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Parenting

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Original poster

Hands up those with a 2and a half plus still in nappies

101 replies

yawningmonster · 27/03/2007 04:59

Getting pressure from childminder, mil and friends to train ds who is no where near ready and is in fact kind of scared of the toilet and potty. I am not stressed and have told them there are plenty of children not trained at his age and he will do it when ready...so say they "where are these children, I've never come accross one training this late, you'll miss your chance and he won't train until he is at school and be ridiculed!!!" so back me up here who has a child over 2 and a half wtill in nappies please sign in here.....

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Othersideofthechannel · 27/03/2007 05:59

I know what you mean. Assume your DS is 2 and a half. This is too early for some boys. You're right not to turn it into a battle.
DS is 4 and was in nappies this time last year. He wouldn't sit on the toilet or potty for me. I don't think he was scared, just not ready and busy doing other things. Would sit on it for his gran but only if she read stories and any wees were purely coincidental (usually happened when he'd been sitting on there for about 20 mins!).
I stopped trying in Nov 05 when he was 2.8 and in June 06 when the weather got better starting leaving him bare bottomed in the garden. He did one wee next to the sand pit and I told him, next time do it against that tree. Once he'd got the hang of that, I showed him how he could do it standing up in the toilet. Only had a couple of accidents over the next few days and sincerely believe he wasn't ready before then. He was 3.4 when he toilet trained. I expect we'll be in night time nappies for a while yet as he wets the bed through a nappy at least every other night.

SittingBull · 27/03/2007 06:13

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RubberDuck · 27/03/2007 06:15

Well ds2 is nearly 3 and still in nappies. We tried potty training back in November and it just wasn't happening. He then got a couple of stomach bugs in succession and put any progress so far back we abandoned the exercise with the intention of potty training in the Easter holidays.

Now the Easter holidays are approaching and I still won't be potty training because we've got the house on the market! So delaying again. Think he'll be 3 and a half before we get round to it at this rate!

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Jelley · 27/03/2007 06:49

Just to balance out the sexes a bit, both dds were over 3 before they were ready. DS is only just 1, but I won't consider trying until he is at least three with our family history.

KristinaM · 27/03/2007 07:10

i have a ds 2 years 10 months. he has no interest whatsoever in potty training. his sister was teh same. She just announced " I am going to wear pants now" 3 weeks befroe her third birthday, whih she did! She was also very late ( 5) to be dry at night.

personally I dont worry as i am very lazy and find changing nappies at 7am easier than changing beds at 2am

tell MIL to take a hike

eidsvold · 27/03/2007 07:29

i have a 4 1/2 yo still in nappies ( she has sn BUT we are not making a concerted effort at present to toilet train her) I also have a 2 1/2 still in nappies - again she is showing no interest in the toilet, potty or being toilet trained. I also have a newborn - so three in nappies at present.

With my older two - I am leaving it until later in the year and if they show some interest and willingness then we'll go ahead.

Original poster

yawningmonster · 27/03/2007 08:46

Thank you thank you, mil came around with undies as a pressie for ds which he very politely said no thank you to. She then said to me "I think maybe it's you that is not ready don't you" arggghhh.

OP posts:

PizPizPiz · 27/03/2007 11:47

You are definitely not alone ! We've just spent THE potty training week end from hell and she's now back into nappies. Will try again in a couple of months but really not looking forward to it

NeuroticMum · 27/03/2007 18:44

You're definately not alone, my ds is 2 and a half and still in nappies. I tried to potty train him a couple of months ago but he just wasn't ready. I must admit that I'm totally freaked out at the thought of potty training but am going to try again in the summer when he can run about bare bottomed. Tell your mil to keep her nose out, you know your ds better than anyone

Othersideofthechannel · 27/03/2007 19:24

Wow, pizpiz, I'm impressed you managed to keep it up for a week. My attempts only lasted two days!

bEllieK · 27/03/2007 19:26

another one here!

ds was finally dry about 2 weeks after his 3rd birthday

fuzzywuzzy · 27/03/2007 19:29

DD2 although clean (she asks for the toilet when she needs to poo), is still in nappies, nowhere near dry yet. Utterly refuse to get upset and hysterical over this, am rather surprised she's clean at this age tbh, dd1 refused to use the toilet till well after her third birthday.

Of course my mother insists we were all clean and dry by nine months...she does you know she's mad, or we were rather amazing babies

LilyLoo · 27/03/2007 19:30

Completely agree. DS was anightmare to train. I know now that it was too soon and he wasn't ready. I took well meaning advice from others too ! It was terrible and put me off doing it again with dd 2.3 but she seemed much more ready telling me she wanted wee, happy to sit on potty etc. I tried and has been a massive sucess she fully trained after a week. Don't rush him he will let you know when he is ready.

Rantum · 27/03/2007 19:34

My ds is 2yrs 3 mths and I have not intention of even trying before he is 2 and half - 3 despite everyone (other Mums with similar aged dc's especially)constantly asking if I have started yet.

Hearing the MN experiences has helped to strengthen my resolve (which my MIL is actually on my side over - for once, she said "you want to make sure that you are training your child when he is ready, doing it too early is Mummy training not child training" I was shocked, but pleased!)

raspberryberet · 27/03/2007 19:40

Both of mine (one boy, one girl) were almost 3 before they were dry in the day. Dd is 6 and still in nappies at night time.

There isn't one "chance" that if you miss means he'll still be in nappies when he's at school. The right time is when he's ready, not when someone else thinks he should be.

The fact that he's scared of the potty would be big enough reason for me not to force the issue.

Charleesunnysunsun · 27/03/2007 19:54

DS is 2.6 and shows no sign of wanting to potty train, he has done 2 poos on the potty but only becuase i happened to judge when he was gong and made him sit on it!
Were waiting until he is showing some sign, although he is beging to hate being in a dirty nappy which never used to bother him and he knows when he needs to go so he is making some progress.

TheArmadillo · 27/03/2007 20:01

not quite - ds is 2.5 and showing no signs whatever of being ready.

My mum is insistant we were trained from birth practically (ok a little exaggeration there )

She tried to train him last summer, and now he is terrified of the toilet and potty .

TBH I'm in no rush, he'll do it when he's ready.

cleaninglady · 27/03/2007 21:29

[hand up] my ds is 2.7 and i did make a bit of an effort a few weeks ago and he did really well but back in pull ups now as i couldnt deal with having to stay in indefinately whilst it happened! I have to do shopping, coffee mornings, errands, pick up dd from school etc - I would be interested to hear about toilet training 2nd child ideas when your constantly on the go with firstborn!

fennel · 27/03/2007 21:32

I think we could count in your line-up. dd3 (3 next month) is officially out of nappies, due to pressure from pre-school and so on, but is fairly incontinent, I wouldn't have said she was "ready". if she wasn't nearly 3 I'd have left it for longer.

PinkTulips · 27/03/2007 21:37

dd is only 2 and trained but all the other kids at toddler group are far older... closer to 3 and not yet trained. the only one who is trained was 3 the same week she was 2 and is at the same stage of potty training as her. they all look at me like i'm some pushuy mom as none of their kids are ready!

it's perfectly normal for it to take til well past 2.5 or even 3 to be ready so i wouldn't pay too much heed to the childminder

margo1974 · 27/03/2007 21:39

me - when out and about

yomellamoHelly · 27/03/2007 22:08

Ds1 is 3 1/2 and still in nappies. Have had a concerted effort over the last couple of months to get him used to sitting on a toilet but shows no interest in potty training. Whilst he enjoys the whole ritual of flushing the loo and washing his hands he doesn't care if his nappy is wet or poo laden. Have tried him in pants twice now over the last year, but again does not notice if he's wet or pooed himself and I couldn't be doing with little puddles everywhere. Think it'll still be quite a while.

nzshar · 27/03/2007 22:42

Another one here. DS is 2.9 and not yet trained. Have try 2 times in the last 6 months but only lasted 2 days each time just not a clue Planning on trying again over easter break but really dont hold much hope think it may be nearer 3 for him. Not too worried apart from the pressure that nursery may put on him if hes not ready by the time he goes. As a former nursery worker for 14 years and a childminder for the past 18 months im a little concerned that your childminder does not realise that all children are different, and there is no steadfast rule at what age a child should be toilet trained. They will all get there in the end - well thats the mantra i use

BabiesEverywhere · 01/04/2007 08:53

I do believe that you have to wait until your child is ready to be potty trained before you start and I'll be waiting until I see that in my own daughter and we aim to start potty training at some point between 2 and 4 years old.

That said it is possible for a baby to be clean and dry earlier. fuzzywuzzy I think your mum use to EC you and your siblings. i.e. Stick you on the potty at set times so you wee'd/poo'd on the potty not in your nappy. It is NOT potty training but it does allow a baby to be clean and dry before they are capable of walking and talking.

My own daughter has been ECed since she was 10 weeks old and she has been in trainer pants during the day since she was 5.5 months old (she is 7 months old now) She has been clean for months and is often dry.

So your mum is not mad, she just used a different parenting method.

bigknickersbigknockers · 01/04/2007 09:38

I am in the same situation as you yawning, pre school want DS2 potty trained before he moves upstairs to the nursery, but he isnt ready. He is 2yrs 10 mths old and my plan was to let it happen during the summer months when he would be running around the garden without a nappy but because he will move up to the nursery when he is 3 yrs old I dont think he will be trained which means he will stay downstairs with the pre schoolers. DS1 was potty trained at 3 yrs old but I am feeling pressured to get DS2 potty trained almost to a schedule which to me seems wrong. He now goes to pre school still in a nappy which they take off but he very rarely does a wee on the potty.. instead he seems to hold it in then wets himself the minute I get him home, before I can get him on the potty.
Sorry I am waffling on, I just want you to know you are not on your own with this problem.

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