Do You Let Your 13yo Son Play 18-rated Xbox Games?

[CDMforever]

my 13yo son has asked me to put this question on Mumsnet.
Weeeeell?????

Well she is 11.
So as far as age rated games/films etc are concerned she does not make the choice, I do.
I expect her to respect my rules, particularly since they are fair and reasonable.

HIMALAYA -

"id hope he would have better things to be doing than being brainwashed and sat there like a zombie playing some stupid video game"

this particular quote wasn't directed at my son's friends....? it was directed at any child who's parents allow them to sit and play these games rather than do something pro-active!

The "cant be assed" quote is the same, none of my friends do allow their children to do this, my son is only 6 so thats his age range, again it was directed at the people who really cannot be assed with their children and so letting them play these games is a better option than interacting with them.

I think a lot of you have taken my post the wrong way. I'm not saying it's okay to let a 13-year-old play 18-rated games, because in 99% of cases it isn't. But it frustrates me that on half the threads on the topic I see here on MN (and I get people saying it in real life too) there are individuals who spout nonsense about how gaming is "bad" and just do a blanket ban on all 18 games, or indeed games in general, without judging each one and how you think your child would deal with it.

Take Dragon Age II, for example - rated 18 (I just checked).
There's the odd swearword. It's a bit bloody, but in most cases you're fighting monsters anyway - plus you can turn off persistent gore. There's "scenes of a sexual nature", but that consists of cheesy cutscenes that don't show anything below the collarbone, and can also be ignored if you don't bother romancing anyone.
I don't see why it's an 18, but it is. I wouldn't have blinked an eye at any of the content had it been released when I was 13.

My brother (currently 17) plays games of any age rating and has done since he was about 14 - because my mum knows how mature he is as an individual, and can then vet games accordingly. This is the point I was trying to drive at - parents who aren't gamers tend to put too much emphasis on the rating, without actually looking into it themselves. Personally, I think that's lazy. Just as lazy as those parents who just blindly hand out any game the child asks for.

Babybumbx - sorry, I didn't mean to quote you out of context. I just meant that when your 6 year old gets to an age where their peers are playing video games, if you dismiss their friends as brainwashed zombies and the other parents as negligent/uncaring it's not really the basis for a mitually respectful discussion and it may well backfire on you if they can see their friends are neither brainwashed or zombies but just enjoying a hobby which you don't approve of.

I understand where your coming from, i'm coming from the point where parents allow their children to play "inappropriate" games, whether it be for hours on end or a limited time.

There is nothing wrong in the family taking part in Wii sports, or friendly gaming but i certainly disagree with anything that contains violence, drugs, prostitutes, stealing etc.

I guess coming from experience working with young offenders, children in care etc....alot of these children have been allowed to play these endlessly with no adult supervision, conversation or understanding. My feelings are that i'd prefer my son to not play these games, I know when he's playing his DS you cant get a blink out of him, they are completely fixed and numb looking, I know when I was used to play them as a child, I would be a at the time of playing a "brainwashed zombie" playing inappropriate games.

I'm having this debate too with my 11 year old and inclined to let him play some 18 games. How do you know which ones though? Its a nightmare. I feel absolutely torn between being a good parent and a bad one.

Hmmm its a topic that clearly evokes strong opinion on both sides! My DH and I are both gamers and when Halo first came out we played it through co-operatively. We tend to game together COD and MOH and some of the racing games. I did let my 12 year old play Halo and other 15 & 18 rated games but we played together or he played in the lounge where I was in and out, often giving excellent unwanted advice on how to play He played online with mates and I did listen in as I too have heard some totally inappropriate language\conversations on line. My son is now nearly 18.. He has a job, goes to college and is lovely (mostly) we don't game anymore as I now have a DC3 and DC 6mths and apart from no time, it really isn't appropriate. My DS plays Mario Kart !? online in his room occasionally but that's about it. My DD now 14 has never been interested. I wouldn't allow anyone elses child to play games rated above their age in our house.. That's not my parenting decision to make.

This is an old debate in my house. My son is 13 and I have reluctantly let him play some (pre-vetted) 16+ games but he is not allowed any 18+ games. He claims that he is the only one of his friends with this restriction but I know from talking to other parents that this is not the case and suspect there is a far amount of fibbing going on amongst his friends. If you let them play 18+ games you can't revoke that privilege very easily. I don't like 'shoot em up' games anyway and try to steer him towards strategy based games. It is really hard to police though.

Thank goodness for mums like mummyloveskisses and ladypeterwimsey (great name) who've got some SENSE. It doesn't take a genius in child psychology to realise that age 12/13 is a CHILD and there is quite a big difference between a child and an adult of 18 or over, which is why....wait for it....these games have a certification. It's to guide you that these games are NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN!!

And don't give me that stupid argument that 'my son is not in a knife/gun wielding gang' rubbish. That doesn't mean it's not doing them any harm does it? You mums out there really need to polish up your brain cells and have a good think next time you happily let little Johnny slip in the Call of Duty disc again. Give me strength...

No No and thrice no!

nope not allowed to in our house!

my dp plays cod, there is no way he would play the road rage games and stuff, but the issue of age guidance on games is the one thing we disagree on actually he would let ds1 play some 15games, after he has played them himself etc. we have the games console in the sitting rm so i can moniter what exactly is being played and if ds1 wants to play 12 rated games he does so when his siblings are out playing/in bed etc.

i am going to follow up some of the links on this thead actually and show them to dp! so thanks for those! :)

Um I strongly disagree with everyone on here I got aspergas syndrome and when i was 13 i played violent games none stop! This is the problem nobody could understand the way some1 with aspergas thinks! Obbsesions are not the parents fault these films and games tht people with aspergas gets hooked on is not there fault! Obbsesed means they could be obbsesed with a character oh the aspect of the entertainment not the killing.people with aspergas now from right and wrong and you all should tell ur kids if ur going to watch a violent movie oh play a violent game dont go out and copy it because if u do u will be put in jail for life its that simple!! When I have kids I will be telling them that!