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Original poster

How much board do you think I should pay my mum?

88 replies

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:00

I earn about £100 per week but am entitled to another £130 tax credits/ child benefit on top of that. I don't have to buy any food, but mine and ds' toiletries and I don't pay any bills (except for my phone bill and car related stuff) How much do you think is a fair amount to give her?

OP posts:

winniethewino · 23/03/2008 23:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

avenanap · 23/03/2008 23:02

£75 a week???

BoysOnToast · 23/03/2008 23:02

have you just moved in? what were you payting before? what would be going rate elsewhere? (not that you should pay going rate, just to compare)

Original poster

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:06

I don't know what going rate is. Currently she has child benefit and tax credits paid directly to her but I think £130 board is unreasonable.

OP posts:

serin · 23/03/2008 23:06

Why don't you ask her?
My sister lived with my parents for a while and they refused to take anything off her to help her to save up the deposit for a mortgage.

avenanap · 23/03/2008 23:08

I spend around £50 a week on food for ds and me, the rents £375, I also spend about £100 a month on bills so I'd say about £75 is fair.

winniethewino · 23/03/2008 23:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:12

glad i'm not the only one who thinks this is unreasonable then. don't know why i've done it for so long without questioning it!

OP posts:

Candlewax · 23/03/2008 23:15

Trouble is nappyaddict, where are you going to find accommodation for you and ds, including all food and bills at less that £130 pw. No dig at you by the way, I used to pay my Mum £15 pw albeit quite a few years ago...... You are stuck between a rock and a hard place at the moment.

LynetteScavo · 23/03/2008 23:16

How does she get child benefit (etc) paid directly to her?

My parents would never have charged us board, and I would never charge my children, so my opinion is probably distorted, but I think paying for your food would be more than enough.

Original poster

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:18

if we were to live on our own i would get housing benefit, so would just have bills and food to pay for. tbh i'm pretty sure i could do it for less than £130 a week, it's just waiting for somewhere to come up.

OP posts:

shelleylou · 23/03/2008 23:20

i used to pay my parents £30 a week and was earning just under £150 but i bought all of my own toiletries and any food etc that i specifically wanted and wasnt usually on her shopping list.

BoysOnToast · 23/03/2008 23:21

hope you manage to convince her to take less of a percentage of your money - 130 of 230 seems a hellava lot. candlewax makes a (horrid) relevent point tho...

maybe if she knew it was going into savings for you and ds to get on your own feet one day... (not that i can save to save me life and i have more than you)

what has she said about the money? is she going to be agreeable to a drop?

Original poster

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:26

the wages i have i do save. i always save at least £30 a week, but often more. i spend about £30 a week on bus fare, toddler groups, taking ds swimming, soft play etc but the rest i save. i will sometimes go to the cinema which costs about £8 but it's not like i go every week or perhaps on a night out but again that doesn't happen very often. i try to buy ds' clothes in the sale/or second hand stuff and i try to buy it all in advance for the next season so i get it all out of the way and know i haven't got to worry about it for a few months.

OP posts:

seb1 · 23/03/2008 23:30

Why does she get child benefit and tax credits for your Ds?

LynetteScavo · 23/03/2008 23:33

So if you weren't earning, she would take all your money and leave you with nothing?

But I'm guessing she's providing a lot of free child care?

Original poster

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:43

If i wasn't earning I guess I'd get income support or something, so I'd have that. She looks after ds for about 19 hours a week although he's asleep for 13 of them and he generally doesn't wake up, so she doesn't actually have to do much with him iyswim. she just puts him to bed.

OP posts:

Original poster

nappyaddict · 23/03/2008 23:46

seb - when I was pregnant the CAB advised that was the best thing to do. I didn't mind cos i was under the impression she only got about £60 per week, but I have recently found out it is much more than that.

OP posts:

WallOfSilence · 23/03/2008 23:58

What did you do about work that time?

remember you had a thread saying your neighbour offered to listen out for ds?

I too think £130 is excessive per week! Can you discuss it with your mum where you buy your own & ds's food & just pay her rent pw? I give my mam £30 pw (10 years ago)

FAQ · 24/03/2008 00:01

£130 a week is a LOT of money! That's less than H is paying for a room in a shared house..........and he still has to buy food too!!!!

Original poster

nappyaddict · 24/03/2008 00:11

I'm still there but with more flexible hours. I took a week's holiday and ds went to an evening childminder for the other week, while it got sorted out.

OP posts:

FAQ · 24/03/2008 00:12

sorry that's "more" than H is pahing

Original poster

nappyaddict · 24/03/2008 00:41

does he get bills included in that or is that extra aswell?

OP posts:

FAQ · 24/03/2008 00:43

bills are included - just food and stuff he needs to buy

Original poster

nappyaddict · 24/03/2008 00:47

how much does he pay a week?

OP posts:

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