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Original poster

Our room, or on its own?

28 replies

CathyL · 27/07/2006 08:33

I have been assuming that for at least the first couple of months baby would sleep in our room to make night feeds easier. Now DH has come in from work saying someone else in the office found that while the baby was in their room every little murmur disturbed their sleep and they had to put it in its own room.
Experience, opinions, comments please......

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PandaBear · 27/07/2006 08:35

Why don't you start off with baby in your room (if that's what you want), and then see if he/she disturbs you. If so, you can re-evaluate then. Everyone's different, and you must do what you feel is right for you!

CurtainTwitcher · 27/07/2006 08:43

With both ds and dd I have kept them in our room for about 8wks and then moved them into their own rooms. I did find I and they slept better in their own rooms but waited until they were more settled of a night as didnt want to trapse all of 3ft to their bedroom in the night especially as both my babies were winter babes. Due again in jan and will do the same.

kayleigh81 · 27/07/2006 10:19

My ds is 12 weeks and he spent his first night in his room last night. He has been in with us in his moses basket but dp gets up at 6am for work which normally disturbs ds.
He did wake up earlier than normal this morning but i think its because i didnt have the blackouot blinds up and his room is really bright.
I think the earlier you put them in there own room the better really so they dont get used to having you with them at bed time.

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2plus2plus1 · 27/07/2006 10:21

Slept in our room at first as that is recommended
(for prevention of cot death I think). Although 6 months is recommended we have moved them all out when they outgrow basket (approx 3-4 months) as we don't room for cot in our room. Having them in your room means you can get to them quicker & not wake whole house (esp. if you have older siblings).

But yes they are noisy little buggers. About once a month leave baby in lounge & sleep on couch (which is actually v v comy) to give dp undisturbed sleep. I slept through all but 3 mins of last nights storm so the little niggles don't tend to disturb me (dp has even been known to wake me when dd needed feeding though).

colditz · 27/07/2006 10:25

When I was pregnant with ds1, I lived in a one bedroom flat and I reasoned I could leave him in the ounge with the baby monitor, I would sleep in the bedroom.

When he actually got here, I wouldn't leave him alone in a room for one second while I went to the toilet in case he got stolen. Someone might see how beautiful he was through the window, and take him to sell him on the internet. I did go a little odd, after the birth of ds1, but a lot of mothers do, so see how you feel before you make any decisions about where baby will sleep.

It is so much easier to have them within arm's reach when they are tiny anyway. Do you really want to be getting out of bed 25 times a night?

TheLadyVanishes · 27/07/2006 10:26

my dd is 13mths and is still in our room however i should add its simply because we are going to get an extension and the spare room is filled with junk. As dd is my first child I was more than happy to keep her in with us for 6mths or slightly longer, now i can't wait for her to have her own room.
2plus2 yes i seem to remember one of my midwives mentioning the cot death to me

2plus2plus1 · 27/07/2006 10:28

Also - when I worry about them I just listen for 5 mins, hear a sigh/moan etc. and go back to sleep knowing they are OK. If I couldn't her them I would probably spend 1/2 the night geting up to check, disturbing dp in the process...

kayleigh81 · 27/07/2006 10:31

2plus2plus1 i was exactly like that last night, ds had first night in his own room and even though its right next to our room, and i could hear him on the monitors i still got up about 10 times to check he was ok
I was the one who didnt sleep through not ds

2plus2plus1 · 27/07/2006 10:33

DD3 getting ready for cot - I am not looking forward to it

harpsichordcarrier · 27/07/2006 10:34

the guidance for reducing the risk of cot death is to have the baby in the room with you until 6 months. The research has shown that babies who sleep close to their parents are at reduced risk of SIDS.
I would say that, if you are feeding more than once in the night then I would not be wanting to get out of bed to go to another room to feed. have you thought of a bedside cot i.e. one that is at the same level as your bed?

LIZS · 27/07/2006 10:34

ds slept in moses basket until about 3/4 months when he largely slept through so we moved him out to the cot in his room . He was quite a noisy sleeper and we found disturbed each other. dd was a much sounder sleeper but had reflux and was unwell at around 3 months. We had a much bigger bedroom then so could fit the cot anyway and she was older, probably around 8/9 months, before we moved her out.

harpsichordcarrier · 27/07/2006 10:36

here's the guidance about reducing the risk of cot death
dd2 is still in with us (8months) - we have a bedside cot and have found it quite useful.

serenity · 27/07/2006 10:45

DS1 - eventually, about a year/18 months?

DS2 - about the same, as we needed to wait for DS1 to be able to go into the top bunk so DS2 could have the bottom

DD - currently 2.8, still in our room as she has no where else to go as she's too much of a pita to settle in with the boys.

IME I was more unsettled when I attempted to put DS1 in his own room than when he was in with us, but DS1 was a terrible sleeper (used to cry constantly between 1am and 4am) and we only resolved it by semi cosleeping (saved my sanity) and we just carried on with that with the other two.

I think this is very much like the other thread on routine - until you actually have your baby there you will have no idea what is go to suit either you or the baby. Don't worry so much about what other people do, go with your first instincts and if it doesn't work try something else

KathyMCMLXXII · 27/07/2006 10:47

She slept in our room till 6 months - we did all sleep better once she was in her own room, but as far as I was concerned it simply wasn't negotiable because of cot death advice. (Then on the dot of 6 months it magically became ok )
Had to put the Moses basket as far away from our bed as we could, though, as I was paranoid about our duvet falling off and suffocating her (?!?)

Iklboo · 27/07/2006 10:52

DA slept in our room until he was about 5 months, then moved into his own room in a cot (mainly cos he'd outgrown his moses basket & there wasn't room for his cot in our room).
He actually started sleeping better in his own room.
They say it's better for baby to spend at least the first few months in the room with you. You'll quickly learn to tell the difference between baby making noises in its sleep and when it wants something.
And if you don't tiptoes round the house all day saying "sshhh, baby's asleep" it'll get used to sleeping with background noise.

Iklboo · 27/07/2006 10:53

- DS, not DA!

pablopatito · 27/07/2006 10:59

DS slept in our room the first night and he was so noisy we hardly got any sleep. So that was it, from the second night onwards he slept in his own room.

JackieNo · 27/07/2006 11:01

Had both ours in with us till 6 months, and by golly it was lovely to get 'our' bedroom back after that!

LemonTart · 27/07/2006 11:06

Both of mine slept in their own room almost from day one. Intended to do the 6 months thing but could not sleep with the snuffling and we woke them up. We decided that we were a non smoking household with healthy children, new mattresses, followed all health and safety advice re bedding and positioning of baby in the cot and that we had a baby alarm, were only next door and so felt it a reasonable risk. Didn?t sleep much for the first night from worry but then ok. Was a great decision in many ways as it gave me one room of sanctuary "adult" space, they never had an issue settling to sleep etc Also, when one had a cold or was unwell, we would bring them into our room so not set in stone.
I would say that it is worth have a space ready in both rooms for a cot/moses basket and let your own experiences and your baby dictate what you feel happiest doing.

LemonTart · 27/07/2006 11:08

My lovely sister (who has recently had a baby) was going to do the 6 months thing - within a week she was pestering her DH to finish the nursery as she couldn?t last another week of jumping up with fright if she heard a murmur - or worse - no murmur

juuule · 27/07/2006 11:29

At 8 weeks old our dd was a near-miss cot death (on her hospital notes). If she hadn't been in our room we wouldn't have known anything until morning when it would have been too late. We didn't have any of the risk factors apart from her being a winter (Feb) baby. So obviously from my experience I would say keep baby in same room as you until 6months.

Dunnyjo · 27/07/2006 11:34

I had my ds1 in our bedroom untill he was a year old (lived in a one bed flat, so had no choice) But now i have my 2bed house i have ds2 who is 9wks in our room in a mosses basket. I intend for him to say there as long as possible because i am deaf i need to be able to hear him. Bad enough at the moment when i wake up to him crying in the morning and i have no ida how long!
Its fine when dh is there but he gets up for work at 5am so its then left for me to deal with. With ds1 dh did the night feeds but with ds2 he has slept through since about 6wks.

LaDiDaDi · 27/07/2006 12:43

I'm keeping dd in our room until she grows out of her moses basket as we don't have room in our bedroom for her cotbed. What usually happens is that she starts off in her basket then when she wakes for a feed I put her in bed next to me and then we co-sleep til morning.

100Vicki · 28/07/2006 14:49

I was horrified when at 7 months pregnant my midwife advised me to let the baby sleep in our room for the first 6 months. However, when my ds was born, my feelings completely changed. My dh was away a lot at first and I loved having the baby in the bedroom with me. In fact I liked it so much that when he got to 9 months and was still sleeping in our room my dh said enough is enough and convinced me to settle him in his own room.

I think you've got to do what feels right for you. My ds is 18months old now and I am 6 months pregnant with #2, I know we'll have a little room-mate again soon, and we won't be putting this one in it's own room until we feel ready. Good luck.

Xavielli · 28/07/2006 15:18

Baby will only disturb your sleep for a few nights, then you will get used to the mumuring and it wont bother you... That what I found anyway.

I havent put mine in another room until they have been sleeping through the night for atleast 2 weeks.

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