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I think I have too much in my life - help me sort out prioritising please!

27 replies

hereidrawtheline · 23/03/2009 13:55

I am just going to list some of the stuff I have to do regularly, can you please tell me if it sounds too much or if I am just incompetent at managing my time? I really need to know as I dont seem to be getting enough done properly and too much done half arse.

I have recently decided to make a consistent effort with how I look so regular make-up/grooming etc is taking place

I have DS who is 3 in Aug and very lovely and very high maintenance! That is the nice trite way of putting it, he is being assessed for SN and takes a lot of looking after and has very little self sufficiency.

I have a husband who works full time and has only 1 hobby of his own - gardening. But he does cook all our dinners as by that time of day I usually have a migraine coming on & need a break. Other than that he mainly only does housework that I explicitly tell order him to do. But he will do what I ask. But I am aware if I ask him to do too much in the evening he loses out on his relaxation time too.

I have 10 animals, 2 cats, 4 degus, 4 rabbits. They all take a lot of looking after - cats almost constantly especially since Yang got shot with an air rifle, and the other 8 need work 2 times a day min. each time taking between 15-30 mins

I really want to start raising butterflies.

We do a lot of gardening. It's mainly DH's project but I am involved as is DS. We are growing around 40 different types of veg this year. I also have one very precious orchid that takes very little looking after but I plan on adding to it at some point. Dont laugh at my life!

The house used to be very clean almost all the time but now is gross much of the time. It needs a lot more work doing to it. A LOT.

I read but mainly only 15-30 mins before I sleep each night. I cant do without that but I wish I could increase it a little.

I belong to 3 forums, this one, a SN one, and a rabbit one. MN is mainly for fun and lots of helpful info & support about DS's issues. The rabbit one is a small group of people I am friends with and enjoy. The SN one is one I keep wanting to find time for and it keeps getting pushed back because of the needs of the other 2.

I have responsibilities with the rabbit forum - I am starting up a monthly game thing for us involving small sums of money and money to animal charities.

I just stopped organising the arts & craft at local playgroup as it was one thing definitely too much.

I am backed up on emails - people I really want to talk to and I just dont write them back. Because I cant find time. The only person I email regularly easily is my friend in Vegas because our emails are hilarious and succinct one sentence long to each other. LOTS other friends & family I know I hurt or offend by taking ages to reply and I feel bad about this. I forget to send cards for birthdays. I have birthdays all the bleeding time. It really isnt that I dont care or am not interested. Quite the contrary I spend a lot of time planning and organising stuff for other people. Just I do it randomly & find it hard to do it on command with dates etc.

I need to find time to list loads of things on ebay.

lord there is more I am sure I am forgetting! Writing it down now it doesnt seem like too much but all I know is I am like a whirling dirvish I just never relax totally and really the list of things to do is immense.

Every day I spend hours obviously with DS playing and looking after him. When he is able to play on his own for 5 mins at a time I quickly dash and unload the dishwasher or laundry or do some animal chore that needs doing. I usually sleep when DS has a nap, I am truly exhausted all the time and cant keep my eyes open. Then basically when we wake up from our nap I resume playing & trying to clean a minute at a time & keeping the hundreds (ok, 10) animals safe, fed, watered etc.

Then DH gets home from work I tend to take about 15-20 mins to use the internet then I have to clean while DH does dinner, or I am lying down for 10 mins before as my eyes hurt. Then we eat, then DS's elaborate bedtime routine starts. By 8:30 I am finished, and exhuasted. I sit on the laptop usually spend too long trying to catch up on threads or emails, then drop into bed without having cleaned anymore.

The animals are non negotiable. DS & DH are non negotiable. I do really want to raise butterflies and think if I could just set the initial stuff up I could work it out. That is something I want to do for me, my interests. The rabbit forum has to stay because they count on me. Not to mention I would be really sad if I stopped using it. MN is addictive (as we all know) and I do spend more time here than I need to. So I have been thinking of limiting myself only to the need I have of the lovely people on the SN boards, and refuse to use the rest of the forum. It would gain me a lot of time.

Help! what am I doing wrong? If I remember all the stuff I am forgetting I will post it.

OP posts:
Sonnet · 23/03/2009 14:53

So that 1 morning a week DS goes to nursery dedicate to housework....

Second the birthday card idea - I do a similar thing.

Cut dowm the forums - if you pop on once every 30/60 mins that is a lot of time you are taking up. - catch up 2 evenings a week

Have one set evening a week for DH - have your meal together, catch up etc

What time does DS wake up? would it be possible for you to get up earlier and do the morning animals prior to him waking or with Dh to take over getting DS up when he wakes?

Good luck - hope you feel better with life soon

cazboldy · 23/03/2009 15:01

I think you probably need to spend less time on the pc

to put it bluntly, you have no job, 1 dc and some pets

lucky you and there is nothing wrong with that

lots of people have lots of things they have to do

you have lots of things you want to do.
You need to prioritise, and have a bit of a routine, much as I hate that word....

such as going on the computer after doing some housework/playing with ds/doing the animals if you have time to....

I know where you are coming from, and I have 5dc, and 3 ponies,a cat, 2 dogs, a bird, chickens and a rabbit.

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