quick thread, anyone still up & online?

[Dixie]

anyone there just for a chat?

Dixie

It seems that there is a few of us that could easily get to Bluewater, perhaps we could do a minimeet up and all go out for lunch when you are feeling better? Anyone else up for that?

Dixie, so glad you're getting the shopping problem sorted out, and it sounds like you have a good HV who's on the ball.

I'm not that far from Bluewater, too, and could drive down to there or somewhere nearer you. I have already sent you my email address via mumsnet. Please give me a shout if and when it suits you.

Tigermoth

Message withdrawn

Dixie
Been reading your messages. Big hug to you. I'm about an hour from Bluewater, so if you're going to need lots of shoulders to cry on, I'd be more than happy to come.
(And no, I'm not tempted by mention of cake at all...... at all....!!)

Just a quick hello to let you all know I'm coping as well as I can...I am finding it extremely hard & soooo tiring. I am in tears most of the time but have some strong 'pull myself together' moments too. My husband has said it is a definite thing & I've 'got to accept it that he just doesn't love me anymore & it's over'. So now I'm in 'single mother mode' - just what am I entitled to....he doesn't earn much as it is...I was supplementing the income by working part-time, I don't think I will be able to continue work but unsure at moment...Any mumsnetters know anything about what I can get to help me financially either way...I need to know EVERYTHING...I contacted the citzen's advice bureau but they couldn't tell me anything concrete.

Dixie - contact the National Council for One Parent Families - get no from Directory Enqs. They will give you loads of useful stuff. Good luck.

Dixie, do you and your husband own your home or do you rent?

I really don't know what the financial situation is if you own it. I'm sure another mumsnetter can probably explain though.

If it is rented, you can claim Income Support, Housing Benefit and Council Tax Benefit. You will need to go to the local office of the Benefits Agency (look in phone book if you don't know where it is already), they will give you a claim pack for all three things.

If you're not working and your home is an appropriate size for your family (basically no spare bedrooms) then you will get 100% of your rent paid, and 100% of your Council Tax.

Hth, so glad to hear you're okay. Still thinking of you! love Mopsy xx

Dixie, I'm sure the national council for one parent families is the right organisation to contact, as Tinker says. Also, the charity Gingerbread might be able to offer advice.

Our local council has a service offering general financial advice - not just benefits related. I have used this in the past and it is most useful. Really recommend this. If you contact your town hall, they can tell you is there's one that serves your area.

Hope this helps. Keep going, you'll get there.

Contact the Benefits Agency and they will be able to tell you exactly what you are entitled to, again this should be in your local directory. No matter what he is earning, he should be paying you maintenance, you might need to see a solicitor to find out how much you are entitled to. Most solicitors give a free half hours consultation and you will be entitled to legal aid.

Dunno, he sounds like a pig, but he could be having a nervous breakdown. My dh (albeit before we were married) once told me he didn't know if he loved me anymore, just out of the blue! I sat up most of the night crying, but he didn't comfort me. Then in the morning he left and posted the keys through the front door. I went crazy! But he was having a mini-breakdown and now I understand his actions. It could be that, or maybe he just isn't worthy of you. But it's good that you are now in 'single-parent' mode, much better than moping around hoping that he will come back. Take action now and you will find the strength come to you, we all have an enormous amount of inner strength and you must use this to get through the next few months.

Please do keep in touch to let us know how you are.

glad your ok x

Anyone up then?

Yes, I'm up! DP has gone out and I've got unlimited use of the PC and the vodka!

Whopper! My dh is out and I've got unlimited use of red wine and Baileys! Mind you, it is my turn to get up in the morning so I shouldn't go mad, well not really!

Hehehehe Baileys! I once helped run a pub and the other girl involved was a bit po-faced. She was down in the dumps one day and said nothing gets met drunk what can I do? I got her wrecked on Baileys - not a pretty sight!

Noooooo, I once threw up on Bailey's, that wasn't a pretty sight either! Nicer going down the other way I say! But I do like Vodka too, what are you mixing it with?

Diet coke. Just a habit I suppose cos I'm still overweight LOL. Where are you? Living, I mean, not whereabouts in the house!

Diet coke. Just a habit I suppose cos I'm still overweight LOL. Where are you? Living, I mean, not whereabouts in the house!

Ooops! Pressed refresh B4 the back button!

LOL! Sounds like a chat room doesn't it? I'm in Preston. I liked Vodka and lemondade myself. A double before job interviews, very nice!

I do that all the time!

Refresh I mean, not double vodkas! long, long time ago that was!

Aaah, Preston. I once went on a coach to Blackpool with my ex-DP. There was delays around Birmingham and the driver called out "Anyone got connections in Preston?" My ex replied "I had an uncle lived there once but he got run over!" I loved Blackpool then but went back around 1990 and it had gone a bit scrungy. Has it improved?

I'm in (fairly) central London - Finsbury Park. Had Oasis on our doorstep (literally 500 yds away) for 3 nights last weekend.

Preston is fairly dire. Lots of suicides from bus station. I like London but wouldn't live there. No offence but it's too rushed, I like this calm, tranquil sort of life. Northerners don't rush anything, no ambition you could say, but people say hello to you at bus stops and that's nice. Is it busy where you live?

Well, we have suicide bridge (Archway Road, 100 ft drop) fairly nearby but it is not used very often, maybe twice a year. What is the special attraction for yr. bus station then?

Where I live now is fairly quiet, quite community spirited as its the "other side" of the park and nearer to Crouch End which is really posh. But going the other way it isn't so nice, bedsit land and a lot of asylum seekers hotels. Quite a lot of money is being put into the area for improvements tho' and some new things for kids are being funded.

Bus station is very high and has a reputation! We live in a nice area near the river but also near the brothels and drug dens which is not so nice!

Ooops, dh is home so have to go and make light conversation whilst he rambles drunkenly, nice chattying MandyD - take care and cheers!