Back in the Zoo for new adventures with old friends

[CaptainNemo]

Come on over animals, I think we'll be very comfy here

Guess who has a new netbook? I'm back to annoy you all again.

But right now, I've had too many glasses of wine to talk sense mwah

Moomin Hows the head?

HEYYYY MOOMIN!! welcome back!!

Fine actually. Im sitting in the garden. There seems to be this yellow thing shining in the sky
I need to have a big catch up!

Welcome back Moomin, lovely to see you . What is your news ?

Buddha so sorry AF arrived, it is so rubbish isn't it, especially when you thought you were in with a good chance .

Hurray for the 3 of us being cycle buddies , I suspect with my wonky AWOL eggs I'll be testing about a week after you ladies (assuming you both have 28 day cycles). We can SWI and symptom spot together

I spoke to acupuncturist about shortened LP and he did not think it was an issue - he said some ladies have 8 high temps, others have 15 and it makes little difference to chance to getting PG. I told him about my imp bleed and he didn't seem to think it was relevant - pretty sure he thinks I'm a nutter now ! He started banging on about corpeus luteum but not sure exactly what he meant - communication can be a struggle ! I now have 3 bags of herbs per day - he quizzed me about AF and was not impressed that it was bright red and had clots so said I need more herbs to deal with this 'issue' FFS ! I have some to dry fry, then add to the ones I boil into a 'tea' then I have powdered ones to swallow (they taste like cinnamon so quite tasty actually). I think I have developed a taste for these crazy, stinky herbs, I don't mind them as much anymore which is just as well as my kitchen stinks of them permanently ! The lengths us ladies go to in order to fall pregnant !

Nemo how are you feeling mrs ?

Marbles Think I forgot to congratulate you on your new job, clever girl hope your first day went well
Murray Oh my I don't like the sound of your herbs, I only just about remember my folic acid I'd be hopeless at anything else. How did the visit to your friend go?

I've decided I'm going back to Chubb club after my birthday, give me something else to concentrate on rather than ttc well that's the plan anyway! Maybe I can get distracted losing weight and then put it on for an entirely different reason

How come some people just don't get the whole "I want a baby" scenario?
I just mentioned to my mum who works with me that I was sick to death of all these youngsters coming in announcing they're pregnant etc. her reply " well you've got one!"
Both myself and my sister were mistakes and unplanned so she's never been broody. I felt like I was on aibu so I've come for some reassurance
I'm not being unreasonable am I?

Buddha you are most definitely NOT alone - I completely understand. It is perfectly reasonable to feel that way about PG announcements when you so desperately want one yourself.
Also, the urge to have #2 is really strong as it is for your DC as much as yourself (well in my case anyway). I really don't want him to be an only child, it breaks my heart to think he may be lonely growing up if I can't give him a sibling.

I was actually going to pop on with some 'top tips' I have gathered in my latest trawl of research into fertility. None of it is rocket science or scary and it fits well with your plans to lose weight Buddha. Basically the top foods which help fertility and MC avoidance are:
peppers
grapefruit (this apparently really helps)
broccoli, cauliflower, spinach, kale, bok choy
salad leaves, radish
oats, flaxseed (I mix ground flaxseeds in with my porridge)
nuts & seeds (esp brazil nuts)
milk and cheese
and as far as possible eat everything bran/wholemeal/organic

Avoid transfats and refined sugar. So, there we are my guide to getting PG with the side benefit of losing weight in prep for getting fat !!! simples

Also, taking a conception multivit is highly recommended - I don't but then I take most of what is in those multivits individually .

Buddha have you considered acupuncture ?... I know I am biaised because I am doing it and I have to believe it is making a difference but I ahve been doing a lot of reading up on its effects on fertility and it is quite amazing - esp for women in their 40s (sorry !) who have been told that they have no chance and tried several rounds of IVF then they try acupuncture and bingo !
I know it is a big step and I will have put you off with my herb chat but maybe something worth considering if it doesn't work naturally (not that acupuncture is unnatural ifkwim !) over the next few months. However, hopefully once you have followed my genius diet above you will be bursting full of baby in no time !

Where is everyone else, Marbles how is your job ? Moomin where's your chat ?... Nemo how you feeling mrs ? Kat had a baby yet ?

evening ladies

buddha i agree! you are most deinitely NOT alone i have learned to ignore the "what dya need another baby for?" comments and the "when are you going to have another?" and the "its selfish to allow a child to stay an only" aswell the urge to have a baby is stronger once you have one already IMO...you have the biological push to have a baby, the logical push for a smaller age gap etc, the emotional push for you, your DS, your DH to add to your lovely family...its so much more acute when you know what you are aiming for (DISCLAIMER: in no way am i saying its not hard going for your first we ALL know it sucks big time)

murray do you play a tune when you walk? you need to change your name to gomaracas i too am rattling!i am on my normal meds (asprin and thyroxine) and im also taking 2 agnus castus per day (it should be 2 morning and 2 night but mood swings ahoy so i cut back) vitamin D3 spray, 2 vit B complex and folic acid...i really notice the difference if i miss a day too... how are you? getting geared up for BD time?

hello to everyone else lurking

i started my new job today it went so well!! i am so happy with it! it is unfortunately a short term contract but it will be FANTASTIC CV fodder i will hopefully get something longer term from this aswell if not in the same office

Hello all

Congrats on the new job Marbles I'm so glad it's going well, about time something went your way! How's DD? It sucks that her appt is on your 30th but I would have done exactly the same in your position. What time is it? Is there any chance you can do something nice with her afterwards or will you have to rush straight back to work?

Buddha at all the insensitive comments. What is wrong with people?!? As soon as it has anything to do with pregnancy or childbirth people seem to think they have the right to comment, maybe because they were children themselves once so they think they know what they're talking about?! You may have seen from my fb satus a while ago I was getting pretty sick of all the comments about my size. A friend who's a couple of weeks behind me had a great conversation with a shop assistant the other day:
Shop Girl: how many weeks have you got to go?
My friend: another 7 weeks
Shop girl: wow you're MASSIVE!!
My friend: yeah, that's incredibly rude
Shop girl: oh, sorry, I didn't mean to be rude
My friend: well you were.
Good for her I say!!

On the topic of acupuncture, I'm still having it but not as much as I'd like/I should due to the cost - £45 an hour.... I was meant to have an appt tomorrow aft but I've cancelled it due to lack of childcare and lack of funds - I went on a spa day with a friend on Monday (which was GLORIOUS!) and ended up buying a load of new make up brushes, so all future spending has had to be curtailed... Though saying that, I'm off to John Lewis to be measured for bras later then I'm going o do the big Boots/Mothercare shop which I doubt will be cheap Bad Nemo.....
Anyway, what I was going to say was that I'm pretty sure the success rate for women doing ivf with acupuncture is significantly higher than those without, so I really do think there's something to what murray's saying.
Have you thought about drugs like clomid to help ttc? Would you consider talking to your gp about it? Especially if you're worrying about your age being a factor as well. Just a thought.

Kat good luck for your appt on Friday, you seem to have had very mixed messages from the hcp's about what they think is best for you.... Although saying that, I suppose I have too.... Sorry I can't come along with you, do you have a friend who might be able to come? I hope you're not going to have to take DD?

So here's my (current) irrational worry. I'm really worried that I'll struggle to bond with a massive baby who doesn't look like a newborn.... Photos of 10-11lb babies terrify me. Especially if he does me loads of damage on the way out.... I don't want to skip the newborn phase, I mentioned to my gp that I hadn't bought any newborn clothes and she said good plan but he prob won't be in 0-3 for long, best get some 3-6!!! I know it sounds awful but I'm really worried about having some freak show child who's outgrown his Moses basket by the end of the first week.... Does that sound horrendously ungrateful? I know how lucky I am to be having another baby at all, but this size thing is really freaking me out....
In other news, I emailed the doula and told her thanks but no thanks. She emailed back saying that was absolutely fine and she totally understood, it was a really nice email, and I thought yippee! Sorted! But then I got a voicemail from her saying she's extremely concerned about me and she really wants to talk to me.... I just can't face it. I've managed to avoid her so far, though she's emailed again. I'm such a moron, I should just get it over with then I could stop worrying about it.....

Right. Better get in the shower, am making the most of my child free day, I have an eye test and a contact lens check up before my bra fitting appointment - you can't say I don't know how to live!!

Love to all, to those I haven't mentioned and the lurkers (come back soon, we miss you!) xx

Just popping by to say been in early labour for 24 hours+ being kept in hosp due to big baby/previous section. Contractions stopped last night, so they will prob break waters/give a teeny bit of hormone drip and failing that section today!! :) wish me luck

Being sent home :(

Kat How exciting good luck
Murray Thanks for good advice I'm going to write down the foods you've suggested thankfully there's lots I already eat.
Nemo Hope you didn't spend too much on bras!! I can't believe your doula is hassling you, she knows your feeling anxious so that's just downright mean! I am sure you will love your little boy regardless of his size but you did make me laugh with your worries

Thanks for reassuring me that I'm not being unreasonable. Unfortunately the third person who was trying at work (my boss) has told me today she's pregnant. Queue floods of tears from me she also told me that there are 2 others I don't know about yet who will be going public shortly - I don't want to work here anymore

Have they sent you home with a plan of action?

Ladies ! So much chat

Kat how awful being sent home, but surely it will be in the next day or 2 (which probably seems like forever given you had your sights set on today), keep us posted xx

Nemo you are hilarious with your constant worrying ! Of course you will love your baby - even if he is 10lb he will still be tiny and all curled up and beautiful and he'll be YOURS ! You will love him to bits, stop being so mental ! Just call the doula back and see why is she is worried or email her and ask her - don't let it stress you out.

Buddha oh no that is so tough for you that everyone else just seems to be falling PG at the drop of a hat. I totally understand . I know it sounds hard but please try to stay as positive as possible. I cannot tell you how much importance my Acupunturuist puts on not getting down/negative/stressed/anxious. He says it can play havoc with your hormones and does nothing to aid pregnancy. Keep your chin up, your time will come mrs and when it does it will be the right time for you.
Here is one of the sites I have been reading about acupuncture and fertility - maybe give you some things to consider:
www.the-fertility-acupuncturist.com/
Also, the one about vitamins and foods to take to help get PG and avoid MC is here:
sites.google.com/site/miscarriageresearch/
Apologies if you are not the type of person who likes to read too much about a subject (I am !) just ignore it if you are .
The websites may give you some ideas about steps to take to help out - I know that it helps me stay positive knowing that I am doing all that I can . Chin up mrs, I know it is hard xx

Well my news is that I went to see my friend and her teeny baby today - he is sooo cute ! It all went very well - no tears until I was leaving - when she told me that when her DS was born that they told her that he had a very long cord - at that point she burst into tears, which set me off briefly. However, it was so good to hear that a long cords doesn't mean the end - very positive indeed , so I am even more boosted by that info. Plus I am bursting full of fruit, veg and vitamins, never been healthier ! I am determined that I will maintain a PMA this cycle and hope that it helps. Also, cuddling a newborn is supposed to make you fertile (Old Wive's Tale) but I'm happy to think of it as a good omen .

Moomin you tempted us with chat then disappeared - where are you ?

Murray I believe that about holding a newborn! :)

buddha no plan just a prick of a dr contradicting everything said by drs the night before!

My back is killing me, baby is back to back 3/5 in pelvis, I'm at least 2cm dilated and cervix is anterior and very soft and stretchy, unusually so apparently but im home because my contractions weren't painful enough!!!! Surely thats relative, I have a high pain threshold!! The drs I saw last night said they would help progress the labour but the dick I saw this morning said he wouldn't interfere regardless of baby's size I truly believe the difference was last night I saw women, today, a man! I'm so sorry to rant, please skim this I just needed to vent :(

Kat sorry the Dr was a prick! IME alot of male Drs are the same...if they had to do it (labour and childbirth) they would have figured out a way we would have to do it i would walk up and down the stairs a few times...go for a brisk walk, have some pineapple and hot curry...(ever helpful me) OR sit down and have a nice rest if you can {{{hugs}}}

:)

Kat not much I can add to Marbles comprehensive list of good advice. Please feel free to rant, you are very entitled to as this situation sucks. However, it is soo exciting knowing that it is all happening either now or very soon - GOOD LUCK xx

Kat sorry to hear things aren't progressing as you would hope, fingers crossed for some action today!! How frequent/intense are the cntractions you're having? Good luck with that high pain threshold btw, I'm sorry but that did make me How many weeks are you today? Will you still go to your appointment today or have events rather overtaken that now?

Murray am in awe of your PMA, you're doing so fantastically well! You're so strong to go and see your friend and her newborn, it would have been very easy to hide yourself away (which is probably what I would have done ) and I'm glad you found some comfort in knowing that long chords and negative outcomes don't have to go together.

Buddha I think for me finding out the news of other people's pregnancies was the single hardest thing post mc, especially for people who just seemed to fall at the drop of a hat.... I'm afraid I have no real words of wisdom but if there's anything I can do you kow where I am, and I hope all the support from mn is helping too. >

So news from here is that. Had my 36 week mw appt last night (36+3 today). Despite the fact that the baby's head was only 1/5 palpable (so 4/5 in pelvis) I was still measuring 2weeks big for dates (the baby being so low should make you measure smaller as the measurement doesn't include most of his head...). She reckons we're def looking at double figures weight wise.... She suggested I ask the consultant to give written permission for the mw's to do an early sweep so I'm going to call him today and see what he thinks... He'll prob say no... She also suggested lots of sex, with it specifically focusing on me having a good time!! I told her i wasn't sure that was physically possible, and DH was a bit when I told him, but give him his due, he stepped up to the plate (as it were ) and put his talents to good use last night . However, for a while I thought it might have actually done the trick, I ended up being up tip about 2 feeling v twingy but no contractions. Feel like crap today, but still no contractions, just sort of sore and v uncomfortable. Sadly no show or other promising sign...
Am meant to be packing my hosp bag today as we're off to spend a few days at my parents place in Dorset on Sunday (plus going to a wedding on sat) so I figured I ugly to take a bag with me, just in case. Am looking forward to having DH to help with DD though part of me is (irrationally) a bit worried about going as its 45 mins to the nearest hosp which is my mother's helpful comments about me having a 2 hour labour this time round are right, is rather too long...
Anyway. Enough rambling.

Good luck Kat if you're reading this!!

Have I killed the thread?!?! Where'd everybody go.....??

Nemo do you still have c sec on your notes? If so keep it there it would seem that getting them to agree to it at a later date is impossible!!!! At least then you will have a choice. Im 38 weeks 3 days now and still home in discomfort.

'tightenings' are every 15 min sometimes 5 tthey wake me up so I'm exhausted, they get very strong with movement/walking or should I say waddling, but will not increase in intensity! I am sure this is due to baby being back to back and head too far from cervix due to size that there's not enough pressure. Had a sweep and dr said it was happening so wouldn't book c sec there's 2 week wait. I got fobbed off and just want to cry!!!! :(

ooo looks like we will have a new member in the zoo very soon then kat if you can, sit straddling a chair watching Tv to encourage the baby to move position- i did this with DD and she moved round to being on the left hand side rather than back to back. it might help move things along so you get a VBAC but without the BTB part of it

hope everyone is doing well...

new job is GREAT im excited for wrk on a daily basis!! makes a difference!!

A 2ww for a c section?!? The world's gone mad!! Hope things get moving for you v soon Kat, if they haven't already... At least at 38.5 weeks LO shouldn't be too huge...

Marbles am so pleased you're enjoying the new job, about time something went yor way! Really hope this is the start of a whole new positive trend for you.

News from here is... No news

Evening ladies ! Just popping in to see if there is a new baby yet. Hopefully no news from Kat means it is all happening or has happened already .

Marbles ditto what Nemo said - so glad you are enjoying your work, long may it last. Maybe your luck is about to turn - I really hope so.

Like Nemo no news from here - feeling good, taking my stinky herbs and eating fruit and veg by the truckload. About to start the 'fun bit' - hurray !