Has anyone noticed the bulling going on here?

[pinatainoaxaca]

It seems there are some people who don't have anything better to do. There is some nasty bullying on this site, by a certain group of individuals. They stick together like glue and make idiotic and rude remarks. I am disgusted by these people and quite frankly, have had enough.

They must have so very big issures if they can insult people like they do and not realise that its hurtful and very respectful to others.

I find this a bit confusing, I have never seen any bullying on here. I have never been made to feel less valid for bottlefeeding DS and having a routine. I am new but have never felt anything less than welcome.

I took a break for a bit recently when I got annoyed about a thread but it wasn't anything personal about me or bullying or anything, it just was a thread that annoyed me far more than it would normally so I took a break because my personal reaction to it concerned me and I thought some time off would be a good idea. Which it was.

I do get puzzled when there are threads like this saying about bullying or oldies v newbies, unless I am missing something, which I doubt as I spend so much time on here!

Well I am pleased that I posted my thread about the divide as it actually turned my head and changed my opinion. If I hadn't of posted it I don't think I would have explored the whole of MN and reflected on the whole community that we have here and would have just stuck with my original blinkered view. I hope the OP comes to the same opinion that i have come to.

I think that there are two different issues.

The first is that if you ask for advice or comment you can't really be shocked if people disagree.

I have, over the last few months seen OPs getting very huffy when people disagree with them. Not in a nasty way, or hectoring but just disagreeing. Some have gone on to say that they will leave MN. Which is sad.

But if you just want people to agree with you, don't ask for advice.

The other things is that on MN as in RL people will tend to take more notice of other posters if they know their past history.

For example, because I've been posting for a while, I know that Tamum is an expert in genetics. If she posts something on genetics, I will tend to take more notice of her, than someone who I don't know. Not because I don't like the new person, but because I simply don't know their track record. If that person carries on posting I may very well grow to value their advice as much as Tamum's. An that isn't being in a clique, it is just using information that I have on her that I have picked up over the years.

i don;t think the OP coming back

tis a hit post and run

Personally I like a good bulling but, only in private, not shared with the whole of mn

all sound advice!

I think there is, very occasionally, something rather unpleasant and playgroundy (I know there's no such word but there should be) on MN. I mean when someone starts a thread that basically says "Come on over here and take the piss out of another poster." But as far as I can see, MN isn't one of those "you take care of yourself, hon" type mummy sites and it's all the better for it. But perhaps I've missed something recently.

'the first time I posted I was ignored, and then a regular made exactly the same point and there followed heaps of congratulatory posts. '

TBH, I'm one of MN's oldest members and that happens to me regularly! Its not a newbie thing its a MN thing- just the way the board is. PLease dont take it eprsonally.

Sometimes there are threads where people pile in a bit- usually thats in defence of someone (and very wonderful when you're on the receiving end as I have been twice), I guess if you're the one who is on the 'other' side then it might not be so good- BUT all the times I ahev experienced it the aim has been to defend against an unnecessary atatck. That's a good thing surely?

I've never seen genuine bullying on MN.

fark off Peachy!

I'm in Hekates clique!

{ps did you get the list of newbies that we are shunning next week?????}

MB I sent the bloody list

And a few oldies (you're on it aren't you?)

makes mental note to add HeKate to the list as well for next time

Show off!

Jeez, when I think how many threads I've killed in my time.

Right MB - see, you're already on our list, Peach...

But seriously.

It is awful to think that there are people who use MN that feel there is bullying going on. Personally, I just don't see it. I DO see arguments, I see oversensitivity at times, I see people who think that when they are not agreed with they are being attacked, I see people with a misunderstood sense of humour.....I also see random flashes of bitchyness from time to time.

But bullying is "repeated oppression, psychological or physical, of a less powerful person by a more powerful person" and I just don't see it, I really really don't.

Arguing about something is not the same as targeting an individual and trying to destroy them. Are people really feeling that is happening on MN? Because I'd like to be pointed to such a thread, I'd report it.

How can the OP be bullied, has only posted on one other thread aside from this, and only today?

perhaps she has changed her name or perhaps she has not quite understood the nature of forims

imho, the only person qualified to comment on the bulling would be heifer!

HAHAHA!!

er, ahem, I mean...

you dirty girl!!

oi, you sayin' stuff 'bout me?

I think you are mistaking bullying for some brutal home truths.

Some posts on here are so ridiculous that you do just want to tell them to get a grip.

Some are more constructive and some will agree.

You get the full range of viewpoints on here just like you would in real life.

Some of your friends will tell you to shut up, some will say it politely a few minutes/days later and others will just nod and agree.

I posted relatively mildly the other day and had abuse hurled at me - I wished her well and left the thread, because it became clear she had bigger issues than me.

I have a hat with the name of every MNer in it and I choose a different one each week to bully. Doesn't everyone?

well quite.

AIBU My friend had dd on a play date and lost her paper hankie. I'm cross AIBU?

'Yes, grow up!'

And if all they want is agreement, why post in AIBU?

Aw Hunker. Now I want to start a thread asking which MNers you'd invite to your Birthday Table!!

Yeah - i've seen that loads. people post about the most stupid things and i despair at the fact that no-one seems to want to make a decision by themselves.

It's called being a 'faffer' and there are a hell of a lot of them fawning over things they have/haven't done on here.

"Please help! My baby has just fallen on the floor - what should i do........."

That kind of shit.