If mumsnetters were all Enid Blyton characters....

[welliemum]

.... what would we post about?

Chat: My children have just been kidnapped again by international jewellery thieves. I do hope they are rescued in time for tea.

Behaviour/development: My daughter is athletic, assertive and extremely capable at everything she sets her hand to. I am so worried about her. How can I get her to wear a dress and simper like her darling cousin Anne?

Style: I have a super hat. It's blue with a bell on top. I'm thinking of teaming this with a red jumper and a yellow scarf, any thoughts?

[damewashalot]

Secret island, children living with horrible aunt and uncle parents missing asumed dead, run away to island with Jack(?) and live there build a house out of sticks and grow food.
In the end they find out parents not dead and they all go to live with them.

[damewashalot]

There is a bit of hiding from people looking for them and they have chickens and a cow.

[yellowvan]

Floating, are you thinking of Dame Slap, (now renamed dame Snap) in the Faraway Tree?
"If yellow Van ate 23 biscuits, what colour socks does her ds wear on a tuesday? " Try and get that one past an Ofsted inspector....

[misdee]

TMMJ thats first form at malory towers. oh i have been laughing at it. didnt read propelryu without the slapping of gwen though.

and having £10 for a term. wasnt it 10 shillings?

[slowreader]

Secret Island:
3 middle class children, (2 girls + boy) one working class (Jack I think).
MCC's parents lost in plane crash- live with awful aunt made to work like slaves etc. Friends with wcb (the beaten one- lives with wicked farmer).
Runaway to blissful Island in the middle of a lake. Take with them boat, chickens, swim cow across. Build a willow house out of living willow twigs for summer, cave for winter (of course) trade wild strawberries etc for necessities of life + books, Christmas presents etc on mainland. Various adventures, parents reappear, Jack adopted into family. Back to boarding school for everyone I presume and nothing ever quite as good again.

[slowreader]

sorry damewashalot you beat me to it.

[misdee]

oh you are right, it is £5 note

[damewashalot]

They do have lots more exciting adventure secret of spiggy holes etc.

[damewashalot]

Dame slap is in wishing chair and faraway tree and the wishing chair goes to the farawy tree at some point,)I don't remember this but was told so by a very excited ds1 " The wishing chair is at the faraway tree and I've read that haven't I!!!!!"

[damewashalot]

me too, must do house work

[Greensleeves]

Wishing Chair also features Mr Grim's School for Bad Brownies

[yellowvan]

ohh, dame washalot, must try and get hold of the other w ch book, i love a bit of intertextuality!

How's mrs saucepan btw? still baking those pies???

[stleger]

I'd be a middle class mother who has a housekeeper, a gardener and a lady from the village to help with heavy work. And I'd look after the dinner gong.

[Blandmum]

Chat How big is your mysterious island?

Behaviour/development All the children call my son Fatty, should I reduce his intake of hard bioled eggs and lashings of ginger beer?

Education Where can you buy a trunk for school these days?

Food Tuck boxes, I want to put in one chocolate biscuit but that bloody school says they have to be fruit bars!

[RosaLuxembourg]

My 10-year-old daughter is very naughty and we can't seem to keep a governess longer than a week because of all the silly tricks she plays on them. Naturally I don't punish her, these governesses ought to be able to stand up for themselves.
However, my husband has been asked to go to America for a year and I want to go with him but I can't possibly take Elizabeth - my nerves wouldn't stand it - can anyone recommend a very laid back boarding schools where the children run the show and there is no possibility of them actually expelling her and us being stuck with her again.