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Original poster

October Babies

229 replies

pie · 12/10/2003 06:52

Not sure if anyone else is ready to join me here yet...bells, woodge???

Been up since 4am, please tell me that I'm not the only one!!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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bluebear · 23/01/2004 12:46

As long as I don't spend whole evening on Mumsnet that is!

Original poster
pie · 23/01/2004 12:50

You must spend your evening online then!

OP posts:
bluebear · 23/01/2004 12:54
Smile

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bluebear · 23/01/2004 12:55

BTW I'm a psycopath according to the other thread, you may want to think twice before 'talking' to me!

bluebear · 23/01/2004 12:55

Can't believe I spelt that wrong!!!

Original poster
pie · 23/01/2004 12:56

I saw that, but I'm not posting my result

OP posts:
bluebear · 27/01/2004 15:26

How are you all then? Are all the babies sleeping through Tegan is getting over her cold at last..has been feeding every 2 hours day and night and has been sleeping in my arms... she is not impressed with the idea of returning to the cot.
Have still not managed to get her to take EBM from a bottle and am really doubting my ability to breastfeed her (think this may be linked to re-emergence of scarey depression symptoms).
Dh is too supportive...would rather I persevere with EBM than try formula..but I am on verge of buying some..at least if it ends up down the sink it won't feel so bad..also will only need to sterilise bottles, not pump.
We have less routine now than at 3 weeks.. aiming to rectify this soon, but her habit of sleeping till 10am has been useful when ds has had me up at 3am.

Oakmaiden · 27/01/2004 20:25

I'm feeling really sad.

Original poster
pie · 27/01/2004 20:27

why? are you ok?

OP posts:
Oakmaiden · 27/01/2004 20:28

I don't know why - I'm just feeling really bad at the moment. I don't know what to do with myself. I think I looked down...

Original poster
pie · 27/01/2004 20:32

Oh oakie did anything start this feeling?

OP posts:
Oakmaiden · 27/01/2004 20:40

I don't think so - I have been so determined that it wouldn't be like it this time. That this time it would be OK and I would enjoy it. But for a few weeks now I have felt like the abyss has been yawning at my feet - but that it will be OK as long as I don't look down.

But I thik I must have. I bloody HATE this. I HATE being a parent - I hate feeding her, I just hate the whole lot. I keep fantasising about jumping off something very tall - or drowning. I can feel my hair float out in the water.

I'm trying so hard.

Original poster
pie · 27/01/2004 21:39

I had no idea you were feeling so bad, please if you ever want to talk let me know. Sorry I seemed to disappear but the baby was freaking out. EVERYTHING you just wrote I have felt too. Please please let me know if there is anything I can do.

pie(at)sabian(dot)net

OP posts:
bluebear · 28/01/2004 19:09

Oakie.. me too.. can relate to everything you've said.. and am having a bad week again (after a few weeks in the sunshine).
Contact me via the contact another user if you want to talk.
Keep talking.. it does help
Keep looking up, take it one day at a time.
Didn't know you had it last time as well... you recovered then.. you will again.

Are you getting much sleep/rest? Are you remembering to eat?

Original poster
pie · 28/01/2004 19:27

oh bluebear, I sorry things aren't good for you either at the moment...please feel free to contact me at the address below as well.

pie xx

OP posts:
bluebear · 28/01/2004 19:30

thanks pie, dd windy, got to go

Spod · 28/01/2004 20:36

oh dear... sorry to hear you are all feeling so low... i cant imagine what PND feels like.... I do feel for you all. I should never have mentioned 'goes 6 hours at night' ha ha ha ha ha!! hasnt done that since!!! 3 hours, 4 hours maybe....buggar! although she was kind to me on monday....slept for 7 hours before waking...was so grateful as I'd been to my grandads funeral that day. Shes getting better at napping in the day (after weeks of practically sleepless days) So some progress....altho she cant manage more than 40 mins. But we're doing just fine. Have still not really slotted into a routine... not much point as should be moving house next week (been saying that for 10 weeks)hope things brighten up for you guys though. take care... ps husband trapped in snow....been gone for 5 hours and he's only about 5 miles away.....poor thing

bluebear · 29/01/2004 00:21

hey, my dh trapped in snow too - at airport, waiting for flight... 5 hour delay but thinks he'll be flying anyway
Can't sleep... despite both babes sleeping.. grr!

bluebear · 29/01/2004 00:32

The last few nights dd has woken every 2 hours for snuggle and feed, then wakes up when put back in her bed.
Tonight i got her ready for bed and put her into my bed - result - she's been blissfully asleep ever since - on the other hand I have raging insomnia and a hellish day tomorrow, with getting toddler to nursery (do you think anyone will comment if I go in my PJs), counselling (don't want to talk...), and a fridge engineer to hang around for.... such is my exciting life.

Oakmaiden · 29/01/2004 12:40

I had quite a good night last night! I finally gave in - can't kid myself, I am NOT a perfect other - and gave her a bottle of formula at 11pm last night. She struggled with it to start with (it had a variable teat on) drinking just 1oz for about 30 minutes worth of sucking, then I changed the teat to a newborn one and she polshed off the bottle (7oz) in another 10 minutes. And then slept all night - I didn't need to feed her until 7:30 this morning.

Which is what I hoped would happen - when I breastfeed her in the middle of the night I think she is too tired, cos she falls asleep quite quickly (before she is full?) but the bottle was obviously easier.

I am trying to persuade myself that it doen't count because I would rather she didn't feed in the night at all - so a bottle of formula then doesn't change anything? I'm trying to convince myself.

Mind you, I went to the HV yesterday to try to tell her how I am feeling - al she really said was "Why not stop breastfeeding?". Because the guilt would make me feel worse, perhaps?

bluebear · 29/01/2004 12:52

If one bottle of formula each evening gives you a break, good sleep and therefore increases your chance of breastfeeding all the other feeds it sounds like a great idea to me!
I have been trying to persuade dh that it wouldn't be the end of the world if dd had a little formula - I am getting very down with trying to express (and all the sterilising/washing up palaver that it entails), and getting every bottle rejected (she's biting/sucking everything, clothes, toys, hands, but will not suck a teat). Sometimes dh is a bit too supportive of my breastfeeding (also not supportive of me trying to lose weight until I give up bfeeding - he loves me for who I am..... bit perfect my dh!)
I skipped counselling this morning due to lack of sleep and inability to talk without crying... and now I feel better! Have actually managed to put the washing on, do washing-up, and dust -dust!! Dd has never seen such activity...
Dd is latching, pulling off so I squirt milk everywhere, crying, then doing it again and again...any ideas anyone? I calm her down and try to feed again, and off she goes again.. going to try feeding lying down next... (Tried winding her, and I'm pretty certain she's hungry)

bluebear · 29/01/2004 13:21

Gave up trying to feed her - put her down on playmat, she fell asleep almost instantly..... I don't know what I'm doing with this baby ... She doesn't seem to have read the manuel!

bluebear · 30/01/2004 16:07

well, got 7 hour gap between feeds last night, although I only slept for 5 or those hours.. better than the 3 hours sleep I had the night before..

Scared the S* out of dh this morning.. He had a hell of a time chasing ds round the house, trying to dress him and pack for nursery, and grumpily pulled the duvet off me before he left and yelled at me to get up (I keep intending to get up in the morning so that dd will get her daylight hours sorted but I feel like hell). He left with ds, and then rang the house to apologise... In the meantime I had managed to sob my way through a shower, but then fed dd on the bed and fell asleep again... 2 hours later and 15 unanswered calls on home phone and mobile.. I dragged myself out of bed and phoned dh to find that he had driven home from work expecting to find an ex-wife if YKWIM... Now feeling incredibly guilty as I had been thinking of taking an overdose this morning.. but I couldn't work out what to do about dd, and then I fell asleep.
Guilt, guilt, guilt, I really messed up dh's day, and I am so tired and miserable... want a magic pill to take it all away.

bluebear · 02/02/2004 12:43

dd now not put on any weight for 4 weeks - took her to clinic this am (first time since december) and have been advised to supplement with bottles (with the sub-text of 'stop breastfeeding' - she won't take bottles (have been trying all sorts over the last few weeks) so am having a 'feed the baby' marathon.... trouble is - she doesn't seem hungry.
Stupid HV even mentioned weaning - as if a bit of no-calorie carrot mush would help her put weight on!

Spod · 02/02/2004 21:33

bloody hv!