Swagger Inn Thread 142 - in which the holidays are over and we're back to normal perving hours

[SisterHelenoftheEternalCatchUp]

Questions:

1. Why doesn't my office look like this?

What an absolute utter fuckwit Madame

JLM seems to be doing some sort of exercise here

Watching The Hobbit part 2. Thranduil. Kili. That is all.

Ooooh killi 😞❤️
I think it might have been ep 21 Madame
Just watched the GN show - JLM came across very well - and I liked his socks!
RC looks really weird - all botoxed up and shit
Prefer JLM with hair but he did look hot in his suit
I've been re watching being human again
Too - hal (Damien moloney) is pretty lush

Here he is...

What a bastard Madame

I packed up a lot of books, feels more cosy now

Well hellllllooooooooo Damien, long time no see I do love it when he becomes vampire Hal & goes all superior

for badders to dull the annoyance of your DH & for ww for being such a good daughter.

Good news about the dentist apricot

Fresh sheets & clean pj's letus? There are few things nicer, especially if you have a long soak in the bath before getting into bed. Well maybe a long soak in the bath before climbing into bed with Aramis - not sure I'd care about the state or the sheets or my nightwear in that case

OIT!!!!!! MRMADAME Stop being a complete bellend

IKEA with you would be a dream come true Bads

Long soak in a hot bath before bed with fresh sheets, I remember that How I wish I had a bathtub!

Oooh yeah
When he wears his military uniform in flashbacks - phwoar!
Lord Hal the hbf 😀

wicked do you still not have a bath?! Is this a normal thing where you live- not having baths?

Madame - what the other said, with bells on. Suggest poking two red hot needles into TB's temples, and then tell him to make an effort Or just get DS to blow a high pitched whistle loudly and constantly in his ears for 12 hours, and then point out that he's not making enough of an effort.

JLM was on the Chris Evans show (with the others) last week - they were talking about him being a super fit runner/martial arts person. He said he got into running in the 90s - to recover from the 90s, so I suspect there was a certain amount of over-indulgence going on.

I'm not sure if it's because I mostly lived in small places and there's only been room for a shower, but showers seams to be quite popular. But I think if you live in a larger house/flat there's usually a bath as well but not always. The last time I had a bathtub was a about 15 years ago when I rented a council flat.

I would be miserable without a bath.

G'day cobbers

Why are men such massive dicks at times? It's routinely acknowledged by everyone ever that kids party days are massive stress and should be finished with a takeaway and vat of wine with whisky chasers. Hardly the time for snippy comments and bellendery. .

I do worry about the males of the species. Especially my own. I nearly vomited in a pair of trainers I found in a corner of ds2's room today, the smell of them was absolutely grotesque. I just threw them straight out the window. They're still out there.

In other news I had a proper TB dream last night. He featured in his chubbed up Strike coat 😄. I was gobbing on to someone about how I'd liked him before everyone else had realised he was so fabulous and it turned into him leaning on the car looking across to me (as in the filming photos) and laughing saying that he knew that but I really ought not to get riled with the fact everyone knows him now. It then went a bit odd and turned into us looking round the Haworth vicarage for a location for a new radio play (erm.... stooopid Comtess, why would they go on location for Radio you daft cow). Unfortunately, at no time did I get to get my hands inside the big coat. Wasted.

Sorry to hear it's cold and foggy etc. Erm, I'll not tell you the weather here.

at comtess's wasted dream. At least you had some chat and something nice to look at. I had a random one in your house, but I can't remember anything except:

1. you were irish (WTF?!)
2. I think I was chatting with at least one of your DSs
3. you weren't actually there

(I wrote this last night so I'm just cut and pasting from notes so this won't make sense btw but I had no wifi so couldn't post)

What the actual fuck is going on with Mayhem and Trump?!?!? I just cannot believe WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK is happening and every time I look at the papers online HE'S DONE SOMETHING ELSE. I know this is all blindingly obvious but THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD HAS GONE FUCKING DERANGED. When can someone just say that waterboarding is ok actually cos we are doing tit for tat.

HE CANT EVEN DO A PROPER FUCKING PRESS CONFERENCE.

Raaaaaaaahhhhhhh.

I don't like the real world any more. I want to go and live in Poldark world and take my chances in Cornwall. Or Musketeers Land. Nipple tweaking seems better than water boarding.

Well that was a wasted dream wasn't it? When I read that he was leaning across the car I thought - hello, I know where this is going . But no

I've just looked out the window. The trainers are still out there in the garden approx 18 hrs after being lobbed out along with a smelly gym bag.

Although I shouldn't really, it's fundamentally depressing that so many people could vote for such a repulsive orange fucknugget. Makes me want to hide under a blanket with an hbf until it all goes away.

Ah so promising Fancy, yes I will try and think about a proper car scenario. Oddly I think that Tracey chevalier was there at Haworth as I'd heard her on some Bronte thing on the radio, but in the dream she looked like Lucy Worsley the historic palaces woman.

You seriously don't expect him to go & fetch them in do you comtess? Or are you surprised that none of the local wildlife has chewed them?

Hel arf at your dream round at my house. Was it Oz? I can do quite a good Irish accent as used to have Dubliner flat mate. I'm sure one of my offspring would have been chatting you up

Well I can't really criticise your dream, as my subconscious never decides to pick someone I actually want to shag to have a hot dream about

Well, no, I didn't really expect much to be done except I know his gym pass and locker key are in the bag so I thought that might make him sort it 😄. I'm sure he'll be off to the gym tonight so that should be amusing.

I might add that I got a fair bit of welly on the throw with the bag and it's gone quite a way. New Olympic sport?

Yes that will be amusing to watch.

I'd be up for bag throwing as a sport, I was a pretty good welly wanger in my day. And a moderate egg thrower. I was fucking awesome at the three legged race with one of my friends - if only that had been an Olympic sport

Also might add that as you know a fair bit of sporty stuff goes on here. Mr C has beautifully organised laundry system in utility room with 2 washing machines and baskets for gym stuff to go straight in. Plus has trays and sprays for trainers all set up. It's impressively well thought out. So dumping stinky stuff is just lazy and rude. Mr C usually undresses from gym in utility, sorts out kit, and walks up to shower in the buff ; a system I'm keen to exploit with some amusing embarrassment at some point. Ripe for some trap I'm sure.