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My dog is making my life a misery. I think I should get the vet to put him to sleep : (

84 replies

dogtired · 04/02/2007 11:51

He is 8, dp and I have had him since a puppy. I now have a one year old with quadraplegic cerebral palsy. My life is very stressful. My dog, a labradar, is great in every way apart from he regularly goes for other dogs. I cannot take him on lead walks around the neighbourhood, or in fact anywhere on the lead as this exacerbates his agression. I have to haul him off to a huge common where he can go off lead and avoid other dogs. He does not stalk dogs, but will attack if they get too close, also if he's on a lead will go ballistic if he sees another dog.

I have done EVERYTHING to stop this behaviour. I even became a dog walker for a couple of years to try to socialise him. He actually loves dogs he knows, and he loved coming dog walking with me once he knew the other dogs. But the behaviour with strange dogs never stopped. I did everything two "emminent" dog psychologists told me to - but no joy. His problem is fear aggression - he is scared of dogs he doesn't know so attacks defensively. He has never hurt another dog, but it sounds awful, frightens everyone who's around, is intensley embarrassing and has pulled my son over in pushchair a couple of times. I dread taking him out and I cannot hold on to him if he kicks off on the lead.

I have a lot of experience of dogs and I know this problem is genetic, there is nothing anyone can do about it. He was from a rescue home as part of a litter from a Welsh puppy farm.

I'm fed up, I can't take him anywhere, when I do, I'm a bag of nerves. It's become a real problem and is restricting my life more than it already is (which is a lot if you have a child with sn).

He's an absolutely lovely dog otherwise, never barks, is beautiful and loves people (as long as they're not shouty bouncy toddlers who scare him).

I'm on the verge of asking the vet to come and put him to sleep. I feel absolutely awful. Guilty. A failure.

OP posts:
sunnywong · 04/02/2007 11:52

bye bye, Fido

You don't need the stress, send him to the vet

dogtired · 04/02/2007 11:54

Yesterday I was attempting to have a nice coffee with my son sat outside a cafe, a dog walked past which I didn't spot quick enough and he threw himself at it, knocking over a table

OP posts:
Pinotmum · 04/02/2007 11:55

It is not possible to re-home him? I think you have enough to deal with by the sounds of things. Have you spoken to the vet to see if they have any suggestions.

dogtired · 04/02/2007 11:56

My partner loves him and would be very upset. I tried to talk to him about it yesterday but he says he'd feel too guilty (he Catholic and guilt is an issue with him..) even though he understands.

OP posts:
Pinotmum · 04/02/2007 11:57

He'd be hard to re-home wouldn't he. I think you know you've tried everything so don't feel bad about the v-e-t.

dogtired · 04/02/2007 11:57

I've contacted the RSPCA and the local dogs homes and lab rehoming places, but they never get back to me, they're full I guess.

Also I don't know who would cope with him.

OP posts:
JustUsTwo · 04/02/2007 11:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pirategirl · 04/02/2007 11:59

hiya,
I have experience of something similar and can understand where you're at.

It would be best to rehome him, you have tried your best. Your nerves are important and your wellbeing for the sake of yourself and your child.

Yuo've probably come to 'that place' that decision anyhow by posting.

I had to rehome a nightmare cat, i felt awful, but the relief was immense. My dd was upset for months but i kNow it was the best thing for the cat, as i could not give him anymore time. I think he was not 'quite right' and upset as i was to make the decision, i knew it was best.

good luck

winestein · 04/02/2007 11:59

I agree, it sounds like you don't need the additional stress DT.

However, I'd hate to think a vet would put a healthy dog down (I know mine wouldn't). Is there a rehoming centre near you? Whereabouts are you? There must be plenty of people who don't have everything you have to deal with on a daily basis who would be able to manage your dog.

You really are not a failure, and you mustn't feel guilty.

JustUsTwo · 04/02/2007 12:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

winestein · 04/02/2007 12:00

x-posts, sorry

WanderingTrolley · 04/02/2007 12:01

The correct term has been unaccountably deleted from my vocabulary, but has he had his bollocks whopped off?

If so, alas, but he does need to relocate.

Start by telling him the delights of Battersea.

Not meaning to make light of your prob - you've enough on your plate. You are not a failure and you have nothing to feel guilty about.

But the dog needs to go.

Sorry.

JustUsTwo · 04/02/2007 12:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WanderingTrolley · 04/02/2007 12:03

NEUTERED

that was it

Pinotmum · 04/02/2007 12:04

Please don't class yourself as a failure. You've tried everything. If you can't re-home him then he'll have to be put to sleep as you can't keep him.

dogtired · 04/02/2007 12:05

You won't believe this but I used to work in a rehoming centre, and take my dog in to work with me when he was very young. His fear aggression became too much though and he got "sacked" after attacking a poorly Boxer. I had him neutered when he was a few months old.

I just know he would cope very badly in a rehoming centre, also because he's so handsome I think he'd probably go to someone who didn't understand fully what he's like. I just envisage stress for him and then he'd be put to sleep anyway...

OP posts:
brimfull · 04/02/2007 12:11

Would your vet do it ,have you checked with them?

dogtired · 04/02/2007 12:14

this is so hard. Dp's going to be very very upset with me. The thought of upsetting him was the one thing stopping me calling the vet last week. I don't know if the vet would put him to sleep, I've not asked them yet. I don't want to lie and make out that he's worse than he is, (would add to my guilt), so maybe they won't? Then I'd be back to square one.

I might try phoning round the rehoming centres again. They're all on answer phone though.

OP posts:
dogtired · 04/02/2007 12:48

Well managed to get through to 2 centres. Neither would consider taking him. Guess that's it then

OP posts:
winestein · 04/02/2007 12:48

Wait until tomorrow to phone - I don't think many of them will do much over the weekend which may be why you are just getting answerphones.

Have you spoken to as many re-homing centres as possible? Have you seen all these?

winestein · 04/02/2007 12:51

These are cut and paste from a link on Catchat (a website which lists my local animal charity).

LABRADORS:
Labrador Lifeline Trust, (Surrey/Berks/Hants) Tel: 01725 516969, Web: www.labrador-lifeline.co.uk

(SOUTHERN ENGLAND) Labrador Retriever Rescue, covering: sussex, hampshire, kent, surrey, middx, berks, oxon, herts, london ~ Tel: 01243 605948, Web: www.labrador-rescue.org.uk

(SOUTHERN ENGLAND & SOUTH WALES) Labrador Rescue Trust: rescue and rehoming of unwanted and ill treated labradors. Registered Charity no: 1088198, Tel: 07791 519084, Web: www.labrador-rescue.com

(YORKSHIRE) Labrador Rescue ~ Tel: 0114 266 1756

Whereabouts in the country are you? I'd love to be able to help you. You sound desperate

dogtired · 04/02/2007 12:52

Thank you for those numbers and links. I'm in Surrey

OP posts:
3andnomore · 04/02/2007 12:53

dogtired, would you possibly consider rehoming him privately? If so, maybe my Inlaws would be willing to take him. They had to put their dog down last year . I know my MIL really would like another dog, and he would have a good life.
Also, if you would consider it...whereabouts are you actually?

3andnomore · 04/02/2007 12:54

ooops x-posted

winestein · 04/02/2007 12:55

have you tried this place?