Grow old with me! The best is yet to be. Come and join the 40+ mums plus babies, toddlers etc in the snug where tea, cake and sympathy are being served.

[somewherebecomingrain]

We are 40+ mummies sharing all the highs and lows of our autumn crocus babies. Also sharing tips and information (most crying is tiredness!) and jokes. Please join us!

None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely
It's sad to grow old, but nice to ripen.

PS this thread title was created by eagleray, and she also found the quotes.

Hello ladies, hope you don't mind an interloper. I posted on the 40+ pregnancy thread. Both scarecrow22 and blueblackdye kindly suggested I came over here because that thread is so quiet.

I'm 41 and have recently found out I'm pregnant....surprise!! Stupid internet lead me to believe I had more chance of being trampled by a herd of wilderbeast than getting pregnant. I have always wanted children but never met the right man.

I don't really have much of a support system, I'm afraid to tell people before 12 weeks after scaring myself to death with statistics. Doubly stupid internet and stupid me for not stepping away from the laptop! The father doesn't know yet because he's an ex who doesn't want more children...happy days. I'll be 6 weeks tomorrow and I'm driving myself insane, think I might explode before the 9 months are up.

I doubt I'll be able to help with any of your parenting dilemmas but it would be really nice to chat.

Avalon x

Hello Avalon, you are so welcome here! Where are you based? You will find support and kind pro

Sorry, posting too early is my trademark...
...and kind people and RL chat if you need it. And of course

SEE??!!
And of course plenty of virtual snacks and (we'll keep the real for a lot later!)

Welcome Avalon, you found us ! You will get a chance to chat here, sometimes it goes mad and impossible to keep up, sometimes it is quieter. You will also get support, cake and tea from the Egyptian snug where babies when not poorly sleep on their soft clouds or play with their toes while Mummies chat under a warm cristal clear sky.
Of course, you are scared and it is wise to wait the 12 week scan to tell anyone in RL. Stay away from stats.
Oups, will be back, crying A, need to go and check

welcome Avalon, it's lovely to see you here. Back later, but wanted you to feel welcome .

Hi Avalon
Congratulations
I'm currently cuddling my 'it can't happen I'm over forty theory' and she's amazing
Was thinking today that this time last year she was growing away inside me making me feel every shade of shit and i had no idea ;)

Rosebud much improved today and back to her usual happy self. Humdulla
I love this time ofgthe evening feeding her to sleep. Precious gifts these moments.

Thank you all for being so kind! It's so nice to have people to talk to. Off I go crying again....it's been a whole day of crying for no reason.

blueblackdye, I really like the sound of the Egyptian snug. Will try to stay away from stats, keep hoping I'll find something reassuring but it never seems to work that way. I've got a thing going at the moment when I wake up at 5am and start thinking about what could go wrong. I'm guessing that most people go through that.

GoatBongoAnomymous, I'm in North Wales. Loving the idea of virtual snacks, they might save me from the real ones. Feel guilty for scoffing 4 jaffa cakes earlier. Not sure if that makes me a bit of a snacking wimp. Where are you based?

scarecrow22, hello again. Thanks for directing me here.

Sorry if my messages are a bit clumsy, I'll get better.

Hello Avalon. Lovely to have you. Being pregnant is NEVER simple or at least can't think of one of us for whom it was simple. We have all supported each other through it and will have lots of advice.

Rosie, I had the same thought a 10 min ago, feeding A, I don't know when she will decide to stop BFing but I am going to miss it so much. I guess it can happen anytime now, she is 16m in 10 days...
2 years ago, pretty much this week, I started reusing Clearclue ! And now, here she is, my little stunt baby who started blowing kisses with her hand to say bye bye !
Yep, happy days.
DS has been brilliant too today, very sensible, we went to hairdresser after school, then pick up his sister, then bath, dinner, phonics, bedtime story.... I did not need to raise my voice at all. Oh please make this last !
Hope you all get some nice sleep.

LRM, how is Dylan now ? Is he feeling better ?

Hi Avalon lovely to meet you. Welcome to the gang. I crapped my pants when I found out. Gp gave me the impression it was not likely. 6 weeks later hello! !!
Goat how's M?

Any babies starting to walking? The nursery had a physio in today to see another boy and I mentioned to his key worker that baby m cruises around furniture and walls on his tip toes the physio suggests shoes any thoughts ladies. Will take him to gp for referral. He is 14 months so not worried. My mum says I was a toes walker

Shall we redecorate our snug to a lovely Christmas theme. Open fires. Marshmallows and hot choccy. Onies and sleepers for all. My gift to you all is festive sleeping dust for our babies and mixed in a spice of get better dust for those poorly. X

Hi avalon a big hello from me too! All of us here defied those stats. Don't listen to them. Your pregnancy is running along as it should be and your body is giving you no reason to doubt that everything is as it should be. We're here for virtual hand holding whenever you need us . Those first 12 week's are the toughest. It does get easier (though I didn't like pregnancy due to morning sickness, so feel free to have a moan if you don't feel you're glowing)

somewhere thank you for your lovely words .

Bu

Will have to finish post later baby unsettled. Hope all the babies and mums who aren't well have a better more restful night.

Hi somewherebecomingrain. Advice will be very welcome. I thought it would be exciting being pregnant but instead I feel like I'm flipping between not believing it and being afraid something will go wrong. I feel sad most of the time which makes me worry that I'll make my body chemistry unwelcoming some how.

How did you find pregnancy?

Hello, congratulations and welcome Avalon! I was 41 when I had DD at the beginning of the year. Spent my 30s mostly single and as time went on I realised the chances of having children were dwindling. Met DP 4 years ago, and finally got pregnant at 40. Was completely delighted, then soon became anxious/paranoid (didn't help that I was 3 days into a new job when I found out!).

The first trimester felt like it went on forever - all I can say is that I just aimed to get to the end of each day, and then I was one day closer to the scan date. I second the advice of getting an early scan if you can afford it, even if it's just to break up the expanse of time! Post scan, the days became weeks, and then quickly months, and as I started to feel more normal again it was easier to just get on with life.

Oh and please don't worry about your sadness affecting the baby. By all means do avoid stress if you can, but many people I know (myself included) have dealt with major life events while pregnant (bereavement, relationship problems and so on) and the baby was fine.

Anyway, we are here to hold your hand and between us have a wealth of experience and knowledge about having babies after 40.

I'm heading off to bed now. Hot toddy has been drunk, DD woke briefly soon after going to bed but am hoping that's it for a few hours now. My throat is very sore and I feel so tired. Really thought I was going to be going to a job interview this week, but if they rung now I don't think I would pick up the phone!

Hope you all have a very peaceful night with uninterrupted sleep. Night night!

Avalon I felt sht for nine months. Sorry! Though kind of low/mid level rubbish. Good news is firstly you are now statistically more likely to do better than me and secondly I and others are v v v sympathetic to a good vent/ moan somewhere* had good advice about energy supplements which you might seek out later. It is also totally understandable you feel.scared and disbelieving - firstly it's self.protection against something going wrong and secondly terror is the only rational reaction to the prospect of growing, birthing and lifelong responsibility for another human life, especially one that dies not arrive with a pre programmed sleep habit. Talk about it as much as you need. I felt sick.with fear for the first week of my first pg...after which dh took over and panicked until the day of her birth! Talk to us, let yourself think about worries, acknowledge them and let yourself move on, to come back to them at different times. Write them.down even if it helps. Look after your body and you will be doing the best you can for Lo. x

that does not.arrive... bad typo. apologies

Ooh busy on here!

Eagle hope baby eagle is better soon.
Pudding? ? How's things? How's baby pud sleeping now? Rosebud rarely goes more than 3 hours at night still but my body seems to have adapted to sleep deprivation.
Bbd Yay to no raised voice. Your doing a great job. I really believe firm boundaries
are so important as they get older.

Avalon Yay another in team south west.
Do you keep rubbing your tummy and thinking 'wow baby inside'?? I didn't find out i was pg till nearly 11 weeks so missed a lot of the early stress, just thought I'd got some hideous illness that wasn't going away.

Try to be as calm as you can, think positive thoughts and cry whenever you feel like it (I cried lots. .... and lots. ... and lots for ages. everything made me cry. Especially the adverts for animal shelters! !!)

Hello Avalon and welcome! Congratulations. I was 16 weeks when I found out, so I missed all the difficult secret keeping bit! (and loads of tests and a scan!) My miracle baby is just about to wake up for a feed - not only was I 42 when I fell pregnant, but my husband had a vasectomy 15 years earlier so I spent the first 4 months thinking I had a virus or ME or the menopause or something! It is a totally new level of worry. I cried more than usual, although nowhere near as much as I have since he arrived! I'm hoping the hormones will clear off again eventually!

Just popping on to say hi to Avalon! I was 44 when I had DD last December. I have a gorgeous DS who is nearly 10 and we were very happy with one child. Again, thought I was peri-menopausal and that the nausea was a virus but no, I was 8 weeks pregnant. To cut a long story short, we were all initially gutted , but she is amazing and we all love her so much! Totally had the fear. Come on here and vent whenever you want, the other ladies are all amazing. I do read often but don't post much . And if you fancy a nose at some pictures, do join our FB group if you'd like to. PM me with your FB details (if you're on there), and I'll sort it.
Really hope all the poorly babies and mums feel better soon. for all.

avalon don't worry about that. I had raging ante natal depression through both pgs and the youngsters are both cheerful temperaments.

Much more to say but must read others responses!

But completely understand the worry avalon. It's such a profound experience being pregnant. Don't want to whip up worse fears but it is very intense in my experience xx

Just have to share. .... rosebud has blown her first raspberry and now can't stop! ! She has been blowing raspberries for 40 mins her face is covered in bubbly spit. [grjn]