Safe thread for those using Gina Ford/Babywhisperer routines

[MrsGangly]

Can we please have a thread dedicated to those wanting or trying to follow some routine, however strict or vague, rather like the attachment parenting thread, so we can encourage one another and get and offer advice without the bunfight that it invariably turns into from people who don't believe it is the way to go?

As I have said elsewhere, parents parent in different ways depending on them and their child (only have one but I imagine it changes a bit for each one) so let's all respect different people's choices.

If you don't 'approve' or 'believe in' routines and things work for you, that is great, but let's leave this for people who want to use some sort of routine.

Thank you.

I'll start.

I've got a 6 week old boy who was very sleepy to start with, so demand feeding wouldn't have worked for us. I woke him to breastfeed every 2 hours at least initially, although I obviously would feed him if he woke before then.

Now we are on a vague 2-3 hour routine based on my favourite bits from both GF and the BW. He has decided in the last few days that napping is for wimps but is quite content with it. He thankfully sleeps at night, waking himself up every 3 hours, when previously I had to wake him up every 3 hours overnight.

I've just posted on another thread about this. We used it from about 5 months and never looked back. We weren't as rigid as she seemed to be so only took the bits that fitted what we wanted. We had have a lovely little girl who is challenging us with puberty now. Why isn't there a contented semi adult book?

Sign me up!

DD is 21 weeks and we have been in a routine since she was a couple of weeks old. Having very little idea of what i was doing i read both Gina and Baby Whisperer and have adopted bits from both though i suppose we follow the babywhisperer ethos more closely than gina.

DD is thriving and frankly so am i. We started out on a 2 hour feeding routine and as DD has grown we have moved to a 3 hour and now a 4 hour routine. She sleeps like a dream at night 8pm to 8am and has done since about 10 weeks. I was giving her a dream feed at 11pm but we have dropped that since starting solids. She naps 3 times a day (10-11.30, 2-3.30pm and 5-6pm)and is generally a chilled out and contented little baby.

I love our routine and dont think either of us would be enjoying our life together nearly so much without it.

I am going back to work in a month and DD will be starting nursery. The nursery have said they will support our existing routine which is great and i think will help DD settle in. I shudder to think what life would be like going back to work if DD wasn't in a reliable routine. I am not sure i could do it.

Don't have babies anymore, but signing up to give you a bump.

DD had horrendous colic so I implemented a routine out of sheer desperation. She was sleeping through the night by 4 months.

DS, no colic, but decided on a routine anyway. He was sleeping 11pm-7am by 8 weeks.

The routines paid off and as toddlers they both only woke when ill and had a long afternoon nap at the same time

I followed the Baby Whisperer.

A great idea, Baby Whisperer was the most amazing thing I'd ever come across with ds1, by 9 weeks he was happily settling himself to sleep for naps and at bedtime, he was (and is!) such a happy little boy.

Ds2 on the other hand...horrendous sleeper, constant feeding, no amount of whispering was gonna get that child to sleep. Think it was a wing and a prayer that we survived the 1st year!!!

x

Yaaaaaay blooming brilliant idea for a thread!!!

Ds is nearly 8months and have followed a routine from day I came home after my cs..... Followed baby book by rachel waddilove and can't reccomend it highly enough - is very gina-esque just the tone writing is less bossy!

I'm following Gina Ford for my 3 month old. It was all going pretty well till a couple of weeks ago when the lunchtime nap started to go wrong. It's got shorter and shorter till a real low point today - only got her to nap for half an hour then she screamed till I took her out of her bedroom into daylight. The result is a grouchy overtired baby for the rest of the afternoon, even when I compensate with a longer afternoon nap. She only gets nice again at bathtime, then goes to sleep well at 7pm. I've cut back the morning nap to half an hour, but it hasn't helped. Any ideas? Afternoons have become really miserable. Thanks.

MrsGangly A great thread idea, I'm a routiner through and through, I'd be a mess without it (and I suspect so would my DDs!)

I have an 19mo DD who was on Baby Whisperer from day 3, the onto Gina at about 10 weeks and despite all her efforts to the contrary is now a wonderful sleeper.

I also have a 12wk old DD who is a much calmer baby and so I'm being slightly more relaxed and is currently half way moving between BW and Gina - we'll get there eventually. She has started to go through the night without feeding now, though always wakes and is unsettled at around 4.30am for 20 minutes or so. I think I remember DD1 doing the same so I'm hoping its going to finish soon.

The only problem we have at the moment is that she isn't really able to consistently make it from one nap time to the next without any catnaps. I think she has started a growth spurt and its making her more tired, again, hoping it will pass soon. Its only a problem when we go out because she is utterly powerless to resist napping in the car, its such a pain because then it throws the whole day out.

Rhubarb I have a fellow routiner friend who said that at about 3 months the '45 minute intruder' arrives (though both of mine have had this from birth) which might be whats happening to your lunch nap. You've probably heard about it but if not, its where at anything between 30mins and an hour into a nap their sleep cycle comes into light sleep, the wake and then can't get back to sleep. With DD1 I spent a lot of time sat next to her cot, patting and stroking her back and reassuring her until she went back to sleep and gradually she learnt to do it on her own.

Rhubarbgarden - can you put the lunchtime nap back 20 mins or so? What time is she fed - shes not waking up hungry? I must admit Alf has never been that big on his lunchtime naps - I learnt to jiggle morning/afternoon naps accordingly, ut there were some grumpy afternoons/early evenings on the way!!

I am a MASSIVE fan of routine. I had Alf at 10.28am - by 12.30pm i was told by the midwife there was no need for me to stay in, and I came out erly evening. This was after another newborn very, very sadly diesd in the room next to Alf :( First child, I literally did not have a CLUE what I was doing. He screamed all thr first night and I was convinced he was going to die because I was doing something wrong.

Confience at rock bottom and hormones all over the shot, I very, very quickly developed very severe PND (enough to be carted off to the local Mental Health unit). I hit absolute rock bottom.

Then I read the BW and CLB books, and they made sence. Babys ar not rocket secience. They do not spontaniously combust in the middle of the night. They do not cry at am purely to torment thier mothers who haddnt selpt in days and could barly walk due to a zillion stictches in places that stitches should never, ever relly go!

Instead, they sugested Baby will probably be hungry at such and such a point, baby will probably be sleepy at such and such a point, try this if they cry, maybe steralise your bottles now, try a bath at this point, try a nap of such and such a length.

And by gum, it worked. Eeryone who has met Alf xommented on just hw litle he cried. I was, for the first time, confident in my ability to know what my beatutiful little boy wanted and needed. He slept through from 7 weeks and at 16 moths I can say hand on heat he has probably not had my up more the 20 times in the night since.

I honestly dont know WHY people have such an issue with routine. It helps baby have a sence of understading about the day and it means they are well fed and rested by a confident and happy mum who can spend the rest of the day snuggling and playing instead of pulling thier hair out!

I worry that my DS is not getting enough rest during the day as he only catnaps very briefly occasionally, although he sleeps really well at night, waking about every 3 hours for a quick feed. He is quite content during the day but can be grumpy come late afternoon/evening.

Today is going to the first day of an experiment. Rather than me perhaps missing his sleep cues during the day, I'm going to try following GF very closely to see if it makes a difference.

Anyone got any other advice for encouraging daytime sleep? Or could he just be a wakeful baby who doesn't need to sleep?

I picked bits from BW (EASY and the crying guide especially) and it worked well with DD (22 months). I am now trying to use bits again with DS (14 weeks) but it's harder when DD needs to go out to playgroups. He seems to cope well though and is a contented wee man most of the time despite being hauled out of sleep to go in the car/pram.

DD always slept more than GF's guidelines (I was given the book so skimmed it briefly and fell out with it the moment it said I should get up at 7am... I am not a morning person!) I just glanced at her book every so often for rough ideas on how many feeds/naps might be normalish for the changing months.

According to GF DD would never sleep at night if I let her sleep so much in the day, but DD disagreed and still sleeps more than many of her peers. I always figured if DD was up at night wanting to play I'd lower daytime sleep, but otherwise there was no way I was waking a snoozing baby. Last winter she regularly slept from 7pm to 9am - a girl after my own heart!!

I think DS sleeps a fair amount but I am so distracted sorting out DD I don't know I just feed him every 3 hours, play a bit and when he gets a bit gurney or fidgets a lot I pop him down somewhere for a nap. This week he happily fell asleep on playmats at two different toddler playgroups.

I'm trying to encourage him to skip his 3am feed by slowing reducing the amount of milk I offer him by one unit every couple of nights (ie 6 fl oz last night instead of 7) and hoping he will naturally drink more in the day to compensate. DD slept through from 6 weeks but DS is much heftier.

Lovethesea Sounds like I'm in the same boat as you, we're vaguely on routine with DD2 (12wks) but taking DD1 (19mo, well nearly!) to playgroups etc really buggers it all up!

DD2 also sleeps way in excess of what GF suggests but, like you, because she sleeps at night I don't think she is getting too much. I'm guessing some just need more than others.

We're on track today, despite going out to a sing along session but its the 12wk jabs this afternoon so all will certainly go to hell for a few days afterwards.

Alfie is 17 months now, but I wrote this for grandparents and my hasband when Alf was 8 weeksish!

Alfie (Model #1)

Operational Guide

The Alfie (Model #1) is a prototype model, which currently means users may experience sudden and unexplained episodes of crying, vomiting, urine and faeces. These bouts are not a result of malfunction, and the manufacturer cannot be held responsible for any damage to clothes or soft furnishings that may arise during operation.

In order to minimise the risk of the anomalies above occurring, the Alfie (Model #1)should be operated on the following cycle (please note that it is likely the model will not conform exactly to the below, however users are asked to persevere in order to gain optimum performance):

Recommended Cycle:

7am: feed (6.5 oz)
7.45am ? 9am: playtime (to include any nappy changes, top and tailing, jungle gym time, walks ect)
9am ? 10am: Nap/sleep/cuddle time
10am: nappy change & feed (6.5 oz)
10.45am ? 12pm: playtime (to include any nappy changes, top and tailing, jungle gym time, walks ect)
12pm ? 1pm: Nap/sleep/cuddle time
1pm: Nappy change & feed (6.5 oz)
1.45pm ? 3pm: playtime (to include any nappy changes, top and tailing, jungle gym time, walks ect)
3pm ? 4pm: Nap/sleep/cuddle time
4pm ? Nappy Change & feed (6.5oz)
4.45pm ? 7pm: Bath time, pyjama change and wind down activities (overuse of Alfie (Model #1) during this period may result in malfunction during 2-4am)
7pm ? Nappy Change & feed (6.5oz) ? users are encouraged to feed in the darkened nursery to minimise the chance of malfunction).
7.30pm ? bedtime. Users must ensure that Alfie (Model #1) is elevated at the visual/audio end, in order to minimise risk of malfunction)
10.30pm ? night feed (6.5oz) ? users are encouraged to feed in the darkened nursery to minimise the chance of malfunction).

Please Note:
Due to the prototype nature of this model, some units are experiencing issues with food containment, resulting in occasional spillage. Side effects can be minimised through the application of one sachet of Gaviscon to every feed. When encouraging units to expel excess air taken in at feed time, users must not bang or pat the units back. Instead, Users are encouraged to rub the unit gently on the back to aid this process. It is anticipated that most units need to expel air once during a feed, and once after.

glad I don't have to defend my desire to want routine on this thread!

Love your user manual todlderwrangler!! :o

DinahRod, as per your request this is our routine.

It has evolved from when DD was tiny to now (21weeks). Timings are estimates. Up until a week ago she would take 45 minutes to finish a bottle because she was soooo distractable. The last 10 days though she is back to keeping her mind on the job and will finish a bottle in 10-15 minutes (hurrah!)

7am - wake and feed 8-9oz
7.30 - 9am - play time (usually on her play mat practising her proto crawling)
9am - 10.30am - sleep
11am - feed 8-9oz
11.30 - 1.30pm - playtime plus solids
1.30pm - sleep
3.00pm - feed 8-9oz
3.30-5pm - playtime
5-6pm - sleep
6.30 - dinner (solids)
7.00pm - bath and dressing for bed
7.30pm - feed 8-9oz
8pm - sleep

Basically we aim to have a feed every 4 hours. We dont follow the clock re nap times but DD is fairly predictable as to how long she can stay awake for once she has woken up so it is pretty easy to know when she is going to start getting tired.

I don't wake her at 7 if she is not already awake. Sometimes she will go through to 8am and some days she is awake at 6 (usually when idiot boy DH doesn't close the bathroom door when he has a shower and wakes us both up with his crashing about)

Whether she wakes up early or late though we just start the 4 hour routine from then.

Did any of you try Pick Up, Put Down by the Baby Whisperer... My DS can't get to sleep himself, I gave to feed him to sleep. Pick Up, Put Down has been recommended to me, but I'm not sure I'll be able to do it, I give in very easily to crying!

marking place for later

Just to give you all some positive feedback - I followed GF when my DS was born (not 'to the letter' but the general gist of it) - it worked really well; he was so easy to settle at night, never had any problems at all. When he started playschool in the mornings he still loved his afternoon sleep - of all my friends' children he is the one that has never had any problems sleeping. He is aged 9 now and still goes to bed very happily at a sensible hour.

Good luck to you all.

I love routines. I actually used Rachel Waddiloves routines with mine but stole lots of ideas from the Baby Whisperer. Worked a treat with my 2.

Positive bump from me too

Pebble - PUPD worked a treat with my DD, it was horrid to at the time, but as I never left her cot side and just picked her up and calmed her and then lay her down again, it wasn't as gut wrenching as CC. Just took about 70 times of picking up before she finally went to sleep the first time but over the next few days it reduced and reduced.

With my second child PUPD didn't work so well, so tried something different.

We always had a routine, which was not rigid and changed over time. I could not live without it. DS seems to love his (actual) routine. My Mom said that I was the same when I was little, and generally settled into a routine without any hassle.

Another routine fan here - DS is 8.5 months, and has been doing a slightly modified GF routine. He was another baby who if I'd only fed on demand, would have starved.

Thanks Tea, he's 5 months old and no one can get him to sleep (not even naps) except for me. I'm going to have to try, I just hope I haven't left it too late.