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Parenting

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Original poster

Hands up those with a 2and a half plus still in nappies

101 replies

yawningmonster · 27/03/2007 04:59

Getting pressure from childminder, mil and friends to train ds who is no where near ready and is in fact kind of scared of the toilet and potty. I am not stressed and have told them there are plenty of children not trained at his age and he will do it when ready...so say they "where are these children, I've never come accross one training this late, you'll miss your chance and he won't train until he is at school and be ridiculed!!!" so back me up here who has a child over 2 and a half wtill in nappies please sign in here.....

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

3easterbunniesandnomore · 01/04/2007 09:53

my 2 1/2 year old isn't ready to be trained yet...and, still have trouble with my 4 year old and his blinking toilet issues...he has constipation probs, and even though we finally are getting somewhere with him, i.e. less often things end up in his pants...and more goes into the potty, there are situation where he has to wear pull ups....as an accident whilest out just would cause more trauma then anything....
He is also still in nightnappies....
I do start to feel that it's never ending...everytime we have loads of success and seem to get there for good he goes down wiht somehting or other and we are back at square one, sigh!

ShoshableEggEater · 01/04/2007 09:54

I use a method of training which been using in 26 years of CMing, DONT TRY TILL THE CHILD ASKS, then take there nappy off and no pants for a few days, you will get lots of accidents for the first few days, once they get the hang of getting to the potty on time move onto pants, again they will wet them a lot for a few days, then once they have the hang of it, back into their trousers/tights, expect to be stuck in the house/garden for a few days, putting a nappy back on for ant reason (apart from sleep) tends to confuse them.

It usually takes 7/10 days till dry.

IMO boys are usually nearer 3 than 2, girls nearer 2.

Good luck.

welliemum · 01/04/2007 09:54

Another one here!

My dd1 is the same age as your ds, YM, as you know.

A few weeks ago she said she wanted knickers so we did that. She was OK but had a few accidents which she didn't like, and started asking for nappies again, so she's back in nappies. Suits me!

I like the idea that she'll decide when she's ready and I get really cross at the idea of this being a competition against other children!

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JackieNo · 01/04/2007 10:04

I didn't train DS till a month or 2 ago - he was 3.2, and got it almost immediately - he didn't seem at all ready before.

Greenleeves · 01/04/2007 10:15

ds2 is 2.8 and still in nappies, I am working on it gradually but can't see any sense in rushing it.

hunkermunker · 01/04/2007 10:19

Meeeeeeeeeee! DS1 is 3 on Tuesday and has just started doing wees on the potty before his bath - until last week, he wouldn't sit on the potty. We're moving house this month so not going to push it till we're settled there - don't believe in stressing out children or myself

hunkermunker · 01/04/2007 10:20

Oh, and I know several children who trained relatively early who still wet themselves at nearly 5 and their mums say they think they rushed doing them.

3easterbunniesandnomore · 01/04/2007 10:27

oh, and es we tried him first at just over 2, but got no-where, and then tried him teh year later and he was dry just like that...out of nappies and dry and about 1/2 year later he was out of nappies in the night, too....

ChocolateGirl · 01/04/2007 22:44

DS1 trained quite quickly about a month before his third birthday.

DS2 took about a fortnight in August when he was 3 and 3 months. Really thought we weren't going to make it to school nursery in September... but luckily he got the hang of it just in time.

Just started with DD who was 3 last month... and I fear she is taking after DS2!!

procrastimater · 01/04/2007 23:08

yes ds is 2 and 8 months he is in a very long and drawn out potty training process which is only middling successful - he will wee in potty insert (it is similar to what you use in hospital to wee in) he holds it in front of himself quite happily but he is still in nappies when we go out. He does not give enough warning prior to wee and I have to constantly monitor him. Very glad we have laminate flooring (except when I nearly broke my neck skidding one of his puddles!!) - the sofa has taken quite a few soakings as well. But unless I am prepared to take him out trouserless I cannot say he is trained. I use chocolate to bribe him which does work but I am a bit bored wth the cheerleader style routine i HAVE to go into everyime he squeezes out a wee, he has pooed in potty but has regressed recently. Today he had dihorrea so nappies very necessary...

I really don't think potties are much use for boys as they find them difficult to sit on and wee downwards - using a bowl/ cup or something to wee in standing up is much easier for them to grasp and less stressful - my sister has always used cups etc. instead of potties and has 6 boys so I bow to her experience. My mum thinks I should have potty trained him by 18 months but I think it is a generational thing - fact is I was 8 months preg and moving house when ds was 18m so if she thought I could handle potty training as well then!!!? she is very mistaken!

Gobbledigook · 01/04/2007 23:14

Ds3 is 2.7 and is still in his nappies. With ds1 and ds2 I waited until they were almost 3 and they cracked it in a matter of days with no accidents afterwards.

Friends did their children much earlier but it was a long, drawn out process and they spent a long while carrying around spare clothes and dealing with accidents.

Not worth it imo - much, much easier if you wait until they are really ready.

moondog · 01/04/2007 23:16

'Nowhere near ready.'
Hmmmmmmmm,I'm nowhere near ready to earn a living,wake up at 6:30 and cook every night but I do.

It's gross having ambulant verbal children wetting and pooing themselves (SN excepted naturally.)

procrastimater · 01/04/2007 23:22

That is a bit harsh moondog -

hunkermunker · 01/04/2007 23:24

DS1 was horrified at the idea of a potty or a toilet, MD. I didn't want to force him or bribe him, so I thought I'd wait till he was ready to do it for himself. Plus, as I say, I knew we were going to move, he was just getting used to having his little brother around last summer and I had PND, so didn't want to be forcing an upset child to do something he wasn't ready for.

You can't equate it with cooking dinner, fgs!

Califrau · 01/04/2007 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

welliemum · 01/04/2007 23:25

Couldn't disagree more with your analogy, Moondog.

Earning a living-type things have to be done. The consequences of not doing those things are serious. So we get on and do them even when we don't feel like it.

The consequences of a toddler not being potty trained are.......well, nothing really. They wear nappies. They need to have their nappy changed. It's not the end of the world.

(And they're a good deal cleaner than toddlers in knickers IME!)

MiserableCow · 01/04/2007 23:26

Haven't read the whole thread, just OP. I'd have been livid if anyone had said that to me yawningmonster. I trained DS at 3.5 yrs because he wasn't ready before that. Actually, I didn't train him, I bought him a potty at 2 years old and told him that it was for wees and poos. By 3.5 years old he had developed all the necessary skills to use it reliably and we stopped using nappys. I do NOT understand why some parents see toilet training as a race. My advice would be to leave it until he shows signs of being ready. Ignore this nonsense coming from childminder, MIL and friends.

MiserableCow · 01/04/2007 23:28

I don't think it's gross at all! If they are wearing a nappy why is it different to a baby weeing and pooing?

hunkermunker · 01/04/2007 23:33

Plus if they're NOT ready, all they'll do is wee and poo in pants, which is FAR more gross than a nappy.

MiserableCow · 01/04/2007 23:37

The pants bit doesn't bother me to much HM. Carpet stains are a bugger though.

colander · 01/04/2007 23:38

DD1 was 2 years and 9 months before she was ready. I waited until she was completely ready, and she was dry/clean from day 1. I think she had one accident. Her cousin was about 3.5 before she was ready. It's like walking - they walk at different times, so of course they will potty train at different times - they need to have developed the physical ability to control their sphincters! Luckily DD1's cousin is older, so all MILs nagging was directed at SIL and not me. Anyone who has potty "trained" very early has actually potty "timed".

lemonaid · 01/04/2007 23:39

I think that's bollocks, moondog. DS (OK, not 2 and a half yet, but ambulant and verbal) has no concept of when he wants to go. He's actually quite keen on the whole concept of toilets and potties, because some of his friends are potty trained and he clearly thinks it's a cool thing to do, but if he wees when not in a nappy it evidently comes as a complete surprise to him.

Come to think of it, I know several children who were ambulant and verbal by about 15 months. Should they all have also been out of nappies by then? Is there some mysterious link between gross motor skills / language development and the nerves controlling the urinary system that has hitherto escaped the experts?

GreenandBlackOtter · 01/04/2007 23:42

my daughter didn't talk till 2 but out of nappies 19 months

hunkermunker · 01/04/2007 23:42

And there ARE people who think that ambulant, verbal children shouldn't be bfeeding either - and we know what MD thinks of them

(NOT equating shitey nappies with bfeeding, btw)

mollymawk · 01/04/2007 23:44

I disagree that your analogy is right, moondog. You are physically capable of doing all those things (although I fully understand that you don't like doing them!). I think for children and potty training it is a question of what they are physically capable of, isn't it?

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