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Parenting

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Original poster

what is would you suggest getting dd's ears peirced?

44 replies

igotissues · 12/01/2007 23:48

my dd is almost 4 months and my dp's mum keeps going on at him to get dd's ears pierced. Im not sure if I want to pierce them so young, though ive seen loads of younger girls (and boys) with theirs pierced. My dp's mum keeps pressuring dp to get dd's ears pierced anyway - whether I agree or not! just asking for opinions on this. I have to admit that im diggin my heels in to show my dp's mum who's boss (or mum in this case). Im worried that if I give in to her, then that will pave the way for her to dictiate how we raise our daughter. Any advice or opinions?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

sandcastles · 13/01/2007 00:32

It was horrible to watch. Dh was in a shop a few doors down & he asked me "what the hell was all that screaming"

It was heartbreaking & I had tears in my eyes!

nappyaddict · 13/01/2007 00:35

i am shocked by parents replies on this and this !!!

nappyaddict · 13/01/2007 00:37

btw if you do decide to go through with it don't go somewhere like claire's that uses a gun and just does it in the shop. the best places are the ones that take you into a private room and they use a needle.

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bandstand · 13/01/2007 00:42

they must be american

suzycreamcheese · 13/01/2007 00:48

sandcastles - that's a horror story, and surely at least the 'piercer' should have to check its the parent with child..cruel and shocking

colditz · 13/01/2007 00:50

To the OP

Please, please don't do this. You are leving your precious beautiful baby girl open to all kinds of awful infections. People will think you are really cruel and IMHO it is really cruel.

It hurts! Why would you do that to such perfect creature as a baby?

yeahinaminute · 13/01/2007 00:57

Reading that link almost had me throwing my vodka martini at the screen ( Friday night is cocktails and poker night in the YIAM household - I've escaped to the study as I'm pretty sure DH, Wunsun ( number one son !!) and his mate Bertie are cheating me !! - I digress) I took DD ( 4 last Tuesday) to the docs for her pre - school vacs yesterday and to see that and the pain it caused her was enough to make me run to the hills and protect her forever .... now, I can understand a cultural inclination to have this done - witness my previous post - But no, why harm a perfect shell - like ear for no other reason than vanity - on the mothers behalf to boot ????

nappyaddict · 13/01/2007 01:05

i had my ears pierced when i was 3 or 4, because my sister had hers done and i wanted them pierced. for quite a few years i have taken to only wearing earrings when i go on a night out. at least wait until she asks you to get them done.

oversted · 13/01/2007 01:16

Actually, the more I think about it...

Perhaps your dp's mum might like to pick out a nice design from the local tattoo parlour, & you could have that done too?

There's no way your dd's grandma has the right to nag you to get dd's ears pierced, simply because they aren't grandma's ears. She can do what she likes with her own body!

As for the 'common' thing, if you care of course, it changes so rapidly. When I was a teenager, having your nose or lip or (eek!) tongue pierced was really quite hardcore & could be relied on to annoy your parents no end - now it's chavtastic, unless you happen to be Princess Anne's daughter...

I just don't get the mentality of someone who would plonk a small baby down in a jeweller's chair, listen to them scream as the needle or the studs go in, & contemplate the results with satisfaction.

I really, really don't understand why anyone could think it a good idea.

LadyOfTheFlowers · 13/01/2007 01:18

my mum had mine pierced when i was 1. too young to remember the paqin she said. luckily i liked my ear rigns when i got older.
my nephew is 4 and has his ear pierced and i think it looks awful. i think it is like forcing kids to grow up and look older which, looking around, i dont think they need any encouragement.

bandstand · 13/01/2007 08:39

I wasn't allowed until i was 16

NotQuiteCockney · 13/01/2007 08:46

OMG, that first thread on the other board.

People saying, 'oh, my sister didn't get her girl pierced yet, and now she's big and would struggle' .

I know, back home, nearly all girls have pierced earrings, but it's a bit gross and horrid to have it done when they're tiny, and to have it be required.

(I had mine done at 8, my sister was 4, and she had hers done then too. Actually, my mom had hers done then, as well. DH is opposed to our DSes having any piercings done until they are 18 or whatever, and I think that's fine.)

Quootiepie · 13/01/2007 08:49

Wait until your DD ASKS for her ears peirced. Imagine someone holding you down and peircing your nipple or something, without consent etc.

Rumpel · 13/01/2007 08:53

Don't do it is my opinion. I refuse to pierce anyone under 6 years old and if they are under 15 they need 1 parent with them. Children are much more likely to rip out earrings or let them close over and each time you get them done creates more scar tissue causing problems healing. They are also less able to keep them clean properly so more prone to infections. I had an adult client once whose lobe was hanging in 3 seperate strips due to this and wearing heavy earrings. If you do do it make sure that you only allow studs for the first year to allow the hole to heal properly.

olivo · 13/01/2007 10:04

OMG - sandcastles - that story is my worst mightmare! ! i can't ever let anyone take my dd out now, just in case...

igotissues - stand by your decision!and let her decide when she is older. i got mine done when i was 15, having pestered my mum until she relented. i now wish i never had!

nutcracker · 13/01/2007 10:07

My dd's were both 2.6 ish and they were both fine Dd1 didn't even cry and neither messed with them at all and let me clean them when ever they needed it.

I had mine done at the same age too.

DetentionGrrrl · 13/01/2007 11:36

4mths!!!!!! She's a baby, not a toy.

Had mine done at around 3 or 4 i think.

It's dangerous to do it so young as their ears are developing and fleshy- have heard of the studs being embedded and cut out. I can only imagine the pain that would cause a baby.

Original poster

igotissues · 13/01/2007 19:32

Oh my gosh! Sorry i wasnt around earlier, BUT i've only just got out of bed (no Joking!) DP was supposed to take dd out for the day - including to visit his mum - while I had some time to myself (please read as got the shopping in, done the washing and ironing and tidied the house). I thought about this in bed last night and decided agaunst it. DD has a slight cold so I told DP she shouldnt go out, but I was actually scared that she'd come back with pierced ears. (Ive been in bed all day because Im so shattered all the time and I thought I deserved the rest).

Thank you for all your anecdotes and advice - I really dont know wht i must have been thinking of even considering it but my mind is made up now! Im going to tell DP and his mum that under no uncertain terms should they get my dd's ears pierced - when the time is right I will get them done.

It is a cultural thing really and dps mum is a bit forbidable, so im not looking forward to telling her. Hope it goes OK and i'll be back on this post if I need more help flexing my verbal muscles. Thanks to all...and Custardo

OP posts:

babalon · 13/01/2007 20:15

Have told my dd (10) she can't get hers done until her 13th b'day this has stuck since she first asked at 7years old and I'm not backing down, dispite regular tantrums. I think little girls are pretty enough without precious metals attatched to them and it should be the childs choice in the end. There are other issues off pe at school and dance classes etc not allowing it.

TBH I'd just dig your heels in and wait.

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