April Babies

[MrsDoolittle]

Well there had to be one...
Thought I might as well start it at Fennels suggestion.
You have all read enough from me how about you?

Hi Dot - even mre controversial our ds was in his own room from day 4 (we wre out of hospital on day 2)!

This is another 'issue' between dm and I, she can't believe dd is still inour room still and the idea that I am expecting to keep her with us for for 6 months has horrified her. But I have to admit, although she doesn't cry at night she is getting louder at suffling and gurgling when she is awake.
This week I have had problems settling her in the evenings - I think it is bad wind, but I can't seem to burp her very well. Also she bf much better off one side over the other. Everything was going swimmingly last week but things seem to be going a little pear shaped this week. She is definately alot more difficult to settle and I think I might be starting to lose confidenec on the old bf front. I wonder if I am filling up one side better than the other, or whether she is latching on properly to cause her so much discomfort in the evenings. What upsets me is she seems really happy in between these bouts of wind. I don't think it's colic because her cries are more grisely sounding than distress. She doesn't draw her knees up mor anything like that, just throws herself about a bit every 10 minutes or so.
Anyone any ideas? maybe I should post a bf thread.
I am glad that things seem to b sorting themselves HD. You sounded a bit miserable when I spoke to you last. I think we are going through a bit of a difficult patch at the mo - maybe I am just getting tired!

hi Mrs D - with both my previous babies I found the 4 week mark perhaps the hardest - baby more windy and less content, especially in the evenings. I think they get tired and just cry all evening from a vague tiredness/hunger/existential angst - whatever you call it.

Throwing herself about sounds a bit like wind. My best solution is DP putting her in a sling and taking her for a bracing walk around the block for an hour or so every evening while I recline on the sofa or in bed. (Sadly DP does not always jump at this special bonding opportunity, especially when it's raining...)

Mrs D - ds2 is also getting a bit more difficult to breastfeed at the moment - I think it's because he's 'waking up' - looking around more and not being the easy sleepy baby he was a couple of weeks ago! Really want to carry on though - I just hold him a lot more firmly and keep getting him latched on properly if he pulls himself around a lot (ouch!). We've got into quite a nice routine in the evening/night - he falls asleep between 8pm - 8.30pm (clearly hasn't read GF - should be 7pm..!), so we put him to bed and both go to bed aswell! Then it's a feed at about 11pm, and last night that took him through until 4am - hurrah!! Mind you, he was then awake until 5.30am, by which time I was nearly flinging him out of the window... But then sleep until 7am. Can't complain - just crave more sleep..!

Am feeling much better about him being in his own room, and I bring him into bed for the 7am feed, so we doze for a while together after that (wonderful dp has got up with ds1 and made us drinks/food etc.!).

And isn't it amazing how quickly they grow - ds2 is already growing out of his newborn sleepsuits - makes me feel quite sad....

dot1 - I can so relate to what you are saying here. I too feel sad when I see dd is growing out of her newborn stuff. I wonder if I am belatedly getting a bit of the blues. Dd is not crying so much as really uncomfortable and more difficult to settle, although I count myself lucky that she doesn't cry at night and only wakes up once (but this is a long time at the moment). I woke up dog tired this morning having been up for 3 hours during the night allowing dd to suckle and cuddling her through this 'windy' period.
Dh's radio went off at 7am this morning (as per usual) and I asked him to turn it off as I was trying to sleep. His reply was "for God's sake I have to go to work you know!" I was so upset that I stormed into the spare room with my pillow. I really don't think that was an unreasonable request - I worked so hard last night to make sure dd didn't wake him up last night, and she didn't. I couldn't believe he could be such a bar steward this morning when he woke up.
I can't even understand why he is being like this.
Anyway, dd is asleep at the moment and I am taking the opportunity to move the crib and myself into the spare room.

bump

hello have not had a chance 2 feel sad about ds growing out of new borns as has grownout of new born nappys by day 7 !!!
HV weiged him yesterday and he has put on 7 lb in 6 days , is the normal ???
also having harder time in settling now up every 2 hrs regular as clockwork , though i did get a 3 hr stint last night yahoo

Hi dolbear, 7lb in 6 days! Thats amazing but it can't be normal surely?
I stayed in the spare room last night and I am feeling much better this morning. Was up all hours with dd and her wind - poor mite, both of us must have dropped off at about 2.30am. Woke up for a feed at 4.30am and next thing I know its 9.30!!! I think we were both pretty knackered.
How old is your baby now?

Mrs D - I think it's probably mainly exhaustion to blame re: rows/falling out with partners - I did exactly the same the other day - actually stropped out on dp because I thought she was being really unreasonable - I fed the baby, flung him her way and marched out - unfortunately I forgot to take my purse, and it was lunchtime, so I only stayed out an hour because I got hungry!!! Just need more sleep I think...everything that would normally be just a 'normal' row seems so much more serious... have to say dp is being a star and doing the midnight feed so I'm getting a better run of sleep.

Hi all, haven't had much chance to post - still muddling through on the breastfeeding front here. Nipples are much less sore but dd still isn't latching properly (she doesn't gape enough), so I have to use the nipple shields some of the time to stop the soreness coming back. And of course the nipple shields don't help her to learn to latch properly - she kind of licks/sucks the teat in - so it's a bit of a vicious circle really. Still, I'm getting some support from the community midwives, who would have discharged me by now but for this. The local breastfeeding clinic is currently closed for 2 weeks, so the midwives are coming out to me to observe feeds and suggest position changes etc.
Sorry to hear about the wind some of your babies are experiencing - dd had a bad case yesterday, reminded me of when ds had colic . MrsD - hope things have been ok with dh today - I'm sure dot's right re the exhaustion thing.

hi all

hope things are better with everyone with colicky or wakeful babies. Mrs D I would sleep wherever suited me without any guilt - but I'd make DP go in the spare room...

I had a blue day yesterday too, dd3 windy and unhappy all day, then dd1 went to the dentist and has to have 2 fillings. she's only just 4. We feel so guilty, I feel I've neglected her for 9 months being too tired and pregnant to properly supervise teeth cleaning etc in the evenings. Been so rigorous on the healthy eating thing but still failed I can't bear to take her for the treatment.
still, dd3 happier today and slept very well after her bad day yesterday.

Thanks Ladies, I am so glad that you understand, I don't feel so unreasonable.
HD - I wholeheartedly understand that you don't want to go out but if you just want to chat I'll come round if you want.
Dd is much better now, thanks to infacol. She screamed blue murder when we started with it but now she knows it comes before a feed and she is really good.
Dh is also being much more considerate - I think he was quite shocked by my outburst the other evening, he hadn't realised I had been up so long.
Still, I think we will stay in the spare room for the moment!

Hi Mrs Doolittle - my ds is on Infacol too - do you find it makes them 'break wind down below', she says politley , rather than burp it up?

We gave up with the infacol - wasn't sure it was doing any good, but if you've had good results with it I might try again, as ds is still very windy and upset from about 5pm - 8.30pm (when he seems to finally crash out...). Dp and I have been mourning the loss of our spare room - when ds1 was born she used to go in it to feed him and then go to sleep, but now the house is full! I feed ds2 in his room - we've put a lovely comfy chair in there, but then I have to creep back to bed, and disturb dp. Ds1 has also taken to waking at 6am instead of 7am - aarrgghh! I'm sure it's because of all the changes - he's coping brilliantly well, but is waking earlier.

Very excited yesterday and today, because I'm sure ds2 has started smiling!!!! I know it's early - he's 4 weeks tomorrow - but there's definitely signs of a smile starting! When I hold him facing me, he completely relaxes - I can feel him going all calm - and he stares at me and gives me this beautiful smiley look.... Just wonderful! I could stare at him forever - and have to stop myself when ds1 is there because I feel so guilty I'm not giving him attention aswell...

dolbear, did you mean 7 oz? Stan put on 6 oz in first 6 days so not that unusual, but doubling his birth weight would be pretty impressive!

My little sweetie has been "breaking wind" rather loudly for as long as I can remember. She certainly seems less windy now though and we have just had two really good nights. I have to admit, dot1, that she really does grisel in the evenings. I haven't worked out how we are going to sort that one. Every evening so far dh has cooked and we have eaten though dd's crying.
It's upsetting for him because he knows I am eating really quickly to get back to her.
I wonder whether she gets over-tired because when she is not crying she is attached to my boob!!! Any ideas.
Lucyjames - we have already nearly finished one bottle of infacol and I definately getting another one. It doesn't work for everyone I have heard.

Mrs D - we're also champions of speed eating! I remember when ds1 was at this stage, dp and I seriously wondered if we'd ever eat a meal (a) together and (b) taking more than 2 minutes again..! Most tea times I'm managing to breast feed at the table, which keeps ds2 quiet and means we can all eat, but if he's very windy and won't latch on, then it's back to shift eating...

Went to an NCT post natal group a couple of days ago -it's a new group and it felt good to get out and meet other mums with new babies - I'm not normally very good at doing the socialising thing with people I don't know, but it went well, so I'm going to keep going - any excuse to do baby talk..! And I've decided it's going to be the one day of the week I actually use the hairdryer and put some make up on..!

Hi Ladies. Dd hit four weeks old at the weekend - the time has flown.
I have a question. How come dd doesn't sleep at night anymore? She did to start with, only waking for a feed at night and then she would go straight back to sleep. Now she is wide-awake (even in the dark) or if she does fall asleep in my arms as soon as I put her down her eyes snap open again!! I was awake with her for 3 hours last night.

Is she sensing that you're putting her down MrsD? - I remember trying to transfer ds back to his crib once he'd fallen asleep after a feed at night and he would inevitably wake up. Was she windy again last night?
Well done for getting out to your group dot - I'm mostly just doing the school run at the moment (fortunately the school is only about 5 minutes' walk away).
MrsD - I'll email you about meeting up again soon...

Mrs D - just read your question on the other thread about whether to leave them to cry to settle themselves. didn't want to reply on that possibly heated thread! I'd say it's well worth trying leaving them to cry just a bit, not necessarily for ages, but my dd2 used to regularly cry in heartbroken way for about 2 minutes and then go to sleep. if you tried to settle her gently you'd be there all night. it's as though she needed to unwind with a little scream. I'm not advocating controlled crying for a small baby at all, but there's something in between that and never letting them whimper. dd3 also sometimes cries for a minute before nodding off.

dd1 now has chickenpox. dd2 got over hers and has a stomach bug. all 3 dds have colds. such fun, guess this is life with 3 small children hitting in

Thanks Fennel, I don't like letting her cry but dh won't hold her when she does. So if I am in the kitchen or trying to do SOMETHING else I am stuffed. It's just that I have tired recently because she almost won't let me put her down.

She is still beautiful though. Especially when she is sleeping like she is now with her little fists up around her ears!!

Unfortunately I have to let her cry in the mornings sometimes, otherwise I would never get dressed. I don't even get breakfast anymore and I often miss lunch too. Atleast I am losing weight!!

Mrs D - have you tried using a dummy? We didn't want to but it helps if you are trying to make a sandwich and getting stressed ut because your wee one is yellling in the other room. It often sends ds off to sleep in his bouncy chair but we never use it in his cot as we don't want him getting used to only going to sleep with it in.

MrsD - why won't dh hold dd when she cries? Do you mean he wants to leave her to see if she will settle herself? I learned with ds that it's worth getting your baby to do this - as Fennel said, usually they just grisel a bit then go quiet. Can't remember when we started doing this last time though - at the moment I'm still putting dd down for a sleep when she's already fallen asleep (usually while feeding).

Fennel - bad luck re the chicken pox and the colds! Hope dd3 isn't suffering too much - I remember ds getting a cold when he was just a few weeks old.

Sadly dh gives up very easily - he seems to have resigned himself to the fact that only I can settle her. When I ask him to hold her in the evenings and she starts griseling he gives up after a few minutes and puts her in her carrycot - then she really yells. He was upset this evening because I ate with her on my knee because I didn't want her to cry through our dinner (and I wanted to hear Eastenders), atleast she was quiet. He would rather put her down outside the room and shut the door!
He says he is a 'Fordian' and I am a 'Leachian'
(he made up these terms).
HD - I have been putting her down to sleep after she feeds like you have, it's just she is more alert now and that doesn't happen so easily.
I don't know, maybe I am expecting too much of dh, he really does try. It's just his resignation which upsets me and if I challenge him about it we end up arguing. Apparently, I am a fundamentalist! He keeps asking how I expect to cope when she has to go to nursery in September? I disagree and say that everything will have changed by September, but somehow he doesn't seem to believe me.