Hands up those with a 2and a half plus still in nappies

[yawningmonster]

Getting pressure from childminder, mil and friends to train ds who is no where near ready and is in fact kind of scared of the toilet and potty. I am not stressed and have told them there are plenty of children not trained at his age and he will do it when ready...so say they "where are these children, I've never come accross one training this late, you'll miss your chance and he won't train until he is at school and be ridiculed!!!" so back me up here who has a child over 2 and a half wtill in nappies please sign in here.....

DS is 2.6 and we're going to give it a go next week (ie after Easter which is going to involve at least one trip to grandparents - would rather not be dealing with half-trained toddler on GPS lovely white carpet...) Had a go in January, DS interested in toilet, potty, flushing it, sitting on potty, following everyone into the loo BUT doesn't seem to have the faintest idea he needs to wee or poop till he's done so. Wish me luck...

I think (getting all philosophical now) that we as a society have all sorts of weird and artificial deadlines about when children should sleep through, learn to read, be potty trained etc.... and those deadlines don't bear much relationship to the development of actual children - especially the fact that they're all different and have their own pace of doing things.

I especially dislike the idea that children who do those things earlier are somehow "better". [spits with distaste]

I agree, WM. I'd far rather have a happy child than one who meets targets. FFS, he didn't walk till he was 17mo - should I have told him he was disgusting for still dragging himself about the floor on his hands and knees and MADE him walk?!

Yes, exactly HM. Now, I have a toddler who walked very early - does this make her a better child? Does it make me a better parent?? Is this going to go on her CV when she starts looking for a job? ffs.

that anyone should think these things mean anything. There's so much worry about being a parent anyway - why do people add to it by stressing about things that have no significance.

LOL at age of walking on a CV So mad!

So, Master Munker, what qualities do you feel make you an ideal candidate for hedge fund manager?

I talked in complete sentences at a year.

Oh, bravo! Anything else?

Yes, I walked at 9m.

Go on?

I still wet the bed when I was six.

Well, Master Munker, thank you for your time, and I wish you every success finding employment as, perhaps, a road sweeper. Now, don't let the door bang your arse on the way out.

HM

My mum insists we were all toilet trained at some freakily early age and no-one has ever asked me about this in a job interview. I could have been CEO of a large multinational by now, if only they'd just asked.....

And my sister practically walked home from the maternity unit, and it hasn't got her even 1 lawyer job.... She's quite good at walking, doesn't fall down much, so obviously it's all down to having had the extra practice.

I think children who potty train early have mothers who have WAY too much time on their hands [stirs for the sake of it]

Well, during dd1's brief flirtation with toilet training, I did get mightily sick of spending all day in the bathroom while dd1 busily flushed the loo, washed her hands with soap, took all her clothes off down to and including her socks, put them back on, washed her hands, flushed the loo....

I'd rather have a life, frankly.

As I said, too much time on their hands.

I am obviously not talking of children who were ready to potty train early and rarely if ever had accidents.

PMSL at the last few posts.

I've never ever wondered what age my friends potty trained/talked/walked at. Can you imagine thinking 'he's got a nice walk - I bet he was an early walker'

In respnse to the OP: we tried training DS1 when he was 2.9 and he had absolutely no interest whatsoever, so all that ended up happening was two weeks of washing and cleaning and all of us getting fraught, so we stopped. When he was 3.2 he realised that he was the only one in his nursery class still in nappies, and started getting interested in the whole going to the toilet thing. within 2 weeks he was dry, took about another 3 weeks before he was clean. By 3.5 he was out of night-time nappies and is now fully dry (some of his friends who ere trained at 2yo still have sodden nappies in the morning).
Certainly encourage hom to use a toilet / potty, but to those who say he's the only one, respond with a {raspberry emoticon!!!}

can't put my hands up, as mine are older but can back you up, didnt even start until 2.5, much better in the summer and when you are ready.........

Me too, daughter is nearly 2.5 but I have barely begun to think about potty training. Basically I'm waiting until the weather is warmer and drier so that there are fewer clothes to wash when she has accidents. She has to be potty trained in time for school in September, so she will be.

I like letting her do everything in her own time, anyway, and work life out for herself rather than be given someone else's timetable to work to. She's not a robot, but a thinking, feeling, imaginative human being.

moondog

3easterbunnies... - I saw an excellent TV programme (in France) about toilet training recently that said that there was nothing to worry about until a child was around 7 and that even then, most problems were physiological and required medical intervention.

Psychological problems arise only when parents have been too dogmatic and too early in their demands for children to be toilet trained.

Moondog's attitude isn't the right one.

Ds1 is 2.4 and not potty trained. He's not showing any signs of being ready. My mum keeps saying "you were trained at 1" blah blah blah. As long as he's toilet trained by 3.3 when he starts pre school I couldn't give a stuff.

dd is 2.9 and has no interest whatsoever.

I have tried a couple of times and she's just not bothered about being wet. I give up after 3 days if there is no progress (ie not one wee on potty)

I don't think we have ever managed to catch a whole wee in a potty, and only one poo. I will start to persevere after a couple of days if we get even that small amount of progress during our "tester" time.

imho when she decides to do it she will crack it in a couple of days.

I'm not in a hurry (good job really because neither is she ).

My ds is 14 months and my mother is already asking when we are going to potty train him. It's driving me mad as I've explained that the current school of thought is to be led by your child, but she won't let it drop. One of my friends' sons both potty trained when they were 3.5 ish...

Anna8888, if your DD is going to an Ofsted-registered preschool, no need for her to be potty trained - it's discriminatory to insist they are.

Anna888 so speaks the voice of a woman who trained late

trained mine early no problems whatsoever - please try not to generalise

Ds is 2.8 and still in nappies. We attempted potty training at Christmas because he was showing all the signs of being ready but turns out he was not ready, he got really upset and started holding it in. I was going to try this week but he has been ill so I will wait for a few weeks, I think he is ready but we will have to see. We are not in any rush I think it is a lot easier when they are in nappies.

My two are older now, but DD was 3.5 when she trained (and dry at night about a year later).

DS was about 3 and was dry at night almost immediately.

Left both of them until they were ready and we were pretty much sorted within a week of starting. Only had a few minor accidents with DS since (he's now 3.6)

All children are different - I certainly didn't push mine despite my mum telling me that I was potty trained at about a year . Considering I didn't actually walk until I was 16 months (was premature) that's possibly because once she stuck me on the potty, I couldn't actually get off and go anywhere)

Moondog - what a strange attitude.

hunkermunker - thank you for the info. In fact, we are in France and the law requires children to be toilet trained when they start nursery school (in the September of the calendar year in which they have their third birthday).

I didn't try with either of mine until after they were over 2 and a half and indicated that they were ready. The result was it was really easy with both of them (I know this is part luck!). Friends who pushed younger children into it before they were ready and who told me I left it too long are still struggling with wet underwear many months down the line - do it when you think is right for your ds, it'll be a lot less sressful for both of you!

Ds is 3.5 and still n nappies, doesn't want to wear pants but will go on the loo occasionlly.