White Lies

[Freddiecat]

Influenced by Miggy's post in the TV right or wrong thread.

What white lies have you told your children?

Also what white lies did your parents tell you and when did you suss out the truth?

In our first house we didn't have a chimney so I was concerned how Santa would get in. My mum told me they would leave the backdoor unlocked. It was only a couple of years ago that I asked my mum whether they had actually left the door unlocked! (they did not of course)

Later my mum's handbag was stolen from the kitchen whilst we were all in the house and the neighbour found the contents scattered all over the road. My mum didn't want us to be scared because theives had been in the house whilst we were there so she said she's left it on the roof of the car when we got in the car after swimming. It struck me as a bit strange even age 6 that the handbag would stay on the roof for 10 miles and then fall off in our road - but my mum only confessed recently.

i bought dd a pumpkin this yaer and then thought she might actually get spooked so we didn't do it and i told her "It's ot Halloween yet!" (she's 2.8) Last week she saw the pumpkin hiding still in the kitchen and said "oh mammy is it Halloween yet?" So we had a smily pumpkin in our garden in December

Not too proud of this, but I "cured" ds1's terrible eating habits by telling him that the monsters would gobble him up if he didn't eat all his breakfast/dinner/tea. This is still work in progress, but he usually clears his plate then sighs "now they won't gobble me up".
God knows how much therapy he'll need in 20 yrs time.

I was going to send them to a childrens home-once even packed ds's bag and went with him to an empty delapidated house and he was going to stay there coz he was naughtyhe said he was going to be good-cruel but effective.

Asked about what are condoms (when too tiny to understand) they are a hat for a helmet.(not really a lie then)

doormat!

Salt!

I DO tell my kids that the ice-cream van plays his tune when he has run out of ice-cream

I remember Simon Mayo saying that on his Radio show years ago and I thought to myself - "mmm, that's a good line for when I have children"

Oh, so many of these are familiar! My father used to telephone the childcatcher (from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang) to come and take us away if we had been naughty. Used to scare us silly.

I have a friend who found her mother's vibrator, and was told that it was for headaches. Whenever she had a headache she used to go and get it from her mother's room and turn it on and place it against her forehead. Bet her mother regretted that one!

when I was pg with no 5, I had a craving for fresh orange everyday and ordered bottles off the milkman.Found it was going pretty quick so asked who was taking it-no answer.(trivial I know but it was a craving)
This was going on for weeks-the phantom orange guzzler-so one day waited for kids to come home from school and asked who had taken the orange-no answer again.
I then told the kids that it wasnt orange but a urine test to take to the hospital
dd1 puked up instantly

Our apartment car park is in the basement and there are some noisy air vents/fans down there that kick in every so often. DD doesn't really like them so I told her they were the friendly dragon who guards our cars. For some reason, to her 20 month old thinking, she thinks a dragon is preferable to an air vent!