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How to tell a 5 yr old about periods?

100 replies

Bubblesmum · 02/01/2007 20:43

Hi,
My 5 year old daughter has become curious about the bins in the ladies for STs and Tampons and wants to know what's in them? and will try to look at every opportunity (yuck!).
I have always tried to be honest with her and give her age appropriate answers to questions like 'how does the baby get out of your belly' ? etc... but I'm finding it hard to come up with an age appriopriate way to tell her about periods.

Any advice?

Thanks !!

OP posts:
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gothicmama · 02/01/2007 20:44

I told dd it was something women had each month that only women had

MerryChristmasPANDAGHappyNewYe · 02/01/2007 20:46

I told my 2 that every month your body gets ready to have a baby grow inside, and that if a baby doesn't start to grow the soft lining isn't needed and you bleed, that it is nothing to worry about. The truth, but very simple. HTH

colditz · 02/01/2007 20:49

I told my 3 year old boy that sometimes a lady grows a squishy bed in her tummy to grow a baby. If a baby doesn't come, it melts and comes out onto a pad. It doesn't hurt, because it's not really blood, it's just red.

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emmatomATO · 02/01/2007 20:56

I said exactly the same as Panda to my two a couple of years ago. It's honest, it's language they understand and it takes away the inquisitiveness. Makes life a lot easier.

Pablothelittleredfox · 02/01/2007 20:57

I've got boys and they haven't asked yet (still very little) - I'd go with something like colditz said.

emmatomATO · 02/01/2007 20:59

I have a boy and girl Pablo and they both, at around the same age, asked the same questions, so it's not just a girl thing.

Blandmum · 02/01/2007 20:59

TBH I told her thery are things that women and girls need after puberty. She didn't ask me any more, so, atm, I have left it at that. For that time.

You don't have to tell them everything at once IMHO, just to answer the questions that they ask. When they are happy with the answer they stop asking.

fireflyxmasfairylights2 · 02/01/2007 21:07

My 4yr old came in the bathroom whilst I was changing a pad & asked me what it was. I said it happens every month to a woman if she has no baby in her tummy.. simple terms. The the last time she came in the bathroom & saw the packet of pads she said "Oh, I see you're not having a baby" So I may have confused her somewhat

scatterbrain · 02/01/2007 21:10

My dd is 6 and hasn't asked yet - although it seems that some of her friends have asked their mums - so its only a matter of time really !!

The friends have said to their mums things like tey are worried about grwoing up as they don't want to bleed every month !! I was shocked that this was coming up so young t bh !

Bubblesmum · 03/01/2007 14:33

Thanks for all the replies so far. All good explanations.

But, yes, I think it is a bit young to be telling them the full truth and I'd expect my DD to also be worried about this happening to her.

I think I would prefer to be able to give her some what of a truthful explanation without telling her all about periods.

I mean she is just asking why there are bins in the loos and whats in them?

If I said, something like its because 'you sometimes need to wear pads to keep your panties clean need someplace to dispose of the dirty ones' would that be enough I wonder... and then if she asks more I can elaborate.
What do you think?

Thanks again

OP posts:
MerryChristmasPANDAGHappyNewYe · 03/01/2007 14:47

Sounds fine to me, if she is just asking about the bins, rather than the reason for periods. I totally agree with only answering what they have asked - just that mine walked in on me and asked if I was ok, and why I was bleeding!

kslatts · 03/01/2007 14:50

My oldest dd is 7 and I have been wondering when to speak to her about periods as she has never asked about bins in toilets or tampax in the bathroom, etc I haven't said anything yet and probably wont for another year or so unless she asks.

scatterbrain · 03/01/2007 20:15

Oh mine has asked about the bins - I just said they were bins tbh ! She didn't pursue it !

Blandmum · 03/01/2007 20:17

Kids tend to know their own 'comfort zone' when it comes to asking about potentialy sensitive topics. They will stop at the point where they have enough info and tend to stop before they get themselves into something that might make them worried or upset.

Granted, there comes a time when they need to know, but that is a different issue I think.

christie1 · 03/01/2007 20:53

you know your child and how much she can handle. There are good books out on topics about the female body. I read them wtih my dd and ds but read them first myself then picked only the parts I thought they were ready for. Some are quite good with cartoon illustrations and simple messages.

Rhubarb · 03/01/2007 20:55

My dd is 6 and I've told her that periods happen to women every month and it starts when you are a teenager. I tell her that you lose some blood but it doesn't hurt and you use the towels and tampons to stop the blood spoiling your knickers.

She hasn't asked further. I don't want to frighten her but neither do I want to protect her from something that is natural and shouldn't really be seen as frightening. If she can get used to the idea now then she'll take it in her stride when it happens.

Heathcliffscathy · 03/01/2007 21:02

look i know i'm a right on pita, but what is so big and scarey about the truth, that they 'don't need to know it yet'?

is this about their comfort zones, or ours???

Pablothelittleredfox · 03/01/2007 23:43

Well at 4 or 5 they are asking a simple question and are not expecting a reply that might upset them.

I remember finding it quite upsetting and a bit scary finding out quite a bit older than that.

On the flip side to your pov sophable, I think some parents nowadays load too much truth on young shoulders expecting them just to take it on board and cope with it like an adult.

nikkie · 04/01/2007 00:01

Just to side track a bit if you start your periods young , does it tend to be that your children will?
DD1 has never asked anything, but she is 7 now and I was 8 when I started,wondered if I should bring it up?

Blandmum · 04/01/2007 09:05

well, for me it is deffinatly her confort zone. As I teach sex ed to classes of up to 30 children I have no worries on that front at all I'm bomb proof!

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 04/01/2007 09:16

I agree with sophable. There's no earthly reason why the normal functions of the human body should be frightening to a young child, unless they are picking up that we are uncomfortable talking about it.

morningpaper · 04/01/2007 09:18

I'm with scatterbrain. We had this conversation recently

"Don't touch that please, it's not very clean"
"What is it?"
"A bin."

If she'd asked "What's in it" I would have said "Rubbish"

She's seen me with my Mooncup so knows that women bleed sometimes and this thing just catches it so it's nice and clean. She didn't pursue it.

I wouldn't pursue this conversation just from the sanitary bins though - I would just say that they are bins.

Enid · 04/01/2007 09:21

same as rhubarb here

my 4 yera old knows as well

Enid · 04/01/2007 09:22

I did try and fob her off but she wasn't having any

I have told her that when she starts her periods she will get a treat from me - shopping or something

I think she is now rather willing it to happen

Enid · 04/01/2007 09:22

thats the 7 year old btw not the 4 year old

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