MN Little Italy 20 ........Buon Natale !

[Rosa]

Here we are then ........

ooh thanks Franca, I will do a search later that's great,. The budget isn't fixed and we want it right but hopefully it'll be somewhere in between my tight budget and db & sil enormous one (usually) we have similar tastes but i'd go for the cheaper end and them...well you get the picture .

There's a big showroom place in Civita Castellana (other side of motorway IYSWIM) called Erica, they have loads and loads of tiles as well as sinks etc. Quite expensive but good for ideas.

Otherwise there is a place down in the industrial park near Poggio Mirteto scalo where we got our tiles and bath and bidets from, kind of a building supplier but had quite a range of tiles, called Michiori.

We also got a bit of stuff from the big Leroy Merlin store (next to Ikea) in the mall where the motorway meets the Rome ringroad.

bloody Ikea is also good for free standing kitchens, no?

Wow, what a lovely house sputnik!

Yes that's the Tuscany house, it's really lovely, and they've put a lot of personal touches. They've been working on it for 6 years now and still not finished! Half is done though and is available for rent if anyone is interested .

I like those ikea varde ones, with free standing you'd avoid issues of walls/floors not being straight etc.

Oh yes, the varde is nice.
If I had a country house, I'd probably mix and match with modern and old pieces, perhaps an old madia... boh!

Good to know it is for rent, I'll bookmark the website. I'm always happy to visit tuscany

Btw, my sinusitis headache is back again. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

BTW Delgirl, not sure of our plans atm for that weekend, as DH will be away, but pretty sure we'll be around the saturday.
I'd love to come up and have a nosey actually, I love a project!

still here looking at kitchens.i really must go argh.

Yes, please do come and have a nosey. It will be cold and dusty etc but you may have some suggestions . That's if we can get in to the 2nd apartment as I couldn't last time . We have to leave around 3pm on Saturday prob but around til then. Right I am orf lol

Actually if I was you I'd take a trip to Deruta (in Umbria, prob about 1 hour away from you) they have ceramics that would be in keeping with the age of your place, this kind of thing. Choose a few really nice tiles then intersperse them with plain white ones on the splashback. Units in muratura covered in white tiles, you could use these for worktop too or else wooden worktop. Light coloured terracotta floor.
Find a really nice old dresser that's not too frilly IYSWIM.

We are turning this into a LI house thread. That place in Umbria looks lovely.
I suffered from OT tin Deruta there was so much that I couldn't remember what I saw in the start and ended up with 2 plates only ! I love the Umbrian ceramics!
House the huge pro is the price .We are waiting for the ok for the carte for the condono and then we wait and see...It is not the house of our dreams but it is a step in the right direction and we really do want to get on the ladder bear in mind we have been looking for 3 years now and we keep getting kicked in the face.
Seen on the Geneva thread that MM is going to a meet up so pleased .
Right off to do something constructive ...possibly!

Rosa, if price and location are right and there are no legality issues then you should really think about it. Does it have light? Ok the kitchen is small but if you had a practical table in the dining part you could use that for food prep too, and there are all those little storage rooms you could use as larder.
You never said if you could get a double bed in the smaller bedroom? For the DDs the ikea toddler beds are smaller than full size but still something like 1.70, so good for a few years yet and save a few cms. I don't like bunk beds either and decided against one, especially as we had one in a hotel and DD kept trying to climb down from it in her sleep.

( Sorry Rosa totally dominates this thread about her flat !)
SPutnik thats what I think - I don't think a double could go in there but we are hoping for a second visit when they have the carte to hand and I will go and measure. DId you get my e mail with the plan ?
My other idea is to knock down the bathroom as it seems that those walls are parete and extend the single bedroom and keep the wc and hand basin that are attched on the end.This would become our bedroom ( smaller!!)
Then put the bathroom where the kitchen is and do a kitchen diner salotto some how in the 2 'living rooms'. We have the childrens room as we bought it and would be a pity to leave it behind it cost the best part of Eu1000......
Am on edge waiting for the phone call to say that they have the carte....I know somebody else is going to see it domani we have said we are seriously interested as long as we can see the carte. NOt going to put up a deposit until we see them and we get the ok from the geomtra re the wall......

Rosa, we were always in tiny flat, and perfectly doable, if you have an eye for knocking down walls, how to decorate small spaces, etc..

i meant before we were in tiny flat....

Yes I got your email, I got the idea you couldn't knock anything down. In that case moving the bathroom sounds good, and you could eliminate the corridor between the 2 living rooms.

Rosa, I think that's a good plan!

Have not managed to catch up yet- babySG decided to keep us all up last night so am shattered... Also stitches seriously limit sitting time and breastfeeding and pumping sessions have to be prioritised. Thank you all for the encouragement and support re breastfeeding- it really is helpful, particularly when gritting teeth through a feed at 2am. Have put out a call for TikTok and will ask midwife for more advice tomorrow.

Did any of you get the baby blues? I did, from the birth onwards, and they do not seem to have gone yet. Despite loving baby to bits, I feel rather overwhelmed about it all and cannot imagine how we will cope when my mother leaves at the weekend. Wondering whether it is normal, or whether I should be concerned. Me being me, I am concerned- which obviously does not help the situation... Sorry, this is all rather self-centred, but having a rough time here, despite lots of support from DH, who is being fantastic, and my family...

About 2 months ago we had a quick chat about reusable nappies and I think Camomilla was very happy with hers- could I have the name/brand please (if allowed)? Discovered nasty rash on baby's legs today, I think it might be the rubber from the nappies' seals, so off to try reusables I think...

SG is it painful all the way through BF or just the first minute or so? The second is fairly normal I think but if it continues you probably need help from someone in RL, it could be anything. Some people swear by nipple shields, Camo upthread says Silverette.

Yes it's very overwhelming isn't it, especially if you're used to having control over your life! You will cope, somehow, things will settle down. I suffered more from pg blues so can't help you there, beyond first week or so was ok really.

Re nappies I use Motherease one size, you can get just about anywhere. Maybe muslins would be sufficient on such a small baby, there is a chat thread for cloth nappy users here, might be worth going on there and asking advice.

Oh bless you SG
Yes, I had the baby blues with DS. I was in pain because of the episiotomy and couldn't sit properly for at least two weeks, breasts were huge and engorged, baby cried all the time and wanted to feed constantly (which played on usual insecurity: "have I got enough milk?"), baby didn't sleep for more than 40 minutes. I was tired, sore and overwhelmed, and scared that I'd have never made it out of the house ever again

What helped me getting through those first days was the fact that, as ds was born here in Milan, I got lots of company from family and friends. Which I understand many don't appreciate going by MN threads , but it worked for me. And dark chocolate (banale, but true!)

Here's what I think:

• I think it is totally normal to worry about how you'll cope when your mum leaves. You could ask her to stay for another few days, there is nothing wrong with it (I would do it ). But chances are that you and your dh will cope very well on your own too .
• Hopefully your stitches will get better soon (and get them checked if you feel they aren't improving) and being able to go for a walk with your lovely ds and get a vague resemblance of a "normal" life will help.
• Don't be afraid to ring your friends for a good old moan, it helps!!!

I hope you get some good advise re breast feeding. Camo was mentioning silver nipple shields.

Sending you lots of love SG, and hopefully see you soon on here!!!

Hi, McNulty here.
Hi SG, speak to the gp maybe about your feelings? Don;t expect everything to be perfect and lower your expectations? Sorry, those are hard times, but for me it helped enormously to do these two things, and spend time with the baby, but also sleep and get dp to take over. Don't care about the house looking a mess, etc. You only have to do the best you can. I stopped breastfeeding very early on and that made me bond immediately with the baby, am not saying you should do this, breastfeeding was not too important for me,for other women is the key to bonding, personally i just wanted not to feel too wretched to enjoy il mio tesoro. Some women who breastfed successfully and happily told me after 2 weeks the breast felt a lot better. Of course speak to friends in RL and don't feel you have to pretend is all honky dory, open up and things will work.
oh i wish i had your baby.

lol lol lol at using tommycarcetti as your new mn name !

SG baby blues here too, not at the very beginning, after a few weeks and lasting a while. Remember this: IT IS A SHOCK having first baby. It is nothing like you have ever done before. It (it being not the baby but the situation) cannot be dealt with like a job or anything that has happened before. McNulty is right: LOWER your expectation, big time. It is difficult, very, especially if you are someone used to DO things and be in control of your own life. I struggled immensely.
You will get your life back and it will get better, promise (you might want to do it again ) and you will enjoy it. Maybe not now and there's absolutely nothing wrong with not enjoying it. I do not like the first months - not one bit. I feel a bit suffocating and bored. I have done it twice and yet when I see a newborn my first reaction is NO F WAY!!!
Re breastfeeding very hard for me first couple of weeks with dd1 - nipples and cramps. Used a special cream from farmacist from italy which was miracolosa! Then did it for 5 months but glad to stop and regain some freedom. Again like McNulty I think it is a very personal decision. You have to rank the BF against many things. If BF very important to you then try more, it will get better and you might enjoy it or find it easy and practical and you will bond. But do not beat yourself up - if it doesn;t work out you are still the best mamma. If you are not that keen and are losing your mind over it I suggest you try something else. Your sanity is very important atm.
same goes for clothes nappies.

What I have learnt about being a mother is this: one is that it lasts a lifetime - one doesn't have to get it all right from day one and one is allowed to and should make changes according to many things; two that you do not have to love every minute of it, it doesn't mean you don't love your children; sometimes it is okay to long for the life you had, it doesn't mean you regret having children.

listen to yourself.

and come here to vent; without being patronising, we know it feels as if a bomb has wrecked the lovely life you had!

Now re houses: yes kitchen in muratura vey popular in country houses in umbria as well. Most I have seen are only plastered in white like the walls and tiles or wood or granite on top so very light.

Rosa sounds very doable for me with new plan. I am praying for you!!!

buch any suggestion for holiday where you are?

i#ll be back in a bit.

Can you imagine i fancied Carcetti like mad when i first watched the series he is in? I swear in rl i don't go for his type at all.

I think in psichiatry they talk a lot about being a good enough mum, that's what we can strive for. The key is bonding... ohh goodness, you are making me crave a newborn, they are so wonderful and smart and beautiful and their smell, their coscine di pollo, I found them good company, magical, a real link with my inner self and THEY DON'T MOVE.
I am broody now , so off to eat some biscuits.

sorry have been absent, no energy for banter unless twilight related (brain's gone to mush).

SG, huge hugs, i can totally sympathise: i had mosnter case of baby blues with dd1, i too had horrible stitches/scar whcih hurt for weeks (but it stopped eventually i promise!), dd1 never ever slept, day or night, i was exhausted (in hindsight I know it was because i was anaemic- get yourself some floradix, quick!). I couldn't stop crying. My dd1 was also born in the middle of winter (february) andthe short days, cold grey weather etc really didn't help. Somehow as soon as spring came we came back to life.

things DO get better, slowly. If I could do one thng differently it would be to get some help- i was completely alone after my mum left, and while that was nice in a way (it felt good to organise my own day), i think if i had had someone to just take the baby out for one hour in the pram while i showered/slept/done nothing it would have really helped. I could have gotten that help, but felt it would be an admission of failure. Well, it isn't, motherwhood is not about failing or succeeding. Same goes for breastfeeding really, I am a staunch pro breastfeeder but if, for any reason, you wanted a break from it, you should go for it with zero regrets or guilt trips.

I would also echo Pippi's words, it's a long term game, it's not the birth you had, the milk he drank, whether you were the one sauntering in a posh cafe at 2 weeks post partum or the one who stayed home in her jammies until the baby turned 6 months...

If sitting is uncomfortable- have you tried feeding him lying down? Not only the position might make it less painful, you get to rest, and supposedly the skin to skin is supposed to be very good for bonding/hormones.

I am not making any sense at all am I. I hope you get better soon, coraggio!

Is there a definition for bonding?