The One and Only Tea Room: Tea, muffins and champagne served at all hours

[BoccaDellaNativita]

Well folks, here we are!

We were on the brink of filling the old thread so I thought we'd better start a new one now. There was a rumour that we were going to be evicted from our old premises, but we managed right at the last minute to get an extension on the lease. So it's business as usual. We're still in our charming old tea room, overlooking our beautiful garden complete with ha-ha and duck pond. And Mellors the gardener.

Please come and join us for a celebratory drink.

Theye're apricot and coconut muffins (made with pineapple). They're gluten-free.

Yes, I am a recovering book hoarder. I now give old ones to the charity shop.

Those sound fab - do you have a recipe ?

I do give books to the charity shop. Unfortunatly, I buy just as many back again. Fortunatly we have a vast amount of book shelving now, although DH is trying to invade my office with his books, so we may be running low again

Well, it's Annabel Karmel's recipe. Thanks to the wonders of the tea room - I like to think we are in the realms of magical realism here - I had retrospectively removed the flour and substituted whatever one must to make a recipe gluten-free.

No shame in retrospective conversion. Thanks to the wonders of the tea room, I realised that I can indulge in gluteny treats to my heart (and stomachs)content

I'll search online for the recipe - as a confirmed slummy mummy I did BLW, and so have no child food cookbooks

Hah! The very mention of Annabel Karmel "my children lurve liver" (yes, sweetie, we believe you) and here I am!

I had resorted to stalking Bocca on other threads to find my way back to the tea room, as I've been awol for 4 weeks of r and r in the lovely UK.....

Hope the tea room is functioning at its best. I shan't partake of a muffin today as I have a (literal) bucket of maltesers awaiting me.....x

The interview with her and her 18 year old was rather interesting - here

Nice to see you back Bucharest. Any chance of a malteser

Hah! The tempting bait of an Annabel Karmel muffin has been enough to entice Bucharest back to the tea room!

Lovely to see you again, Bucharest. Come stai?

I've never had a stalker before. It makes me feel I have arrived. (And yes, this is a joke, as I know how creepy and threatening being stalked for real can be.) Now that the soi-disant MN royalty have decamped to a rival establishment, I shall develop delusions of grandeur!

Crikey.

" We were chatting in the kitchen and I said, "It's good you've got all these recipes written down. Because when you're married, your wife will be able to cook the same food you had at home, and your children will be able to cook it and it will live on." And that's a nice thought - that my kids, and then their kids, will be eating Annabel Karmel meals. ..."

I used several of AK's books but, crikey again. I will say no more for fear that the lawyers will be called in as they were, ahem, once before.

Boak.
I missed the decamping. Had I better not ask?

AK doesn't annoy me half as much as MS or indeed DS. (Bucharest hides behind initial letters remembering "the other time")

Oh no, dear. (Thinks: it's been too long since I called anybody dear). We only decamped because the other thread was full. The reference to m'learned friends was in connection with that other time.

Bocca- don't mean us decamping....I mean the mass decamping of MNers to "somewhere else".

MS- likes to serve plates of food to smalls disguised as rocket ships....(nutternutternutter)

DS- likes a swig of the old cooking sherry before the match.

OK, have got DS. Now working on MS.

There are probably a dozen threads by now devoted to the mass decamping. What happened (as best I can grasp it) is that some longstanding MNers were worried about being stalked (as happened to Cod, the doyenne of the style and beauty topic) and also (allegedly) that all the riff-raff who had joined MN more recently than them were getting in the way of their jolly chats. So they have gone off to a board called Moldies which was set up at that other time, just in case MN collapsed under the weight of litigation, and where membership is by invitation only. People are nominated by existing Moldies and may or may not be accepted. Rather like a gentleman's club. Some people (apparently and allegedly) have a foot in both camps.

Anyway, as far as I know, none of the tea room customers has left to go to Moldies. The fuss seems pretty much to have died down now.

Now to cheerier things - who'd like a piece of cake?

Thank you for that succinct and informative resume!
I won't have a piece of cake ta, as I've just eaten half a chocolate orange.....

MS has ex husband who shag(ged?) Felicity "the bottom" Kendal.....She's also very anti breastfeeding. (it is apparently just a turn on for the mother)

(hmmm, wonder how many more famous people I can insult today)

I'm beginning to suspect that I've never actually crossed paths with MS.

MS's last name sounds like decellerating quickly. First name like Mary M

Hio Bocca- Hi all. I suspect DH would be going for Audax as in "bloody long way" bike rides. He MAy see it as an excuse to try and get a third bike again I supose, but hes got a perfectly good touring machine.

So THAT was what teh moldies references else where were about, it must have happened while I was busy in RL. SUCH a shame I missed it all
Fresh baked rolls on teh table for you ladies. Had to make some this morning or we'd have had no lunch. were VERY yum still warm with honey. Went some way to making today a bit better. HOW am I ever going to get boy to preschool on time 3 days a week, I can barely get him to teh childrens centre at the bottom of teh road by 9am for play group one day a week. Does it get easier, this getting them out of bed and breakfasted AND dressed AND out teh door lark.

Just checking out what has been happening while I was out today and found two Freecycle messages in my inbox. "Wanted: Sky Digiboxes in working order." "Offered: Bin bag of shredded paper."

It started me thinking what would enhance life here at Chateau Racing and what I would be prepared to offer in exchange.

"Wanted: Two-acre field and small woodland with pond" "Offered: One left sock and a carrier bag of unsolicited catagues."

"Wanted: Car large enough to fit in shopping, push chair and toddler with large boot for scavanging impromptu recycling, with free petrol." "Offered: bin bag full of cast off clothes with interesting stains on the front."

Off now to see who has been added to our creche full of national treasures. I see them all sitting round together, gossiping, looking round occasionally to say, "Oh look, here comes Tony!" (Benn, not Blair.)

Freecycle is a very strange institution, I think. My own contribution would be:

Wanted: Full-time services of fully qualified builder, plumber, decorator and joiner for an indefinite period (possibly up to 3 years). Payment to be made in tea and biscuits only.

Offered: Contents of the box under the sink where I put the unidentified bits of plastic which drop off household appliances.

Wanted: Villa in southern France. (Italy acceptable as a substitute). Must have own swimming pool and extensive land.

Offered: Bag of unripe tomatoes from allotment. Most slug damage removed.

As for national treasures, there is a rival another thread in similar vein. Conditions there are more restrictive (living women only may be nominated) but it's certainly worth a look.

Anyone for champagne? Gin and (if you insist) tonic? Twiglets?

I like Freecycle - ours isn't too weird, and it's amazing what gets offered. Currently people seem to be reducing their manure heaps and building raised gardens though.

DS insisting today that Daddy had gone to London as it was on fire. For some reason he had worked DH going into London with 'Londons Burning'. Who knows.

Champagne, no Twiglets please. I'll donate mine to RacingPig

oh... thqnks cmot!!! I don't mind if I do.... yum yum!!!!

UniS - Sorry to ignore your question about the pre-school/school run.

I was always very disorganised relaxed about what time we got to play groups. As they were so informal, I reckoned that, as long as we got there before the biscuits ran out, it was fine. When we progressed to pre-school, which had a formal start to the morning with news and a story, I surprised myself by very quickly getting into the groove and we developed a fairly slick routine. It probably helped that preschool was a short drive away - it was because the play groups were on our door step that I used to faff about or decide to do some shopping en route. And the same with school really - because I don't want my hapless child to suffer the ignominy of being in The Late Book, I drag us both out of the house in reasonable time. And it does get easier for other reasons: the older BabyBocca got, the keener she was to get there to see her friends and the more she could do to get herself ready.

Of course, there are still plenty of mornings when I have to yell recite the mantra "have you brushed your teeth? where is your hairband? is your homework in your bag? where is your PE kit? DO IT NOW!"

sorry - obviously I meant 'thanks' but wigglesnake started stroking my head which made typing a bit tricky!

I tell you - The things us guini-pigs have to put up with. You Mothers' of one have no idea!

RacingPig, I am so impressed by your punctuation. Guinea pigs are obviously underrated in so many ways. I am immediately instructing Wrigglesnake to stop carrying you around by the neck and making sure you are provided with suitable reading matter at all times.

Just checking what you have all been talking about today. My daughter (2.5) really does love liver and today has eaten only cabbage for supper. (Am not going to mention any hula hoops or chocolate buttons that may have been consumed and if RacingPig knows what is good for him he won't either.)

Racingpig is clearly a well-educated and thoughtful chap (or chapess? has that ever been resolved?)

Thinking of the menagerie: has anyone fed, watered or exercised Earl Grey today?