekly post birth check we were sent to the ward while they checked him over. I was told I couldn't leave (my toddler was at home with my parents) despite me saying I knew how to formula feed (ds1 had been formula fed due to other issues) and would now do so. No breastfeeding support was offered, no staff explained what was going on and it actually felt like they were accusing me of abuse! It was so distressing. I was eventually allowed to leave at 8 pm having arrived at 10.30 that morning. It still makes me SO angry.
Fed is best and I hope it goes well for you from now on. My ds's are now 13 and 9 and absolutely fine

And incidentally OP, my DS has been formula fed from birth. A cousin and three friends all had babies at a similar time and all EBF. DS is the only one of the five never to have had a cold or cough!

@freddiesmoustache

OP what happened to you isn't normal and breastfeeding is the optimal way to feed.

All a baby needs until milk comes in on day 3/4 is colostrum. Nature is clever and it's not going to give us a faulty system.

Imagine if somebody started a thread entitled "the pancreas is best - no it's not" because they were diabetic and suggested that awareness should be raised and we should all start supplementing ourselves with insulin

Hardly the same, and the OP isn't alone in what happened with her baby. It's opinions like this that can cause all sorts of issues with guilt etc in new mums and they really don't need it!

I agree with @cheesebubble.

You said it yourself OP, that the midwife said not unless it's clinically necessary.

When it is clinically necessary, that's when it's advised to introduce formula.

What did fail to happen was the correct assessment about when it became clinically necessary, and unfortunately midwives in this instance are the medical lead who should have assessed this.

They're woefully undertrained about breastfeeding issues though which is why some hospitals have a dedicated infant feeding team to fill that knowledge gap.

This isn't about breast, formula or fed is best. It's about lobbying for the correct community care to ensure that no mum feels guilty for her feeding choices whether it's something she was planning to do, or whether it's something that's been medically advised.

@DoTheNextRightThing

I'm lactose intolerant and was ill the entire time my mum breast fed me. Breast isn't best for every baby.

But normal formula milk contains lactose so would have caused the same. If she was able to find out that you were lactose intolerant and feed the correct formula she could equally have cut lactose out of her diet so she could BF. I think it's extremely rare for BF to be the problem, I think it's the support, information and understanding of all possible issues surrounding BFing that is generally the issue.

@reallyisthisallthereis

If breast feeding is that important for long term health, there would be a question on insurance health forms for adults!

Very good point! My eldest was BF for 6 months and my second for 3 months, both of which I thought was a good long time at that time, and my third for about one week. All doing really well as adults, intelligent and healthy. No one talks about BF/FF amongst my mum-peers now, it's just one of those things people get het up about at the time, which is of course a very emotional time when things get blown up out of proportion. So shoot me now, I couldn't care less!

I agree with you OP, I'm very passionate about breast milk and it's benefits but it doesn't always work out for a multitude of reasons. Thank god there's formula, before it was invented people who couldn't breastfeed or find someone to do it for them often lost their children.

Sadly the NHS have decided to focus solely on breastfeeding and seem to largely ignore the fact that some people can't do it and also that they need to actually provide some support.

Congratulations on your baby

I think the human race would have died out of breast milk or colostrum wasn’t enough to keep a baby alive. It’s stomach is the size of a thimble- literally.

This is so ignorant - it’s not about the human race surviving, it’s about individual babies getting what they need. In the past babies would have suffered and died because they were not able to breastfeed - women around the world now still have to top up their babies with water and animal milk which of course isn’t safe or give their children to other women to breastfeed if they can’t produce enough milk. Formula is an amazing invention.

My theory: governments invest a lot of money into encouraging breastfeeding because it would be expensive as hell to subsidise tons and tons of formula for the many people who struggle to afford it.

When a baby gets to six months and starts on solids, you don’t see huge guilt tripping of mums who feed their baby food from jars and pouches, even though it’s probably not as healthy as a diet of home cooked meals made from scratch every day.

Of course breast is best...that’s what they are intended to eat. Formula should be for emergency needs only. It’s only in lazy humans that we try to argue for avoiding doing the female feeding role. Not a popular opinion, I know, but if babies were meant to be formula fed we wouldn’t produce milk.

“Nature is clever and it's not going to give us a faulty system.”

Right. So by that logic, I guess those of us with less than perfect eyesight shouldn’t need to rely on glasses?

OP - my son was hospitalised at 7 weeks with a congenital heart defect. I befriended another mum in the hospital who had a son in too (same age) for renal failure/potential brain damage. All from the pressure she received from her HV to keep on bf’ing, formula not necessary etc. (despite mum expressing concerns). The baby was way beyond dehydration to the point his life was at risk. An extreme example, I’m sure, but I was absolutely appalled it came to that. Just listen to the mum and give the baby FFS. Negligence from the HV in my eyes.

(And honestly, having your baby in hospital gives you a massive dose of perspective. I had to stop bf’ing when he was admitted and he was on a special formula for ages. He’s a fab 3 year old, and I put it to the “Breast is best” camp about how he’d be any better right now).

Fed isn't 'best' 🙄 Fed is the bare minimum required. Breast feeding has by the far the most benefits to Mum and baby and formula is there as a substitute for the tiny amount of people that genuinely cannot breastfeed (I'm sure it's like 0.1% of the population).

People do have a choice but it should be informed and if that feels like 'pressure' to breastfeed then that's just how it is! If everyone breastfed it would help longer term with NHS resources so why shouldn't it be promoted.

The rate for successful breastfeeding is so low - if only it had the marketing budgets and influence etc that formula companies have!