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Original poster

What do you think about "not doing anything" when children are at school/nursery?

661 replies

morningpaper · 19/05/2005 12:04

My daughter's peers are starting nurseries ... and I'm finding myself really SHOCKED at the fact that my mummy-friends aren't doing anything with their time while their children are out of the home. I asked a friend last week what she did and she said "Oh I just get home, tidy up a bit, have a coffee - and then I have to pick him up again!"

As I work from home there is ALWAYS some work I can do. I also do voluntary work and could always do with more time to get stuff done.

I also don't understand why their partners are happy with them just taking 'mornings off' to themselves - aren't they a bit miffed?

I'm probably just jealous but I can't help but think that they are just plain lazy! What do other people feel about this?!

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 19/05/2005 18:33

Nasty, but oh what fun it's been. Taken my mind right off my unfulfilling tidying up and coffee.

WigWamBam · 19/05/2005 18:33

I thought it was a great post too, sunchowder.

JoolsToo · 19/05/2005 18:34

why do things always get interesting on here when I'm busy?

Jimjams · 19/05/2005 18:34

ha ha ha - all the little intrigues to do with the husbands ha ha ha. How I wish- whenever I meet my SAHM friends we talk about DLA forms and respite and how to stop our children peeing on the floor/climbing on conservatory roofs/running off with strangers dogs. And sometimes we talk politics, or sex, or all the other things that people talk about at work (sex mainly ime of working).

I still don't know whether I'm a SAHM or a working mum as I work very part-time from home. Am I boring SAHM who fills her life with soap? Don't know -ds1 fills our house with washing -up liquid if left alone for 2 seconds (its sticky on bannisters btw). When I meet friends without children we don't really talk about children, so I think I am capable of engaging my brain sufficiently to talk to proper grown-up (heaven forbid a SAHM could be a proper grown up).

sunchowder · 19/05/2005 18:34

Thank you supporters then...

WigWamBam · 19/05/2005 18:35

Yep, great fun. I love being called lazy, dim, disorganised, unfulfilled, and accused of sitting on my fat arse watching telly all day, I get a load of kicks out of that.

emily05 · 19/05/2005 18:35

I am a SAHM and I have a pension that I pay into every month (you dont have to work now to have a pension plan).

I really think that everybodies situation is different. I think until you walk in somebodies shoes you cant really judge. There are good mothers who are SAHM and bad ones, good mothers who work and juggle their homelife effective, and those who dont! Some dads are great dads some are bad. You get the idea!!

So to stand and judge the choices that us women make - that really there are no rights and wrongs, is just silly. Every family is different. And thank goodness because life would be boring if we were all the same.

lima · 19/05/2005 18:35

Jimjams - you are very witty - most un-SAHMlike

weesaidie · 19/05/2005 18:36

Sunchowder - I don't think you are an asshole! I thought you made some very thoughtful points! I am in awe of all the work you do!

Fio2 · 19/05/2005 18:39

fairymum YOU CALED ME DIM! and you even suggested i watched philip and fern for goodness sake, how insulting

Catterick · 19/05/2005 18:40

Any other stereo types you would like to share with us fairymum? Surely you don't want to categorise members of society. That's so 50s!

FairyMum · 19/05/2005 18:43

Fio2, I didn't call you dim personally. I said people who didn't see my point about the financial aspect of being a sahm and want to look after their own self/interests dim. I only suggested Fern and Phil might be a good idea, because I thought it waa through these channels one communicated to Sahms

JakB · 19/05/2005 18:43

Yeah, Jimjams, you are far too educated to be a SAHM filling your life with soap, darling . Just think how easy it would be to find somebody to look after all the Ds's while you're being a proper, intelligent human being outside the home? Be a doddle, I reckon. I mean, DS1 is SO easy. God, this thread is so judgemental. I would never judge a mum who worked outside the home and I don't expect to be judged for working inside it, either.
ps I do watch Philip and Fern

FairyMum · 19/05/2005 18:44

I find you all quite funny. You get very heated up a bit this obviously. You must have some (in an american accent unresolved issues and perhaps frustrated because you relaise you already ARE your own mothers. Would you agree Sunchowder?

SoupDragon · 19/05/2005 18:44

Er... yes you did, FM

SoupDragon · 19/05/2005 18:45

In paragraph adressed directly to Fio you said "if you are not worried about this situation, I think you really must be a bit dim."

FairyMum · 19/05/2005 18:46

Well, I meant "You" as in "If ONE are not worried"...Sorry, if misunderstood. Well, someone just called me nasty and speaking a lot of tosh. Buu-huu

lima · 19/05/2005 18:47

yes that would be me - a lot of tosh

JakB · 19/05/2005 18:47

The only unresolved issue I've got is you and your incredibly unintelligent posts

PuffTheMagicDragon · 19/05/2005 18:47

Spot on SD.

Why do people hurl personal insults then try to backtrack?

MABS · 19/05/2005 18:47

what's wrong with Philip and Fern? I manage to fit them in between ds' hospital appts and me working a whole 12 hrs per week....

Catterick · 19/05/2005 18:48

Saucer of milk , table for one, fm?

Britney · 19/05/2005 18:48

AAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

JakB · 19/05/2005 18:48

Hiya Mabs

tamum · 19/05/2005 18:49

I work outside the home in a very fulfilling job. Have made my statement, I have to say that your posts on this thread, Fairymum, are the most unpleasant I've ever read on MN. I know you don't give a stuff, but I had to say it. You're being vile.