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Original poster

Teacher hit me

277 replies

AdaUserName92 · 12/09/2023 15:23

So my son just started nursery, he is 3 and this was his settling in week. Everything was going well until the last couple of days he done home and said his teacher and another senior member of staff hislt him and threw him. On those two days he came hone super angry and change in behaviour. I've withdrawn him from the school. Has anyone had such experience and reported to ofsted and safeguarding bodies? What was the outcome?

OP posts:
Taketurn · 12/09/2023 16:11

Kindofcrunchy · 12/09/2023 15:31

My 3 year old says ridiculous things like this that obviously aren't true. You've withdrawn him already?!

Obviously not true? So you just believe it isn't true without even investigating? WOW.

Justcallmebebes · 12/09/2023 16:11

I'd speak to the nursery before making any rash decisions

My 4 Yr old GC accused her mum of dragging her across the floor by her hair. It was witnessed. She simply guided her to a chair with her palm flat on GC's shoulder

Prepgrw · 12/09/2023 16:18

I’d talk it through some more with your child. My own child in infant school said something similar. I approached the staff member concerned in a very friendly way to try and see their reaction . Their face said it all and the staff member knew my child talked to me, in an honest and detailed way. I didn’t approach the head as I had my reasons.

Prepgrw · 12/09/2023 16:19

This was years ago, not recently when people listen to children more now.

LakeTiticaca · 12/09/2023 16:27

Not saying your child is lying OP have you actually asked the nursery for clarification?
Small children can and do tell lies or get confused and are not able to put context into things.
When I was about 7 my 5 year old sister told her teacher that I was dead 😯
(Wishful thinking perhaps?)

adriftinadenofvipers · 12/09/2023 16:27

I would be viewing this with a hefty degree of scepticism. It's incredibly unlikely that two members of staff would have assaulted him. It's not impossible, but it's improbable.

Can I, as someone who has reared three children to adulthood, give you a little advice? Approach these things with an open mind because small children aren't very good with facts.

Your job is to listen to your child, reassure them, then talk to the nursery staff and establish the facts.

I learned this early too. My then 4 year old came home and said they had punched another child in the stomach. I went in, mortified, to speak to the teacher. It never happened.

Justleaveitblankthen · 12/09/2023 16:34

At three, how does he even know about hitting and the vocabulary surrounding it?
It's not something he was born knowing.

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 12/09/2023 16:36

Myneighboursarewankers · 12/09/2023 15:52

Ignore everyone who’s saying he’s making it up. I actually witnessed this happen at a nursery when I was collecting my child (my child wasn’t hit someone else’s was). I put in a complaint and they reviewed the cctv and we had a netting about it (assuming staff member was fired but I don’t know as I took my child out also). It does happen. I don’t know if the parent ever found out though as I didn’t know who she was to tell her

You actually witnessed two separate members of staff hitting and throwing a child?

BananaSlug · 12/09/2023 16:47

Isn’t it interesting that if the child went to school and said mum hit me no one would be saying the child made it up and was obviously lying 🙄 it would all be “children don’t lie about being hit”

Original poster
AdaUserName92 · 12/09/2023 16:50

Thanks for the interest. The question is very specific. It doesnt ask for opinions on whether my child is telling the truth or should I speak to the nursery etc. It also deliberately very limited in information so not here for the gossip. If you can't answer the question specifically please don't populate this post unnecessarily and keep your personal opinions to yourself as they are not wanted.

Shout out to the parent who reported another child being hit! We need more eyes like yours and not to mention bravery.

Sorry for all those little babes who need to persuade their caregiver before they get supported. Precisely why toxic cultures survive in these places!

OP posts:
PaminaMozart · 12/09/2023 16:57

I'm still curious to know what the nursery's take on the incident is?

YourNameGoesHere · 12/09/2023 16:58

PaminaMozart · 12/09/2023 16:57

I'm still curious to know what the nursery's take on the incident is?

Likewise but it doesn't seem like the OP has even spoken too them so I guess all we've got to go on is the word of a 3 year old who was likely exaggerating in the hope he'd get to stay home with mummy for longer, looks like he got his wish.

MaybeanothertimeNotReally · 12/09/2023 17:01

Ofsted would expect you to go through the complaints process of the educational setting first before asking them to investigate. That's the standard procedure, you should book an appointment to discuss the incident with the nursery manager.

Shinyandnew1 · 12/09/2023 17:02

I would be following the nursery complains procedure which I’m sure you’ve now looked at. The first thing in it will presumably be to speak to the nursery as the first port of call.

MaybeanothertimeNotReally · 12/09/2023 17:03

Posted too soon. Speak to the nursery first to find out what actually happened. Then decide whether there is a case for Ofsted to investigate. If you don't do this, Ofsted will bat it back to the nursery because you need to speak to them first.

inigomontoyahwillcox · 12/09/2023 17:03

It might be true, just like it might not be true, and you can withdraw your child from nursery for any reason you like, it's not like they have to be in education at that age. But I think it was a bit rash not to make some inquiries or do some investigation first.

fabmaccawhackythumbsaloft · 12/09/2023 17:04

No but I've dealt with such allegations.

It turned out the staff member the child accused wasn't actually even present

Tread very carefully op. You need the full facts before wading in all guns blazing

I would not take for gospel the word of a 3 year old without speaking to the nursery about it first or you may end up with egg on your face

I say this also as a parent who once went in because my son told me he had been tied to a tree by another pupil

It didn't happen . He then so "oh it might have been a dream "😵‍💫

I felt very silly .

Insommmmnia · 12/09/2023 17:10

If you can't answer the question specifically please don't populate this post unnecessarily and keep your personal opinions to yourself as they are not wanted.

That's not how the forum works

rainbowstardrops · 12/09/2023 17:10

No I haven't experienced this or reported it to Ofsted because if my child came home with allegations of that nature, my first thoughts would be to speak to the nursery.
I assume you have?

CurlewKate · 12/09/2023 17:11

I don't think anyone is suggesting the OP's child is lying. Well, I'm not. I'm suggesting that the OP should have both sides of the story-keeping the child at home if that seems appropriate. OFSTED will expect her to have done this. Apart from anything else, if something bad has happened, she has given the nursery more time to perfect their story.

Itick8outof10boxes · 12/09/2023 17:18

OP is coming across as a bit hostile to comments, and not even answered as to if she has spoken to the nursery.
I'll probably get moaned at for saying that. [shrugs]

HarrietJet · 12/09/2023 17:19

Kindofcrunchy · 12/09/2023 15:45

I'll bet your son threw something and got told off for it.

Far more likely. Didn't you even speak to them before withdrawing your child, op?!

Helpmepleaseimbusy · 12/09/2023 17:20

AdaUserName92 · 12/09/2023 16:50

Thanks for the interest. The question is very specific. It doesnt ask for opinions on whether my child is telling the truth or should I speak to the nursery etc. It also deliberately very limited in information so not here for the gossip. If you can't answer the question specifically please don't populate this post unnecessarily and keep your personal opinions to yourself as they are not wanted.

Shout out to the parent who reported another child being hit! We need more eyes like yours and not to mention bravery.

Sorry for all those little babes who need to persuade their caregiver before they get supported. Precisely why toxic cultures survive in these places!

Wow. Talking about toxic cultures when your post reeks of toxicity.

HarrietJet · 12/09/2023 17:20

AdaUserName92 · 12/09/2023 16:50

Thanks for the interest. The question is very specific. It doesnt ask for opinions on whether my child is telling the truth or should I speak to the nursery etc. It also deliberately very limited in information so not here for the gossip. If you can't answer the question specifically please don't populate this post unnecessarily and keep your personal opinions to yourself as they are not wanted.

Shout out to the parent who reported another child being hit! We need more eyes like yours and not to mention bravery.

Sorry for all those little babes who need to persuade their caregiver before they get supported. Precisely why toxic cultures survive in these places!

You sound utterly ridiculous.

HakunaMatiłda · 12/09/2023 17:22

Shhhh everyone before you’re sent to the naughty step for sharing unwanted personal opinions.