Tea room 16 welcome to Shangri-la

[UniS]

Shangri-la = a hidden valley with beautiful views and crystal streams of course, and some inter-far eastern type of chalet things set around a Serene Courtyard with ever-blooming Japanese cherry trees, lots of refreshing fragrant teas, silk cushions, tinkling tiny waterfalls and bonsai trees, Gardens of Tranquillity etc.

Home to teh 16th Tea room, a haven for those with one or more or less children who like cake, tea, talking nonsense and oggling Mellors ( our handyman/ butler). If its your first vist, pull up a cushion .Mind out for the guinea pigs and other pets and do take care not to squash the teeny tiny naked mowhawk babies ( nmbs
, no longer naked and now toilet trained you will glad to hear)as they go about their duties helping Mellors.

Confused... come on, jump in and have a hot chocolate.

Thumbwitch, I have spoken to the parents of the other children. Generally the other children say they like DD and they don't know why this one girl is causing trouble. I've emailed the head, asking that they are not in the same class next year (they aren't this year, but will be next year), and asking her advice on what to do about what I described as "deliberate and systematic bullying". Will see what response I get - she'll probably suggest a meeting.

oh scout- sorry to hear you are having "big blue funnel" troubles. That was what I used to call a certain type of guider who made life difficult at camp. I once and only once blew up at one of them on camp. I was a ranger at the time on a ranger district or county camp and I objected VERY strongly to being called stupid. As in " don't be stupid girl" when I ( with hind sight, impetuously) suggested we went and tried out the orienteering course RIGHT NOW, in the rain at dusk.

I had history with that particular leader.. as did my mum ( also a leader) we didn;t see eye to eye on much. She seemed to think young ladies should be sat on their bums doing craft. My unit was more into treasure hunts, camping, cooking, swimming and pantomimes.

ohhh forgot - re badges. I collect cloth badges, ideal would be a national centenary " worn on uniform" cloth badge if one exists , like the round red "75 in 85" badge I wore on my uniform back in the day. but I'd settle for any cloth one.

My trade patch stash is looking a bit random, I can offer- lost gardens of Heligan, Interlaken- embroidered picture of lake steamer with mountains in back ground, random football shaped one with a cup, Union flag, black and gold Blazer badge from Syd Lawrence orchestra, or a black n white Brittany cross. Or maybe you would prefer some gloves and mittens for baby scout for winter.

Having bored you all sense less Can I try and revive you with a dish of twiglet surprise with extra radishes and chocolate chips.

Big Blue Funnel. I LOVE it! I know exactly the type of leader you mean. It's leaders like that that give us all a bad name. I am a cool, fun leader (at least I like to think so). I have been a leader since I was 17 (though only an ass't from 18-22 while I was in uni). I grew a Junior Troop (equivelent to Guides here) from 6 to 28 in one year because all of the Brownies wanted to come to me when they heard about all of the fun things we did. I have been outdoor cooking since I was a Junior and have been planning and/or executing camp menus since I was a Cadette (aged 12). I did all of my GGUK qualfications within two years of arriving (Leader, QM, Nightsaway Camping, Nightsaway Indoor -- don't have large scale First Aid one but really should do it). Call me eager or just say I have a clue! ARGH!

Feel a bit sick at telling my unit guider (who is a friend) that I want to bail out as she knows I do whatever is asked of me and even stuff that's not, but I fear there will be major scenes if I don't.

Would one of these be good, UniS? I have a couple of them around, just need to dig them out (bought loads to send to friends/family back home). Will be happy with any badge you'd like to send!

that would be perfect scout, just the kind I was hoping for.

www.uk.unicyclist.com/swum21-hockey10.html at bottom of page you will find some contact details . drop us line or txt and we can do an swop of snail mail addys.

'evening all!

Still on holiday. Fantastic! Been to loads of places, & have continued to horrify the maid service for the villas with our behaviour, which I shall not detail here but which may include not getting out of bed

Promise I'll catch up properly when back...

ooooo, amber.

Amber ! That'll be burning off the calories from the fried breakfasts

I'd tell her the shove it Scout - you don't need more stress in your life, and she needs to learn to be nice to people who volunteer with her, else they won't play.

Have been away at a conference this week - nice to see some people I hadn't talked to in a while. Came home to a washing mountain though

Anyone for pimms ?

Scout - do you need anything from the US ? Will be over there next week, and will have suitcase room for stuff if you have any cravings ?

Mmm, Pimms.

Oh, CMOT, that's a very kind offer! I might just take you up on that.

DH brought home flowers tonight. Is very sweet of him.

I've got the munchies -- are there any snacks lying around?

twiglets, wasabi peas, or cheesy biscuits ?

Ooooh err, missus.

Have been following the guiding strand of this conversation with great interest. The truth that dare not speak its name here is that in guiding (much like anywhere else, I guess) there are women who do selflessly give their time week after week year after year but who are, in the way they treat other guiders, utter moos. Oh so I've heard. Nobody like that in our district, oh no. Ahem.

Is there anyone, Scout, who might tell this old trout rude woman to wind her neck in (a lovely expression I have learnt from MN)? Will your unit leader be able to act as a buffer zone between you and her at camp? If not, you probably would be right to bail out. If you're feeling fragile after treatment you don't need the added stress of dealing with the guider from hell.

UniS - It's not exactly what you're looking for, but I have spares of a Guide fundraising sew-on badge for Haiti. Would you like one?

Mary - A meeting is the obvious course, but make sure you've swotted up on the school's anti-bullying policy and can tell them how you expect it to be implemented. I've forgotten - does your dd have a statement of SEN too? If so, perhaps the SENCO can help as the teacher doesn't seem to have cracked it yet.

Would anyone like some Bolly to go with UniS's twiglet and radish surprise?

Cheesy biscuits, please. (Twiglets taste like burnt bark.)

Ooops. Cross-posts while I type at the speed of a less than agile snail.

I am in the process of writing a letter to my unit guider -- might I pass it on to you wise women for review? I fear my American bluntness could be causing some friction?

Go for it Scout - Will appraise happily for you.

Mary - I hope your DD's Head comes up with something useful and at least keeps her apart from that girl.

Cheesy twiglets please, with Pimms & bolly (I have done that before, not bolly admittedly, but a cava - we ran out of mixer and it was the only fizz left! How I didn't die of alcohol poisoning I'll never know, but I didn't even have a hangover! )

Thanks, thumb. I had DH look over it as well and have sent it, but please let me know how you read it (all names have been changed!):

Hi Mrs Guider,

I've finally been able to open the attachment of Madam Guiders's menu. I still have questions/concerns, but feel that I can't go to Madam Guider with them after yesterday. I thought sleeping on it and I'd feel better (which is what usually happens) but I almost feel worse. I feel I have no control over the kitchen, that my
suggestions/opinions are not considered and that I have been personally
attacked. Comments regarding "can you cook breakfast" and I "should have asked
if I didn't know what something was" and the peanut butter & jelly comment have
stung more than I let on yesterday but I feel they were way out of order. I
have kept quiet since the start of the process, thinking that everyone has their
own style and Madam Guider's is just different but I don't feel I should bite my tongue any more.

I am struggling -- with the menu, the process, the feeling of lack of control
over what is meant to be my contribution to camp. In my experience, both here
and at home, if you've been asked to take the lead in something, you do
everything from start to finish. I have been more than happy and willing to do
everything required for QM but offers have been shot down, suggestions ignored,
questions met with scorn/frustration. It seems in meetings, when new topics
have been brought up, all I hear from Madam Guider is "We do things this way, how do you
do it, oh well, we'll do it our way." I feel incredibly micromanaged and
redundant. I honestly don't know what to do any more.

The last few weeks I had been questioning my sanity, wondering if I really
should be QMing with all I'll be dealing with in August (BabyScout's first camp and
camping so soon after treatments begin). Yesterday has left me thinking that I
should just walk away from it. I haven't yet because I made a promise to you
and to the girls and I try to keep my promises. I don't even feel that I can
write/leave "to do" lists for QM because I feel I don't have any idea what's
going on. Sure, there's the standard build fire, get kettle on for
coffees/teas, but beyond that I'm lost. Yes, I know that's a bit dramatic as I
know things like get cereal out, butter bread, put out spreads, but things like
this haybox? I haven't a clue and quite honestly don't like the sound of it --
when Madam Guider said about having to "check for bugs" I shuddered and still shudder thinking about it.

I'm looking for guidance/advice on how to get these things, in addition to my
new questions/same concerns regarding the menu, across to Madam Guider without sending
her off on one again. Or do I bite my tongue again, not say anything and
struggle through? Honestly, if she comes after me again I'm feeling fragile
enough to throw in the QM towel and just go to camp to help you/the girls.

I'm sorry to have dumped all of that on you. My goal is not to add more to your
burdens (and I certainly don't want to stress you out!) but I am looking for
advice so that I can look forward to camp again (because right now I'm not),

As always, many thanks for your help and advice Mrs Guider!

Hi all!

Small and CMOT have a look at your emails, trying to sort Saturday meet and anyone? anyone? (Bueller) who is around on Sat and wants to join, let me know

do you know email for Tea who is languishing inLondon I think?

RAcing I will look into 22 at work for our meet

Went to local party, drank, need to sleep. Little more to say except
scout it is meant ot be good fun and enjoyable - ditch if not. Iknow nothing aoubt scouts, etc but that is true of life

Mistle I am miserable for your DD. can you work with her for a solutoin? Think you are right to swop teachers/ classes

SCout - that looks perfectly reasonable and completely understandable as an email - I assume MrsGuider is a sensible sane woman (unlike MadamGuider)? Anyway - you've put it out there, see what response you get but I'd still, if I were you, look at backing out of it. YOu have valid reasons, and if anything IS said to the old caaaahh, she might make more trouble for you or make the atmosphere even more unpleasant - so I don't think you can win either way. Sorry.

Mrs Guider is a very sensible woman. Bit of an old school Guider in a lot of ways, but very open to new ideas, new ways of thinking and doing things, etc. She is my friend and is BabyScout's adopted grandma. I know, I worry about atmosphere as well. And it's eight days of camping. You learn a lot about people when you camp with them (some people you learn more about than others ).

Good night, all. Thank you for listening to me whinge today!

Well I hope she has some good advice for you Scout - I'm glad she's nice. She might also tell you to step away from the camp though!

Am of the London meetup - feeling a touch more isolated than normal at the mo, probably because MrThumb has been away - but he's back this afternoon and no doubt I'll be annoyed by something he's doing by evening!

Ah thumb. Sorry you feel isolated. It's not going to be so great meeting the others and they haven't replied yet so I may be all alone
if you fancy a chat email me. I'm outer now so you are welcome to join in