dd up & down out of bed constantly

[bourneville]

Grrrrr just need moral support with this.
DD (2.4) changed to a bed a week ago, and the first couple of nights were tough. I used to sing Five Green Bottles every night before putting her down, on the 2nd night I decided to stop doing this as it is of course positive attention, and did the silently returning her to bed thing. At 5am I was doing it for an hour and a quarter! But it worked, she got out of bed once the night after because she fell out of it, but not again until last night, when my boyf was over just before bedtime, which of course is all very exciting!
Silent treatment wasn?t working (for all of 10 mins but my boyf was getting v jittery by then esp as it was my birthday), so we ended up using the naughty mat, he tried once too, which of course didn?t work at all. In the end what worked was a real threat that her doggy (security teddy) be taken away, having taken it once, she came out distressed, I gave it back, then she didn?t leave the bed till 5:15am but went back again ok ? albeit screaming!
I am v v pissed off at having to break the pattern of what?s supposed to happen, as tonight I have decided to stop Five Green Bottles and have a bedtime story instead, all went v well, but she has been in & out constantly for 15 mins now? all I am doing is literally walking even behind her back into her room, not even looking at her, and shutting the door, not even putting her in bed? She has started giving a cry when I leave her there now, but comes straight out?
Does this mean it?s starting to work? How long can I expect this to go on for and will it be every night?
She just said ?Lie down? ? she wants me to lie her down like I originally was & is screaming when I don?t. Should I lie her down? Aggh grrr! Bloody p?d off that last night happened the way it did? bloody boyfs!!!

Cod are you my mother n disguise? I do wonder sometimes....

It was Supernanny I saw it on. She is banging on the door now & then but not opening it so I will leave her. Don't want to creep in & check later tbh, she can just stay on the floor!!! I haven't crept into her room for months & months so don't want to risk waking her up if she is asleep.
Do realise though that i said there would be no stickers/choc unless she "stayed in bed", which she obviously hasn't! hm...maybe there should be no stickers or choc tomo even if i don't go in to her now?

followthestarlover - I was up & down with her for an hour and a half the 2nd night at 5am but there were no problems after that, so I think the inconsistency of last night has really stuffed it up.

Ridiculous how complicated/hard work these things are! No wonder people end up getting into bed with their kids or having nightmare bedtime routines.... NEVER NEVER NEVER! not for me!!

Hi everyone. DD didn't get up till 8am this morning! She is v tired poor thing. For all I know she might have slept on the floor...

OK so this is tonight?s strategy and forever after. (Felt I had to write it down to be clear for myself!). Can anyone see any flaws in it?:-
I will put dd back first off with a stern ?Stay in bed? command. After the 3rd time I will tie a rope from the door to the coat hook which means she will only be able to open it slightly. (This suggestion I read in a book).Hence not actually shutting her in (she will still see the light, me etc outside the door) and will say to her ?dd must go back to bed and stay in bed, and Mummy will then say night-night and shut the door.? I will then leave her be (probably screaming) for 2 minutes, come back and repeat after 2 minutes, until she gives up. I think I should be increasing the amount of time each time? -3, 5, 7 mins etc? If she does return to bed I will then say night-night and shut the door.
Not sure what to do if she then attempts to get out of bed again ? I think the rope needs to still be attached otherwise she can come out and it will reinforce the idea that it?s worth her while getting out of bed again? At the same time, I don?t want her to think she?s permanently shut in there? Should I say ?If dd goes back to bed, Mummy will take off the rope and shut the door.? But make sure she?s clear that if she tries to open the door it?s back again? It would kind of be fair enough for her to check wouldn?t it ? otherwise she would just have to trust that I would take it off. (Btw this is a mixture of the rope thing plus another thing I read about, to do with shutting the door if the child gets up, and then opening the door if the child stayed in bed. That of itself wouldn?t work for dd cos the door has always been shut ? and of course she can open it herself!) The rope thing by itself involves just going back as I said after progressively longer periods of time, like cc, to reassure that you?re still there, as well as reinstate that they?re to go back to bed. But I feel I need some sort of consequence for her to work with as she completely ignored my orders last night! Also, she would think she was shut in her room all night too.

Oh it?s all so confusing and complicated, sorry guys! I want to use the rope cos it means she doesn?t get the fun games she had last night, running around & having me put her back to bed, it?s more like controlled crying which I used when she was 6 months old. Plus it?s more peaceful for me, not having to yo-yo! Last night I got so hot & sweaty! She has always been so good at going to sleep, she chats away to herself/to doggy for a while so I know her getting up has nothing to do with feeling insecure etc.

Ok well any suggestions would be helpful!