Being a bisexual parent.

[dizietsma]

Being a bisexual parent has it's drawbacks.

Firstly everyone assumes that 'cos I'm married and have a baby then I must be straight. There seems no opportune way to broach it at playgroup without sounding like a overly strident loony and piping up with "I'm bisexual, don't you know" out of the blue, but at the same time I feel like I'm closeting myself because no-one knows. What's a girl to do?

Secondly, it's all very well if you're a lesbian 'cos then you can go to lesbian mother's groups. And if you're a gay dad then you get the same support group network. Where the hell do I go?

Any other bisexual mums and dads out there?

Well TBH on the Boris scale of sarcastic comments that was only a 4

If I have to explain my jokes, they lose their appeal

Dizi, I meant WelshBoris was going innuendo-crazy, not you.

It just seems to me that you find my predicament a joke. If you think it to be a joke then I would respectfully ask you to take your comments elsewhere.

TBH, for a person so keen to discuss her sexual proclivities, you are awfully touchy when someone makes light of it.

So if a person wants to discuss their sexual orientation they should expect people to take the piss? That's a rather stone age concept to me, I'm afraid.

No, you shouldn't just roll over and let them abuse you for it, but some light ribbing is hardly hardcore homophobia, is it ?

Anyway, the whole point of this thread is I'm not keen to talk about it!

I'm not taking the piss out of your sexuality, Im taking the piss out of your attitude

And no, I wont take my comments elsewhere

If you're not keen to talk about it, why start the damn thread

Well then why do you want people to know about it then ? If you don't wish to discuss it with them, why not just leave them blissfully unaware ?

This thread is clearly a bit beyond me. I hope you sort this issue out as it clearly eats away at you.

I fancy Rod Stewart but dont feel the need to tell everyone

Lighthearted ribbing is one thing, but in this thread I feel I've already been quite tolerant of some very homophobic comments so forgive me if my patience starts to wear a little thin.

Hey, ho. Clearly I thought a little too much of mumsnet, I'll take my quandry elsewhere to more tolerant shores. Nighty night, girls.

You point out one homophobic comment made by me

dizietsma, the jokes are great in this thread, have to say its quite funny reading it.

if u feel u have to answer something or discuss something in a certain way , then u must have the problem not the others who u might be talking too.
and why do u think it matters what people think because u have a baby? to me that kind of attitcude is a bit self indulged. and typical a very gay man i know, my dad.

just because someone wears a hoodie doesnt mean they are going to be classed as X, it could be a juciy hoodie. so just because you have a baby dont assume everyone even thinks it yours - you could be the nanny!!

so make ur mind up
is the focus of the baby group to talk about feeding/sleeping and other parental duties with the odd bit of gossip thrown in, or a bit of a moan over lack of partners help, not your sexual identity.

have re read this thread and cant see any homophobic comments at all.

Presumably if you are bi you find people of both sexes attractive? If that is the case why do you feel the need to opt out of fancying a certain celebrity conversations. I don't find every male celeb attractive but as a straight female I DO find certain females attractive.

Confused.

Dizi, do you know who you remind me of ? You remind me of Dafydd, the only gay in the village.

I too, cannot see any homophobic comments on this thread. You, my friend, are oversensitive.

dizi, I think you are according it more importance than it has to other people. I was thinking if one of the other mums at a playgroup said something to me about fancying a woman, I wouldn't be at all taken aback, I wouldn't be surprised and I would simply think "oh, she might be bisexual then. Shall I get another coffee or will that one go cold before I get a chance to drink it as well? oh, look at that child hitting the other one...blah blah...."

I don't think this is just me, people are so liberal these days and there is NO reason that you should feel unable to share your thoughts with them.

Having said that, other mums and I have never had TIME to have a conversation about who we have slept with/fancy, sexuality related things have simply never come up in a playgroup situation and it may not be the most appropriate time anyway, with little toddler ears just waiting to take in these remarks, ready to trot them out to the bus driver or postman at the first available opportunity

Dizie, your baby group isn't like mine if you are discussing sexual identity. We just talk about benal things like lack of sleep/feeding/playing etc etc. Sexual identity is a very personal thing, and something I would discuss with people I know and trust. Do you just want to shock????

Oh Didietzma, get a grip for fucks sake. No one is taking the piss and YOU did post for advice on here FGS. I am going to bed.

Bacardi and Coke and a packet of cheese and onion crips please Myfanwy