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Parenting

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Housekeeper COVID safety

99 replies

TravellingSmartMum · 30/08/2020 23:25

Hi - today I am really fuming . Our housekeeper who has a sweet spot for my three year old daughter came into our apartment (she has her own set of keys), picked her up (we never sanctioned this and she didn’t wash hands to add) and started kissing her a dozen times on the face. I immediately came out of the kitchen where I was making my child’s meal and took my child away. She called for my child again and did the same thing and I took my child away. This time both me and my husband spoke to the housekeeper saying how unsafe she was with doing this and we didn’t approve, and were actually angry. I am still very angry and think she’s a liability and should be fired. If she is this callous who knows what else she is doing that is wreck less in this pandemic? After all she does clean multiple households. I asked her to leave her keys today which she ‘forgot to do’ and then she texted to ask if I was upset. I was very frank with her about how upset I was and how my child’s safety surpasses anything. How could she infringe like this on my child being an adult and understanding the severity of what’s happening ? Also before leaving today (post us confronting her about what she did) she still had the nerve to ask me to leave her a good review for cleaning to her agency . It added more wood to the fire. I spoke to her agency and told them everything, from which they were in shock. I also said she doesn’t routinely wear masks while cleaning in our house which also we question and they stated it’s their protocol that all cleaners have to wear masks 100% of the time. They said she would be kept off assignments (and most likely fired) and she would provide for our keys. I feel so frustrated and upset that this happened on my watch (that I didn’t tell them how callous she was about masks from before and most of all I didn’t yell more at her and tell her to get out immediately after she kissed my daughter) but you just don’t expect someone to behave this way let alone in your own home 😕. Just wanted to know what others would do and please without judgement . We are being hard on ourselves as is. I really don’t think she deserves a second chance because she should just know better — and most of all I lost my trust in her coming into my home. I’ve also asked the agency to get her to do a covid test ASAP as the responsibility was on them for putting her risky behaviour into our home. Most likely they will fire her and I don’t feel bad or sympathy but feels she deserves this for what she did. Is that very unempathetic on my part?

What I really also don’t understand is that she realised how I took my child away from her and my husband also starting telling my child to come back - yet she called for my child a second time and did the same thing. As if to test our reaction , she’s a mother as well of two grown children and for her not to read any of these signals and repeat it is beyond clueless and a liability for her work.

OP posts:
LouiseTrees · 30/08/2020 23:27

I’m with you on this

SylvanianFrenemies · 30/08/2020 23:28

I think you have massively overreacted.

I say this as someone who is very concerned about Covid-19.

TravellingSmartMum · 30/08/2020 23:31

I think my child’s safety comes first. She didn’t wash her hands and took my child to kiss them deeply several times in two instances. I don’t know which health professional would say this is safe behaviour ?

OP posts:

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bluebell34567 · 30/08/2020 23:31

for months its been said to keep distance and she is ignoring. its very strange behaviour especially to a child.
you are right to sack her.
find a new one, move on.

TravellingSmartMum · 30/08/2020 23:36

@LouiseTrees

I’m with you on this
Thank you. I’ve been giving myself a bit of a hard time for not acting faster and blaming myself. My husband is doing the same. But this behaviour is so unpredictable either in this time or not. No one has the right to touch anyone’s children, period: especially in this way.
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SylvanianFrenemies · 30/08/2020 23:42

It is one thing to not want her back, another to get her sacked altogether.

TravellingSmartMum · 30/08/2020 23:42

@SylvanianFrenemies

I think you have massively overreacted.

I say this as someone who is very concerned about Covid-19.

Several of my friends are physicians and they found this behaviour highly risky and troublesome. They recommended we ask the agency to get her tested.
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TravellingSmartMum · 30/08/2020 23:47

@SylvanianFrenemies

It is one thing to not want her back, another to get her sacked altogether.
I just reported to the agency what she did with regards to endangering my child as well as not following their mask protocol (they told me it is a rule that all their cleaners wear masks 100% while working). She rarely did this and they were extremely upset when I told them. I feel the onus is on her deciding not to follow protocol and being a big liability that will get her sacked and not by me reporting the truth of the matter - as she’s violated our rights and she should be accountable whatever they decide.
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JM10 · 30/08/2020 23:55

I think it's a massive overreaction.

However, what does she actually do for you, because if my cleaner cane in and started kissing my daughter I'd find it very weird. If it was someone who spent a significant amount of time in our house, so had built up a relationship with her, maybe not.

Couldn't you have just said you weren't comfortable with her behaviour and would prefer to social distance?

Mintjulia · 30/08/2020 23:56

If you aren't happy with her behaviour in your home then you are right to ask her to leave, and to report your concerns to the agency.

But as for getting her fired from the agency, that is not your business. It is up to the agency who they employ.

RaininSummer · 30/08/2020 23:56

Sounds quite inappropriate even without the Covid factor.

LittleBearPad · 31/08/2020 00:01

I think you’ve overreacted.

Fine to request a different cleaner going forward but you don’t need to get her fired.

Pipandmum · 31/08/2020 00:08

Did you tell her firmly that you did not want her touching your child the first time? Did this happen today? Surprised an agency cleaner works on a Sunday.
You have reported her and she is likely to be fired. What more do you want?

TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 00:13

@LittleBearPad

I think you’ve overreacted.

Fine to request a different cleaner going forward but you don’t need to get her fired.

So you think I shouldn’t have told the agency the truth of her behaviour towards my three year old daughter and never wearing masks ? Honestly for the mask part we always stay in other parts of the house usually when she cleans so it never hit me but when I spoke to customer service and they asked about her and masks why should I lie for her ? They said it was their mandate for all cleaners working for them to wear masks and they have given them training on covid protocols .
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TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 00:14

@Pipandmum

Did you tell her firmly that you did not want her touching your child the first time? Did this happen today? Surprised an agency cleaner works on a Sunday. You have reported her and she is likely to be fired. What more do you want?
I grabbed my child from her arms and my husband yelled that’s enough. You would think someone would understand and not do this for a second time
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TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 00:15

@Mintjulia

If you aren't happy with her behaviour in your home then you are right to ask her to leave, and to report your concerns to the agency.

But as for getting her fired from the agency, that is not your business. It is up to the agency who they employ.

Agreed. I am just telling them what happened in our home. It’s their discretion to decide what to do about it
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TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 00:21

@JM10

I think it's a massive overreaction.

However, what does she actually do for you, because if my cleaner cane in and started kissing my daughter I'd find it very weird. If it was someone who spent a significant amount of time in our house, so had built up a relationship with her, maybe not.

Couldn't you have just said you weren't comfortable with her behaviour and would prefer to social distance?

She literally is our cleaner. We have a Woman who is our child’s nanny . Even our nanny would never be this touchy and kissy with our child (it was highly inappropriate and not even close family would behave this way. The kissing kept happening to the point my husband yelled the first time it happened and I took my child away from her). Yet she did it again as if she was testing us or I don’t know what? My maternal instinct just kicked in and said this is it , this person is never allowed in my home when it happened.
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seayork2020 · 31/08/2020 00:28

Would it not be safer not to have any staff and do the work yourself?

TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 00:51

@seayork2020

Would it not be safer not to have any staff and do the work yourself?
Yes it would be. Unfortunately both my husband and I have very demanding work and we really appreciate the help. However getting someone to do this work shouldn’t come with the caveat they will do whatever they want, not follow covid protocol and act overall unprofessional .
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TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 01:06

@Pipandmum

Did you tell her firmly that you did not want her touching your child the first time? Did this happen today? Surprised an agency cleaner works on a Sunday. You have reported her and she is likely to be fired. What more do you want?
Also why would I firmly tell the cleaner not to touch my child ? She is not the child’s nanny so there should really be no intersection with my child except a hello at most. I don’t have to tell the plumber , the postal worker or the dog walker not to touch my kid, or kiss my child - why would I need to say this to the cleaner??
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BananaPop2020 · 31/08/2020 01:08

You are very much over-reacting.

TravellingSmartMum · 31/08/2020 01:11

@BananaPop2020

You are very much over-reacting.
To each parent there own. However I do feel she encroached on my child and was a health risk . My doctor friends also agreed and were perplexed by the irresponsible behaviour she exhibited (as well as her own agency).
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Letsallscreamatthesistene · 31/08/2020 01:13

Its unprofessional behaviour, but to get her fired is appalling.

You could have played this differently by saying something like, 'im not comfortable with how close you are to my daughter, more so now due to COVID. Id also like you to wear a mask to clean our apartment. If not, ill tell the agency due to health and safety'. Or something to that effect. That probably would have got you what you wanted, and the woman would have kept her job. Hindsight is a great thing, but you over reacted.

BananaPop2020 · 31/08/2020 01:15

OP- Why exactly are you posting this? For validation?

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 31/08/2020 01:15

Please stop justifying your reaction because of your Dr friends thoughts.