Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Original poster

Child distributing indecent video without consent.

85 replies

triplethefun · 11/02/2016 11:04

Not sure what topic this should be posted on. My dd's 'friend' videoed her naked getting changed for swimming and sent the recording via snapchat to 3 boys. My dd was unaware she was being recorded. We're utterly devastated. One of the boys has allegedly screenshotted the images and showed others. My dd is 11 years old, her 'friend' is 12. The school are involved but are underplaying what we feel is a very serious situation as this all happened outside school hours. The 'friends' parents are on holiday and have not been informed. Does anyone know where we can get some advice about this? Lots of info online about sexting but this is completely different!

OP posts:
Fourormore · 11/02/2016 11:05

Police. This is a crime.

SweepTheHalls · 11/02/2016 11:05

Call the police. Distribution of images of this type is illegal and they will act.

anorakgirl · 11/02/2016 11:05

Straight to the police and inform school you have done this

Peppapigallowsmetoshower · 11/02/2016 11:07

Police. Straight away. My goodness, some friend. If my child did this I'd be bloody furious, your poor daughter. The school need a kick up the ass as well.

lunar1 · 11/02/2016 11:07

Police ASAP

Potterwolfie · 11/02/2016 11:08

Definitely needs not to be underplayed by the school, they need to step up and handle this properly.

Inform the police and reinforce to your daughter she's done nothing wrong, she will be fine and not get into trouble, I hope she's okay.

bearleftmonkeyright · 11/02/2016 11:11

I also say police. The school need a massive kick up the arse about it also. Was it a school swimming lesson?

harrasseddotcom · 11/02/2016 11:12

Personally, i would go to the police and ask for them to be involved. Id wouldnt want the 12 year old to be charged, because that will stick with her through life and I dont think 12 year old can comprehend the full damage of this action. That said Id want the police and school to come down hard on her so that she can see how serious this crime is. Is there any way to contact the parents? They must have mobile number left with whoever is caring for the friend.

WhoTheFuckIsSimon · 11/02/2016 11:13

I say police as well. Sounds like the schoo. Aren't taking it seriously and at least the police should hopefully make sure this isn't distributed any further. Your poor dd. And what a horrible friend!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 11/02/2016 11:50

What a dreadful thing for the 'friend' to have done! I would be contacting the police and the 'friend's^ parents about this - it is a thoroughly nasty thing to do - and at 12, I would expect her to have some understanding of why this is such an unacceptable and nasty thing to do.

Topsy34 · 11/02/2016 13:00

Police, without hesitation.

I would think seeking some extra support for your daughter would benefit her.

P1nkP0ppy · 11/02/2016 13:02

Police.
Poor girl, the school needs to up its game too.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 11/02/2016 13:04

Police.

They were distributing child pornography.

dangerrabbit · 11/02/2016 13:05

Police.

Your child's school has a safeguarding issue too which I'm sure ofsted would take an interest in if they were aware...

Clobbered · 11/02/2016 13:05

Appalling that the school are underplaying this. They are failing in their safeguarding duties big-style. Another vote for police. If only to shock the school into a proper response. Old enough to have a phone = old enough to use it responsibly. Distributing a secretly filmed naked video of a 'friend' - completely unacceptable at any age. Sod the consequences for the 12 year old, you need to protect your DD.

stealtheatingtunnocks · 11/02/2016 13:06

What action have the school taken?

Do the boys' parents know?

Who did the boy send the images to?

Do the "friend"'s parents know?

Aren't they concerned that their children are spreading illegal images of a minor?

Yep, I'd be going to the Police too. And, asking for CEOPS the community officer to do an assembly at school explaining what the law is and why this sort of behaviour is a crime.

Not funny, and you are not over reacting. Apart form anything else, your daughter will be glad to see you standing up for her.

Good luck

honeysucklejasmine · 11/02/2016 13:07

How awful. Your poor DD. Police, definitely.

NewLife4Me · 11/02/2016 13:08

Poor girl, and yes you should contact the Police it's a very serious matter and a crime.
The friends parents will need to know, maybe if you are friends you can tell them yourself, if not then the Police will do it.
Whether it happened outside school hours or not is immaterial, they have to do something if you report to them, maybe they are worried about the effects on the school and not your dd.

Crispsaregood · 11/02/2016 13:16

If it didn't happen in school swimming lessons, what would you expect the school to do? You said it happened outside school hours so I'm not sure what action they could take if it didn't happen when the school staff were 'in charge'. I would think it is for you to take to the girl's family and the police if you felt that was appropriate.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 11/02/2016 13:22

The school should be supporting the victim, preventing as far as possible further distribution if the footage, and educating the pupils in the seriousness of this crime. The perpetrators may also require support if they end up in the criminal justice system. They may also want to keep an eye on the "friend" as this behaviour could be indicative of other issues.

Plenty the school could/should do...

beeny · 11/02/2016 13:24

I prosecute cases with indecent images children, this is a crime and they should be spoken to by the police. Even if they are not prosecuted.

MTPurse · 11/02/2016 13:27

Police without a doubt.

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe · 11/02/2016 13:27

My 14yo ds was sent a photo on FB of a girl in his year at school, she had taken it herself and sent it to her boyfriend who then sent it out.

My ds told me, I informed the school and they informed the police and the social services who were then involved with the girl and the boy who sent it on. It didn't matter that it was outwith school hours.

Your school is failing in its safeguarding, you need to tell the police.

Your poor dd, she must be devastated.

ThereIsIron · 11/02/2016 13:29

Not a school matter. Call the Police.

NerrSnerr · 11/02/2016 13:29

Your poor daughter, how awful for her. I agree with going to the police.