Fantastic 40+ Mums

[Hpbp]

Mum of 2, DS1 nearly 4yo and DD2 almost 11 weeks. I hope to find here advices from experienced mums so that I can avoid mistakes... I made some with DS1 and my life sometimes is hell, it is hard to unlearn wrong behaviour, so hard.
At the time being, DD2 is a very sweet baby, she is easy to decipher, cries are always related to some kind of discomfort and I managed to learn what they mean, or almost. Only one issue with her ATM is that she rejects bottle feeding even with expressed milk. I'd like to be able to escape a bit from the house to get a haircut or a facial. And I am sure DH would like to feed her sometimes too.
I struggle a bit more with DS1, who is usually a good boy, energetic, happy and loving. But after school, getting him to take his bath is a battle and falling and staying asleep all night are big issues. The problems did exist before but now with the recent arrival of his sister, the intensity has increased. Or maybe they are the same but to me they seem bigger and need to be addressed quickly so that I can look after both without raising my voice.
All advice are welcome. I need help here.

Also I'd like to invite all the graduates from the Fantastic 40+ Mums to be thread to join. You have been truly fantastic and so supportive during my pg. I hope to be able to keep on sharing with you this wonderful parenting adventure.

Hi everyone! Just wanted to say all your babies sound lovely - should be joining you all after Monday (ELCS Mon am) - would love to have a nose at the pics if noone minds - is it Midget I should PM my e-mail address to? xx

Hey knotty. Great to hear from you. Bet your excited. I have pm you my email

hi knotty, that's come round quickly! best of luck for Monday, how exiting. pm me email and will send photo
i think we maybe should only send out photos of our own babies unless a mum says its fine?

Good point bytheseaside, will do! Thanks LRM, have got your message, will reply with my e-mail also.

Oh oh oh Knotty, less than 48h to go, looking forward to hearing from you. Will be thinking of you on Mon. How exciting ! A new baby on our thread !
Eagle, your LO looks like you already ! It is amazing what technology can do. Re birth, take water with you, I was so thirsty, a spray would be useful too during labour to refresh your face but also bring moisture to your mouth, hat for baby, a cardigan, a bodysuit, a sleepsuit.
LRM did you get the pic ?

Thanks for all the shopping suggestions! I knew you bunch would be the most sensible people to ask as it is all quite fresh in your minds...

Seaside - I have started my dried fruit/laxative kit already, and will no doubt need to get more pads (am guessing that a pack of 24 will last about half a week!)

LRM - I will defo get some treats in stock as am terrified of the prospect of hospital food (am vegetarian which limits things too). Good idea re cotton wool - that will go on the list for the next shopping trip.

BBD - will stock up on water bottles - I remember someone saying keep one in the freezer so that you have very cold water ready to take with you. I also need to find the tiniest clothes from my collection - am not short on baby clothes thanks to my embarrassing Ebay addiction, but am not entirely sure how many will fit her in the early days!

All of this stuff is going into a giant bag (got a wheeled rucksack that I use for global trips) and then even if I don't leave the house, it is all organised in one place!

I have got DP doing the wood dyeing today - bless him he is clever but not equipped with practical skills. I have given him a tutorial, stuck the mask on his head, and left him to it and decided I cannot be too precious about house stuff as the baby will be here soon to wreck everything anyway

Knotty - oh gosh it is nearly time! Am quite jealous although actually need a few more weeks to get everything in order. Good luck and will look forward to hearing all about it when you re-emerge on the other side!

Knotty. Sending you hugs for Monday. Bet you are so excited. Looking forward to a new little one on the thread.
Ladies I must express my heart felt thanks for the last 11 months. You have all made me laugh. De stressed me. Made me think and supported me through all my ups and downs. It's a pleasure every day to log on and see what everyone is up to and help each other out. A kind word goes a long way so thank you xxxxx

Ooh, knotty very exciting! Good luck!

eagleray Water spray, brilliant when I had DD!

Bbh. Will check email in a few minutes. Baby monkey is making a meal out of his first evening feeds. Wont latch on after coming off the boob after the initial fast flow. I have moved him dozens of times left right left. He is finally full and dropping off to sleep only tAken an hour. My back is killing and I think ewan may go on strike! !!

LRM, a feeding cushion saves my back everyday, I sometimes use it to create a fence when I leave Anastasia for a sec on my bed, she can't roll over yet but just in case it happens !

knotty blimey. Good luck. So close now and can't wait for you to join us properly.

LRM the feeling is very much mutual.

I've just been out to the pub without master Midge. Only lasted 2 hours because my boobs were killing me and I missed him but dr 2 hours I drank wine and didn't smell of puke

Thanks everyone! Looking forward to joining you all on here, and thanks for the lovely photos of your gorgeous children - hoping I can get a nice one of DS with Rosa! LRM, hope the cushion helps your back, I remember that helping a lot with DS. Midget, glad you enjoyed the pub, a break does you good!

Hello, I spring (hahaha if only) back onto the thread after a day in Kent (ooh, I left the borough!!!), the excitement of which left me so knackered that I staggered home and straight to bed, via the feeding of BG who slept the whole way home in the car and woke up sprightly as soon as we walked in the door...

Thank you for the email addresses so far and I will pm mine to you others as well.

knotty all the very very very best for tomorrow! How exciting to know you will be meeting LO so soon!

BG is doing his random calisthenics. Will have to sort him out and return later to read everyone properly.

another night of just not sleeping at all (several in a row now) dont know whether its colic or silent reflux maybe, but cosleeping / feeding to sleep no longer works as baby s seems uncomfortable / cross being put down flat at all - gaah! i'm just soooo tired! all daytime plans keep going out the window as i need to nap and cant really drive in this state. lord knows how we will manage being away at christmas ... please tell me what to do!

Hey bbh. U have gorgeous children. Anastasia is gorgeous.

Bythesea. I feel for you honey. Nothing prepares you for sleep deprevation. They teach you how to breath having a baby but. When you get home ha ha. Prepare for zombie land mixed with more emotional baggage then Heathrow! !!!
When you go away will you get any help? Or can someone help you in the day so u can get some zzzzz
Do you bf totally? If not can someone help with feeds so you can sleep. Can you put her in the Moses basket on the bed during the day and sit up so she can see you

Seaside, so sorry you are having a hard time, I don't know what to say, have you tried feeding followed 30 minutes after by a bath and putting baby down to sleep for the night in a dark room ? Keep everything quiet, very calm... Good luck, at 10/11 weeks they still are very small.
LRM, thanks !
VQ, you have been quiet recently, hope you and DC are doing well.
Midget, I envy your break, I have been home all day, literally, cooking and organising

Good morning ! I think I will stay in bed today, sore throat and runny nose. How can I treat these while BF ?
LRM, baby M has a very cute little nose, and those chubby cheeks, can I have them for tea ?
Knotty, crossing fingers for you and CS today

Bbh. Bummer you have a cold. I had one a few weeks back. Chemist said no drugs or lemsips or stepsils. So took paracetamol. Hot lemonade. Honey and water. And lots of Vaseline around my sore nose. Hope u feel better

Bythesea. How did you all sleep last night? How many weeks old is she now?

Vq and ff. How r u both?

J is nearly 8 weeks and I am so tired. We are having a pj day today. Just coming out of growth spurt I hope, and he is still troubled by his cough, although has not vomited for 48 hours, so feeling happier about that. I feel I am neglecting my girls and feel very sad about that. I am so ratty and have barely any time to spend with them. I feel like I am forever stuck to J, and hope this passes soon. I have never had a Velcro baby, and the girls were sleeping through by now. It is not his fault. He is not well, and has not been well for ages.

DD2 is a very challenging child at the best of times, and DD1 thinks she is a teenager from her behaviour. So much for number 3 just slotting in

It is still very early days. I wish I could postpone Christmas so I could do it properly.

I am ok, just tiredness clouding everything. Hugs to all x

Vq. I have Velcro baby also but not the huge challenge of two others. So u r super women in my eyes. He is getting better which is down to you. The Velcro does wear off a bit my week 10 if it helps. Dont worry about Christmas just try to enjoy it. Get a tin of sweets baby on chest to sleep Christmas film on and relax for a few hours. text some friends to rally round and support u x

I know what you mean Valium Queen. I have only one older kid to look after on top of baby Anastasia and I feel so guilty not to have time to play or look after him. It is not only guilt, I also miss the time, play and contact we had. I feel that I am always rushing him around, in the morning and evening, after an entire day at nursery, there is no quality time anymore. DH has more quality time with DS than I do. Of course I love equally both of them, atm Anastasia needs more attention. I hope when she is less demanding, DS will still want to give me cuddles and kisses !

That was a matter of time, Anastasia also got the cold and we spent a really bad night. From 6pm to 11pm, I fed her and put her down for her to wake up each time. Then again at 3am and 6.30am. Of course now she is sleeping when I have to drop her brother at nursery. Today will be a pj day just like yesterday...

Bbh. Hope Anastasia gets better very quickly. Honey. Sending hugs.
Friend has gone into the labour ward this morning after being induced last Thursday so excited to get a text saying Thomas has arrived. Play chum for baby monkey

Hello everyone.

I have been a little absent. Slight meltdown on sunday, I was so tired after the three weeks that BG had his cold. If I can make it to Sunday night DH will take him for the night and I will get my first night in five months. I can't wait.

bbd sorry to hear about Anastasia's cold. Hard for both of you. A pj day is exactly what is on prescription. lrm Excitingnews abut your friend ( although at length of induction)
seaside you poor thing. As lrm says, can someone help with feeds? Is there a breastfeeding support group you can go to to see if they have any suggestions at all? You can't go on indefinitely like this. I did find one fab group, a little late for me, but they are out there if you are able to shop around a bit!
vq as lrm says you are superwoman having three children to deal with. You could go Russian Orthodox and have Christmas on January 6, but failing that, make everyone else do the work and take the sweets and duvet day option. I have had one Christmas like that onmy life and it was one of the two best I have ever had.
Bg's gran in NZ has finally seen him (via Skype). Of course she is besotted and think he is the cutest and most advanced baby ever naturally she is right!

to all these bastard germs making early motherhood so much harder. I also have a stinking cold (HP maybe they poisoned us at the booking office?). I can't move without my nose pouring - gross. VQ I want to pop on the overnight sleeper and take that boy for you just for an hour or so. I think all of us with kids understand how hard it is. The guilt, the only having one pair of hands and the sadness at missing time with our older DC's added into the exhaustion is a heady mix.

to baby goat and his obsession with household goods. And welcome baby Thomas, play thing for baby monkey.

So far Midge is just a bit snuffly so hope he doesn't get this full on cold. His sleep isn't great anyway at night so don't need any added problems just in time for Christmas.

Must stop whining. Master Midge being so darn cute right now. Natures way of stopping us putting them in cupboards.