Not inviting to my daughter birthday party

[ErinAoife]

Ex husband is organising a party for my daughter's birthday and I am not invited. It is upsetting me as I always invite him and his family to any celebrations I have for the kids, always invite him for Christmas Dinner etc...I was visiting his mother yesterday who told me about the party when I was inviting her for my daughter birthday party, he is doing it the night before mine, she told me. I did send ex husband a WhatsApp message about the invitation for her birthday party prior going to visit his mother but retracted it (msg had not been opened so not read) when I learned that he did not bother inviting me (childish I know). I should not be surprised that he is doing that but it really hurt me. No one to talk about it.

I think you are in a very small minority here.
Co-parenting doesn't equal "doing everything together as a family unit". You are divorced.
It is pretty strange to want to spend your Christmas day / Christmas dinner with someone you are divorced from.

Being 'amicable' is being able to be in the same place for those important occasions for your dc - so their graduation, their wedding, maybe a start turn in a concert or play or presentation evening at school. However, the idea of having two separate parties is generally quite appealing for ordinary birthdays for most dc, as is the idea of getting two different Christmas celebrations each year.

As time moves on, it is quite possible either or both of you will have new partners and potentially be wanting to incorporate new family members - it can get very difficult if you are still insisting on being at everything.

Is it possible that he has a new partner and would like her to be at the birthday this year, therefore planning his own so as to not leave her out?

I do think you're taking it personally, which is understandable in a way, but not rational. You just know to plan your own celebrations/traditions in future and not go out of your way to invite him.

I have a partner and he has one. My partner has no issue of him being there for my children birthday. I don't know maybe you are right it could be his new girlfriend that is not happy with it however I don't know how long this relationship will last, in 4 years she is the 4th one. I never have any issue with 2 out of the 3 before her, first one yes as he had an affair with her when we were married. Number 2 and 3 are nice girls and I did get on well with them, number 4 don't know her so can't comment he is not living with her and they only see each other every second weekend as she is living far away.