Gin and a moat

[paxillin]

Not by one of the Queens this time... But we can drink here.

It won't be CO2 then... I don't think even you could flog a brew 'sparkling' with methane, hydrogen sulphide or whatever.

Yeah . . . that's what I thought if I thought I could have got away with methane-infused prosecco I would obviously have gone for it

People will buy it. There is a fish. Kids buy lollies with roaches and worms in, I doubt they de-pooped them.

Mmm - you may be right Pax - I wonder if I couldincororate a hairy-Naked_Molerat into the ices lolly version? We seem to have quite a lot of them flitting about since the Harpies became extinct.

I hadn't realised what a sterling (if raucous) job they were doing keeping the vermin down to manageable numbers. Oddly enough it never crossed miming to wonder why we never had feed the Harpies. I thought they were eating the Toblerone or something.

*could incorporate, not couldincororate

*my mind, not miming

Crossed miming could be entertaining. Where do we fins a cross mime?

Find a mime and give an honest critique of their 'art' should do it.

But please don't. Even in Mortificado there must be some limits of taste and decency.

Really, we draw the line at miming? Best not cross the mime I s'pose...

I wouldn't cross the mime - he doesn't say anything about it, but there awesome very rude gestures . . .

No mimes. And (obviously) no clowns.

Oh did you upset the dragon again, pax?

Are you suuure about no clowns? Because I found one outside and the dragonlets are smitten, they're asking if we can keep him.

Er... they didn't ask 'can Mr Bigfeet stay for dinner?'. They said 'Can we have Mr Bigfeet for dinner'.

Either way, just say no.

Oh. I can't imagine all that polyester is good for their tummies so I'll get schadenfraude to tell them no. Are you sure we can't keep him though? He seems quite tame, I think he might be a stray. We should give him some food, what do clowns eat?!

Give him some moat bouillabaisse. I don't imagine clowns are choosy.

FFS don't feed the clown - we'll never get rid of him, and the next thing you know the place will be swarming with the big-footed blighters, tooting "comedy"horns behind us and giving us a shock, and pulling flags all nations out of their trousers!

Do you know how many of them can hide in the average family car? HUNDREDS! That's how many - and you think you've drowned them all in a bucket and it turns out that it only held pieces of shiny coloured paper and they all laugh at you and squirt you with their "joke" buttonhole flowers.

No - we've had some nasty infestations in Mortificado, but I'd quite honestly rather have the swarms of Harpies back.

Clowns may look cute but they carry more diseases than merchant bankers!

I already fed him. It's just one clown. I think he's also a dentist.

Get rid of him.

Ge rid of him now.

There are too many things with teeth here - we want their teeth too rotten to bite with, not shining and strong.

He already fixed the goose and we've decided to keep him. BUT he seems to have attracted another. Little help shooing it away?

That do the trick?

Guess we're having clown for tea...

Nah, I just singed his bottom and he ran off in his big flappy shoes while another one threw custard pies to extinguish him. Despite appearances, I think they have more sense than to come back. Especially not if they're custardy - dragons won't eat clown but you really wouldn't want one of us licking pie off you.

Goose then?

Aw did you scare off mr bigfeet too?

Mr bitey just got new dentures, he's having a whale of a time, it'd be cruel to eat him now. I did confiscate some stray custard pies from the dragonlets though, any takers? It's far too late for them to have sugar, I can't be doing with another trip to the burn ward. Pretty sure I saw another clown there too... do they travel in packs or something?