Kirsty Allsopp says ditch university and have baby by 27

[Prettyinbeige]

www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2014/jun/02/kirstie-allsop-young-women-ditch-university-baby-by-27

I know it's different for everyone but I completely agree with this article.

For me having my son at 22 was the best thing I ever did. It made me a much stronger and more confident person, which then in turn has helped me in pursuing a career and building a life for us.
I think I would have found things a lot harder if I had built a career and a life to then have to sacrifice it in order to have a baby.

I also understand in some cases it isn't possible for people to have children before a certain age. But I guess what I'm saying is I see some sense in what Kirsty is saying

I see her point about fertility dropping having experienced this!

She is of course looking at it from her own viewpoint. For me the most important thing about going to University was that it took me away from the narrow world I had grown up in; I would have had quite a different life had I stayed and found a job near my childhood home.

I agree that the window of opportunity for education is lifelong, but I am so grateful that in adolescence and early adulthood I had the opportunity to spread my wings. Just shows that if you are rich you have more choice!

I graduated uni at 21. Bought flat with DH at 23. Married at 27. Had DS at 28. Back at work with part time hours. Seems to be going ok. When DH career settles down a bit (he is self employed) we will look to move somewhere bigger and have a 2nd DC. Am now feeling like I have accomplished a lot! The career has not been that amazing TBH it has coincided with the recession and I think that has stalled things. My advice is stop worrying and start living.
I do recognize I am lucky to have met DH early. Which wouldn't have happened if I hadn't gone to uni. I think uni also gives you an extra 3 years breathing space to think about what you want to do when you grow up. I might have wasted this important thinking time getting drunk and kissing unsuitable boys

The problem about scaring women by claiming 'fertility falls off a cliff in your 30s, you need to have babies in your 20s!' is that there is a sharp increase in women in their 40s or late 30s having unplanned pregnancies. Because everyone's got the 'message' that fertility declines, they are being caught out... moral panic about 'career-obsessed women ignoring their evolutionary destiny' is misleading people and causing real problems.

After what she said to me on Twitter I know where she can go.

Having children young without an education/career/training is a poverty trap.

yep. this. Have a peruse of the relationships or lone parents board and consider how difficult it is for young mums. Idiotic advice from KA. You can't predict how things will turn out - childcare, finance, relationship. Be in the strongest financial position for yourself before bringing DC into the world. My tuppence worth.

Yes MrsJoe to being in a strong financial position - not an issue for Allsopp.

In that case Pretty, I think you've misunderstood what KA is saying.

If a couple want to have children why is it always the woman's career and earning potential that have to suffer?
Why can't men take an equal hit?
Having children young has many health benefits for mothers and children but it holds women back in other ways and perpetuates the patriarchal system.

Children benefit society as a whole, but mothers bear most of the cost.

Kirsty Allsop is a silly bint and Ive lost all respect for her!

Right, this is how it will work when the revolution comes and the Tories are up against the wall I'm in charge.

Only top 5-10% of school leavers (in terms of results AND motivation) go straight to university.

Reintroduce apprenticeships so that vocational courses such as accountancy are financed principally by the companies that benefit, not by taxpayers

Spend the money saved on massively expanding further education provision.

Change the expectation that a degree means three years' solid study. Massively increase opportunities for part-time / evening / day release study.

Everyone has a time bank that builds up time for further education, say a month or two for every year in full employment (pro rata for part timers). The time accrued can be spent at the employee's discretion and can be converted into parental leave. A similar system is in place in France, so it can work if the political will is there.

Lose respect for Kirsty?
Couldn't possibly, never had any to begin with, she's a silly posh lightweight

She combines all the worst Tory traits. Quite right, why should it be the woman that sacrifices her career?

In my extended family we have a SAHD. His wife had the career so took the absolute minimum ML.

The rhetoric about women having to choose between career and parenthood is just a mechanism which serves to prevent women from accessing power and status.

In order to compete with men most women would have to forgo having children, and risk being labeled somehow lacking in 'normal' female instincts.

Well I am sure Nigel and Ukip agree. Stop women cluttering up the workplace with their demands for maternity leave.

I had my first child in my late 20s and personally wouldn't have wanted 'the fear' of parenthood before then. I thought this the other day when one of my kids fell a few metres and ended up in hospital. Because your kids are so precious to you that brings so much worry and responsibility. So I guess I value the selfish years! I will be hoping my daughter does a lot of the things I did-whether that be backpacking round SE Asia, working abroad in exciting cities, clubbing in Ibiza etc etc. All the while I will worry about her but I absolutely want her to have fun (and a career and babies if she wants them)

I did a degree, than a postgrad and then had a baby at 25 and never went to work LOL

Not sure whether it's wise to wade into this debate but here goes!

I think every woman should ideally do her utmost to be financially independent or at least have the qualifications/experience to get a job to allow her to be, before she commits to a long-term relationship with children if she chooses to do so. These days so many relationships split (and judging by the Relationship boards here, split acrimoniously or with the man being a complete toad) and most of the time the woman is left with limited financial help and all the children.

Having children before getting a career or at least a secure job would be a disaster for so many women. If you are left high and dry at home with the kids or the school runs and no real earning power, how on earth do you then have time to study full-time for 3-4 years to get a degree, and then you have to get a starter job in the chosen field. Guess who would get priority? People with no kids and/or the ability to work silly hours.

The only way women can protect themselves and their children is to get the training and relevant experience before they have said children, then if (as in a third of cases) things go pear-shaped, they will still have that safety net.

Kirstie is in cloud-cuckoo land.

My life order was degree, masters, PhD, postdoc, serious boyfriend, house at 30, marriage at 37 and finally DS when I was 40 and jobwise fairly senior and secure. Worked for us, and we were extremely lucky to have a choice over at least some of the timings! Yes we might not have been able to have children that late, but we were prepared for that to be the case and took the risk.

I have a friend who had children at 24 and has struggled and struggled to get the training she needed after she and DH split. Her DC are now teens and she is still broke and single. I expect she would like to say a few words to KA.

Kirsty is cluttering up the airwaves yalking about weddings on R4 right now. The Daily Mash has it.

I am so glad this nugget of wisdom arrived before DD1 could actually take up her medical school place and shrivel her ovaries... Shall disbar her forthwith from all that useless book-learnin. Who needs doctors with degrees? She can just make it up later.

Is it me or does she just look exactly like some other high-profile wind-up merchant never out of the news? With the same political allegiances?

Can hear her now re weddings. Oxygen thief.

Yalking? talking!

She was definitely yalking.

I had my first child at 25 after my degree, and frankly wish I'd waited a few more years. Waiting till 33 would have enabled me to get a footing on some sort of career ladder. As it is I'm making it up as I go along trying to fit anything I do in around children.

Don't we all just make it up as we go along though duchesse??

who has a 'plan'? Who's life goes to plan??

Plenty of my university friends. Some of them quite a few actually very high-profile now. The rest of us feeling like utter underachievers.

But crucially most of those are blokes and/or have remained childless or had children late.