Proud to have breast fed

[Keepdlingwhatyourgutsays]

I will start off by saying I don't care if you bf or ff. I see so many posts where women say they ff but none on bf. they get taken down or people straight away think it's a dig. Honestly what ever you chose to do you do.

However after so many negative and nasty comments when I was breastfeeding I can say I did it. I didn't give in to the people who were nasty I didn't let them bully me into stopping. I was a younger mum not young young but I was young and I was still very insecure about a lot of things and I did not feel supportive.
I do remember once the first time I breastfed on the bus I did that thing where I assumed everyone would be staring and one elder gentlemen was and he just grinned a very kind grin and that kept me going through some of the nasty comments.
If you are breast feeding and getting comments from family or friends please ignore it because looking back they were just insecure (not everyone but the ones I New) or they are just plain nasty. Anyone who makes a nasty comment about that isn't nice nor needed.
But remember wether you breastfeed or bottle it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Online people get so angry about it but it really doesn't matter guys

I breasted 2 babies for 18 months each. No negative comments whatsoever with either of them. Am I proud of myself for doing it? Not really. They’re 8 and 6 now and you cannot tell which of their peers was breastfed and which weren’t. They were both shit sleepers and utter Velcro babies. Wouldn’t take dummies. Wouldn’t accept cuddles from anyone but me. I think I made a rod for my own back TBH. Baby number 3 will be on the Cow & Gate.

I’d be proud of pumping for 3 months. I don’t think anyone thinks they're special for breastfeeding. But saying you’re proud of it is totally valid. I’m proud of the trialthlons I’ve completed, I don’t think I’m special, Im lucky I have a fully functioning body that I put to use to achieve something I wanted, although it’s essentially pointless, It was a challenge. So was breastfeeding. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a little bit of pride at the thought my dd grew from a tiny premie to a bouncy healthy baby just from my body and my hard work.

@greeneyedgoose I hope yourve not let yourself get to annoyed. It clearly was not the intention. Well done though 😀 You did great.
If you take the time to read yourll see that it's been positive for many people though.

@grandmaswagsbag wow. Don't people often struggle to feed when babies are premature. I've heard because of the stress and milk not being produced as they were so soon. I'd be proud if I were you really proud

@Bix I loved that. People used to they'll be clingy she'll be so dependant as she's older. They couldn't be more wrong (they wouldn't admit it though). I treasure those memories good on you for doing what you want though 😀

@EventNotInData People who slimmed down are encouraged to feel proud even though there are others who couldn't do the same. People who ran a marathon are encouraged to feel proud even though there are others who couldn't do the same. But mothers who feel proud for managing to breastfeed in face of obstacles they faced are told to shut up and just get on with it.

Bix, it's likely to just be their personalities. Both my boys are good sleepers (well, from about 10 to 12 months onwards), and not at all clingy. They're 5 and nearly 2 now, both breastfed for 18 months or more.

Not that it matters if you'd rather formula feed anyway of course. I'm just not convinced that feeding method has a huge impact on things like sleep or clinginess.

She wasn’t really premie, 35 weeks, but tiny at first. Yes it was hard to get it established. Lots of pumping and waiting until she could get the hang of it. It’s possible, my friend fed her daughter who was born at 30 weeks! But honestly I’ve never needed so much grit and determination in that first week of pumping. So yes I’m proud and nothing and no one will take that away from me!

@bisquick earlier in the thread.

Exactly this!!!! Best response I’ve read on this topic I think. Definitely, it’s the moral gloss that’s annoying and causes the divide.

Breastfed all mine. Ist son fed until I was 6 months pregnant with 2nd son and he was 2 1/2 by then so I stopped to give myself a break.

I had a few nasty comments but come from a long line of breast feeders and got so much support from my wonderful mum especially.

My MIL was very disapproving as she wanted to give my PFB a bottle so she kept making comments about how my husband wouldn't bond with the baby if he couldn't feed him and sending me off to the other room when I needed to feed the baby.

All seems really silly now he's a happy healthy 16 year old but was important at the time.

slane, unfortunatly the problem lies with the person glossing. I've written this for people who breastfeed and yourve come on and glossed it and now you have a problem with it being glossed. No offence given no glossing from us. If you choose to gloss and taken offence I can't help.
I'm now here to do what I set out and read all the different stories from the mums dads who have read this how intended
@grandmaswagsbag I'm just amazed. I felt pathetic after an easy pregnancy easy birth to not even be able to latch and then mums like yourself and friend just doing it.

Busy boys mum this upsets me. When will people get you can bond without feeding a baby. For the first few years they may well cling to mum more but as they get older they branch out.
What is actually wrong with them clinging to mum abit more. Is this not how the natural world do it (waiting for smart ass to name a seahorse) the nagority of animals do it.
I was so close to small one when she's was breast feeding and I loved it my partner did to to watch how much and how safe his little one was in my arms filled his heart (I no that's cringe and lovey).
I wish more people could be open about and talk about breastfeeding so we could talk about these things and comments. I totally felt it was just me getting them. Really opening my eyes people so honest

@raisinglittlens I will give it a read thank you 🤗

And thank you to mums net for keeping this thread open if you are reading I hope you can see it is helping and in no way trying to be a competition for which feed is better or putting other methods of feeding down.

I genuinely don't know why I do this to myself. I tried for 5 weeks and had to stop, my baby couldn't latch no matter how much help we got, I was in so much pain then developed mastitis. My mental health was so fragile I had to stop. I still feel sad sometimes I didn't manage (I wanted to). On the flip side, my little boy absolutely thrives on formula and he changed into a totally different, happier baby once I made the switch. Obviously this is just my experience. I'm a huge believer in fed is best. There is so much competition out there between mums, it's so sad. I'm happy to see the barriers between ff and bf slowly being broken down. Ultimately all we want is a happy, content full baby and luckily formula and breast milk can achieve this.

Op why did you feel “ pathetic” when your baby wouldn’t latch on? That’s not a nice way to feel after you’ve given birth, at all. No woman should feel like that.

It would be nice if this thread could be left for women who have got positive stories about breast feeding or hurdles overcome. As a supportive thread. That would be nice.

Because your breasts are there to feed a baby and mine were big and full and I couldn't do it. I'd also just had a baby so the hormones everywhere didn't help me feel any different.

Busy boys mums yes it would. There are alternative threads for ff mums and dads to talk to people who have been through similar experiences 😀 I really only started this as I never find ones for breast feeding ones they are nice and not over run by bad comments. If there are any they often get taken down. Again no offence meant to anyone but yes I agree do what you want let's be able to talk about bf like we do ff with out the comments online especially

Wooooooo so glad you've made this thread. I too loved breastfeeding and am very proud of myself as others should be too. It's hard but we haven't given up because we know it's best for baby and dare I say o enjoyed it too. Breast is best and milk is for babies species specific!

Everything to do with mums seems so pro formula and anti breastfeeding. Ie. It's weird to go on after 6 months and we shouldn't be 'shoving it in people's faces'. Fuck that. Yes I am proud and yes I acknowledge that a very small percent of people can't do it but there should be much more support instead of yes it's hard I agree- give up- I did and I find it so much easier now. That's such a crap message to give out. Breast IS best. Altered cows milk/soy milk was not intended for human babies and should be used as a medicine not a commodity.

It’s a great thread OP, you should also be proud of the supportive comments and positive stories you’ve encouraged here!
When my daughter was little I was asked to go to some local primaries to breastfeed in classes and let the children see as most children had never seen breastfeeding.
It was really lovely. The kids asked such great questions and dd loved being centre of attention. It was sad for me to realise that BF was something alien to these kids which in turn influences their feeding choices when they are older. Yes FF is a totally valid choice but the information about both should be there. Perhaps that’s why there seems to be a “push” of BF info for pregnant women? To try to balance out the normalisation of bottle feeding that has been drip fed throughout a lifetime- bottles sold with all baby dolls, formula milk seen every time you shop, bottle feeding paraphernalia seen in films and tv programmes and friends and family FF... by the time a woman is expecting her first child it is far more likely she has been unconsciously primed to FF so maybe needs that info about Bfing to be able to make an informed choice.
It’s a shame that the benefits of BFing seem to be so quickly dismissed in the urge to support FF. the savings to the NHS if more people BF for instance is a significant one, and the future protective benefits of mother and child of lower cancer risks is also another one. When people dismiss it as not really all that different long term that’s a shame.
My oldest daughter is expecting a baby and is really quite young. I’m very pleased she is keen to BF and I hope she manages it. The relationship with your baby is always a special one, and I dont think I’d have had the same bond with mine had I not managed to BF.

That makes me happy to read. I'm so glad this page got kept on and not over run by negatives.
There needs to be a space to talk about it. Like a lady said earlier she couldn't talk to her friends because people say just ff or they et insecure about there choice. Which isn't what we set out to do we just need support when things get a bit tough sometimes.
I wish your daughter all the best

Isadora that’s so nice that the school did that. I remember one of my young relatives asking if they could feed my newborn when they came to visit look of utter confusion when I said she’s breastfeeding. I will just say that after the initial hurdle I absolutely loved breastfeeding and it’s one of my favourite memories from dds babyhood, felt that didn’t come across in my other posts! And you certainly shouldn’t feel pathetic OP, it can be equally hard to establish b/f with a full term baby. Compared to lots of people I know who’s babies had tounge tie etc I actually had a pretty easy ride, and I was lucky as I was in hospital with support on tap and a hospital grade pump. If I’d been discharged after a day I honestly don’t think I would have managed it.