Lyra, Oggs, Berrie, Zeb and Binkle....OVER HERE!!!!

[binkleandflip]

Sorry I didn't come back Berrie - lets hope you get some improvement

Ooh, Lyra, that sounds fun . Actually, it really does

If you're lurking Zeb, I hope you're okay.

Deserted by entrepreneur Binkle again I see

May not be here for a while. Personal stuff to sort.
I'll be thinking of you though x

Thinking of you too then Oggs.
You know where we are.

Hi All, I'm back at last - with a name change which seems kinda appropriate as I've finally stopped bouncing. Google it if you want the definition as I'm too dumb to explain it.

The move all went well. It was totally exhausting but I feel so relieved. The flat is lovely and only 2 mins from the office and 4 mins from the nursery. DH isn't doing so good and is determined to fight, which I think is going to get more difficult. But it's all just so sad rather than anything else, and I just feel so guilty At the moment I'm not sure what I'm doing, but I just need a few months to get my head together at the very least.

But overall, even though it's such early days, I feel pretty good.

Oggs, I hope stuff's ok with you, and Berrie. I'm so sorry for everything you're going through. I'm really not sure what I can say that can help, except to big you a massive massive hug and offer you my spare bed - by sheer fluke the sofa I brought with me is the sofa-bed!

Lyra - good luck with the party. You're a braver gal than me.

Binkle - just step away from the pneumatic chairs. They're not toys.

Glad that things are going okish for you. You move fast!
When you say dh is going to fight, do you mean fight for you or fight about other things?
How has ds taken it?

Yep, no hanging about. When I make a decision, I'm afraid that's it.

As for fighting, I think he's fighting for the marriage, not me per se. I can tell you, it's a lot easier to think clearly away from it all than it is when I'm there.

Are you OK?

Wow, you do move fast!
Was DH there for the move? what does DS think of it all?
How are you today Berrie?
I've been knackered all day because of monstrous period pains which kept me awake most of the night. Some months I get terrible pain, some months none at all. No rhyme or reason to it.

Morning all.
I am absolutly fine. It worries me how on off this all is as it just doesn't feel like ordinary depression to me. I even looked up bipolar disorder but fortunatly that wasn't me...

Poor Lyra, are you feeling any better today? Can you not beg the Dr for a sledge hammer of a painkiller just for these situations? I have very fond memories of the dihydrocodine I had after childbirth

Zeb...sorry can't remember the new one yet. Are you at work? Is dh back in London? Who is letting the chickens out?

Oggs, hope you are alright. Come back soon.

Binkle, what are you like?

You've just reminded me Berrie that I have some knock-out painkillers from when I had the back problem. They're in the back of a cupboard. And there I was struggling with Sainsbury's own-brand paracetamol which did nothing to ease the pain. What a fool!

Ah well, you'll know for next time!

Lyra, it's not endometriosis is it? (or however you spell it). Are you feeling any better now? I guess a day in bed with hot water bottles and daytime tv may help a bit more too.

Berrie, I'm glad you've pulled out of it again. It's grim when you're in the middle of it, but at least you are coming through it and it's only a few days. Has the doctor not really been any help, or perhaps got you a referal for counselling or something?

As for me, yes I am back at work and LOVING walking in with DS each morning, getting up at least an hour later and just generally chilling. DS is ok with it at the moment. I've explained it as daddy having a London flat, mummy having her flat, and then a farm at weekends. I think he's more aware of what's going on but isn't really saying much, but overall, he seems to be liking being here too. However..... DH collapsed at home yesterday through hypertension, hyperventilation or whatever and called an amubulance. (he's been staying there all week because of all the animals and the builders). He's more or less ok but I think it was the final straw for him and he's agreed with his partner that he's leaving London, only doing around 3 days per month for board meetings etc. I know I should be jumping for joy, but I'm not. TBH my heart sank when he said that's what he's doing, which is not a good sign. We shall see what happens, but I think I'll be keeping the flat for the forseeable future and just see how we go, as I really still need to sort my head out and find 'me' again, if that makes sense?

Sorry, that was quite a long one. All about me again,

It's a bit late for that isn't it? Maybe if he hadn't left you stuck on the farm on your own all this time things wouldn't have turned out the way they have.
But maybe, once the pressure is off all of you, with DH living on the farm like he always wanted and you not being responsible for it on your own, you might be able to find a way back. If that's what you want. But as you say now's not the time for decisions, it's for chilling out and getting your head straight so you know what you really want.
And don't worry about long posts, we want to know how things are going.
As for endometriosis, I don't know if I have that but probably not. I've always had horrendous periods, from the age of 11. Having the DSs helped for a while but they seem to be going back to the old ways now.
And sadly there's no chance of curling up with a hot water bottle and daytime TV as I have a very demanding DS2 at home with me most days. I'm at work today now. No more pain today so far so I'm hoping that's it.

Oh poor you. I went on the pill at 15 because of bad periods. Funnily enough, mine are now also more painful since DS, but not every month either. Very odd.

And you're absolutely right about me and DH. We'll just have to see how it all goes, although I'm not feeling that positive. As you say, too little too late. He'll also be in a bad way today because his cows are being shown at the county show (probably winning everything) and he's not there to see it as he can't bear to see anyone who will discuss 'how are the family'. I do care about hurting him, but I'm not sure I care about him any more.

Right, enough of this. Let's all cheer up and think happy thoughts. Or at least be mean about someone else. Anyone see the Apprentice last night? Am I the only one who thinks Lucinda was a classic passive aggressive female cow? Yuck, couldn't stand her. Yep, I feel better now. I like Clare & Lee though.

What do y'all think I should do about this?

Tricky one Lyra...I don't have much experience in this area I'm afraid...

Eigen, dh and I split up years ago for a few months and I went to live in a shared house. It's not impossible, once you've had the time to find some perspective, that you may have a future. You are right though, you do have to take the time to go through it.
Don't worry about long posts!

I don't think much of the apprentices left.

I liked Lucinda's clothes apart from the hats. I wouldn't have liked to live with all those people either TBH but I think you are right about her. She is very like a boss I had who was actually a complete BITCH!

Ah, the female boss from hell. Ain't they always worse than the male ones! And I liked Lucinda's hats & clothes, it was the blinkin awful flower in hair I could stomach.

Lyra, I wish I could offer you advice, but I don't know what, so all I can do is send you loads of good luck vibes, particularly if you think it's your forever house.

Thanks Zeb. (can't get used to you new name - it's difficult to shorten).

Don't worry, I'll come up with something better soon.

Getting a bit flustered now. I'm being observed tonight by my big Boss. She needs to have seen an example of good practice. I'm good at what I do but I just need a bit of quiet time to sit and think about my lessons and make my final plan. Kids have other ideas...shouting, fighting, demanding...oh and I need to iron something to wear...

Berrie, you'll be fine. You know what you're doing, and I think you always seem pretty competent. Is there any way you can bribe the kids for good behaviour before the Big Boss comes in? You know, chocolate or something?

S'alright my Ma has come early so I'll head up to school early to get my head in gear.

Hello.

Berrie, so glad you've come out of it and are feeling better. Don't give up on searching for an answer now you feel better - you may be able to be more objective and push for something to be done. How did last night go?

Lyra, sorry, I'm no use in the house selling game. We sold our small terrace for a terrible loss and just before the prices rocketed so can't really advise.
Could you change estate agents and find a more pro-active one? Wear a sandwich board and take to the streets? I'm sure you're doing all you can but there are a few tips here

Zeb, I googled your new name but am none the wiser [dumb emoticon]. I'm glad you are in a more positive place now. It will give you the distance to be able to get your thoughts straight. You are a very strong lady.