How much do you 'ignore' your children?

[Gameboy]

Have just been out with two families - friends of ours- who have kids about the same age, and I have to confess, I am amzed by the extent to which they actively 'ignore' their children trhoughout the whole afternoon.

By this I mean they seem to 'zone out' from all the various requests/ questions/ constant 'to-ing and fro-ing' that seems typical of under- 6s??

As a result they actively seem to enjoy themselves more, manage to have 'adult' conversations (which I gave up years ago )and it seems that their kids eventually give up and go and sort out themselves whatever it is they want....( which seems like a good thing I suppose)

I can't decide whether I'm just a mug with my kids and let them dominate my life too much... but I simply CAN'T ignore them - it seems really rude and uncaring somehow??

Right I am going to get dressed!!!!

pmsl is this thing still going...

Moo, your children got a biscuit on Judge Flounce weekend? wow, I'm impressed!

Before you go Magnolia, my ex has called back and the trip to the cinema is on!

Hee hee, should get about half an hour of 'quality' time with dd before bed!

Message withdrawn

Lol.. I am back. Got dressed and wiped a baby wipe over my face before sister arrives. Just so I look like I give a carrot what I look like on a sunday afternoon Looked around house and decided it wasn't that messy so back on here wher I belong

weesadie, great!! 1/2 hour is perfect amount of time for a story, cuddle and off to bed

exactly and you know I feel that she will just end up appreciating me all the more..

www, I am an extremely good mother.

Now where are my kids again...?

i ignore both my children. Eldest has sevre learning disabilities and youngest is gifted, make of that what you will

I only 'ignore' ds when he's whinging or doing something he shouldn't like that.

When I have friends over, granted I'm not playing with him, he's entertaining himself with the other children, but if he comes up to me he gets a cuddle and a chat etc. ANd every now and then I'll move and play with him for a while or talk about what he's doing.

He's nearly 18 months.

i'm loving this thread. ds & dp (playing snap, so i'm justified in ignoring him ) wonder why i keep sniggering...

Thought of you and Karl today, Vaunda. Went out to lunch with my kids and partner and was having a lovely conversation with one of my sons about how I used to have a soda stream machine as a kid but put milk in it for an experiment, whereupon it exploded. He replied, rather too loudly for my liking, "That's cool Mummy. Can I get one? I'd like to piss in it and see if I could make fizzy wee." How I wished I had a Karl type kid by my side who would not have shamed me so...

Scummy!

And this summer's favourite game for my sophisticated and incredibly mature children (aged up to 10, embarrassingly) and sundry visiting friends, has involved sitting in the sandpit filling their knickers with sand while singing "I'm a Barbie girl...".

No chance of 5 A's at A level and Cambridge firsts there, then.

scummy

i have deicded that hte issue here is how vaunda posts not how she brigns up her child. my eldeszt boy is totally able to deal in adult situatons and pleasnat to talk to but he also has kiddy fun. it has taken a numebr of posts for me to realise that karl also has magic in his life because all the inital posts were about your proud in his proto-adulthood that people got concerned he was missing out

@ scummy and frogs!

frogs. So glad it's not just mine...

I have to agree that to only have adult friends is not a sign of social maturity but social immaturity - as you say, adults indulge children, let them lead the conversation etc, which their peers won't. As for only having disabled friends, well, that's mindbogglingly odd, frankly. Friends are people you do things with not do things for.
My ds definitely has immature social skills, and he too charms adults, prefers them and finds it harder to cope with children his own age. He's also bright, but my concern is to help him improve his interactions with children his won age.

I thought this thread was one of the best so far but Scummy's last post has actually made me cry with laughter.

How old is your ds aloha?

hmb, me too.

was raised almost exclusively in adult company until 31/2 when little sister arrived and have had big problems esp as a kid as a result.

it's not good.

pmsl at this thread. WTF did i have to be away while this came up?

i don't ignore my child, I facilitate free play.

PMSL I've had the weekend from hell but this thread has made me roar with laughter.

As for answering the original question, I think I have a fairly balanced approach. I don't stalk my son like he's my only friend but I don't ignore him. I always briefly interrupt my adult conversations to see what he wants.