15 YO compulsively eating during the night! HELP

[ladybird2024]

I am very worried about my sons weight and health, he has adhd and suspected autism he has been referred.

His sleep is really bad he is awake most of the night and sleeps till 12-1pm he’s been given melatonin but it didn’t work and then he point blank refused to take it anymore because it didn’t help. His eating is getting out of hand, he will cook food when I’m asleep and his siblings are asleep, he will steal all the treats and eat all the food in the cupboards and fridge, I got locks for the fridge and for the treat cupboard and it worked for a while but now he’s some how when I’m asleep finding the key and stealing the food, I’ve woken up this morning and he’s eaten the rest of the pasta from dinner, he eaten a whole bag of sweets and has eaten other things it’s costing me a fortune in food a week as I have to keep topping up, I stopped buying freezer food because he just cooks it in the night when we are asleep, I have spoken to him about this but he just says he’s hungry, he don’t go without and I feel it’s just greed. At his last adhd meds review he was weighed and I was really shocked because he shouldn’t weigh what he weighs at 15 his body is full of stretch marks because of the rapid weight gain and I’m worried about his health. I don’t know what else to do? I’ve spoken to his adhd nurse and she said it’s one of the traits of adhd impulsive tendencies and that his meds should help as they suppress the appetite, thing is as soon as they wear off he binge eats during the night. It’s always the crap foods, I could stop buying them but then it’s not fair on the other siblings as they have to go without.

He also doesn’t go out, so doesn’t get any exercise he don’t have friends he can go out with or anything like that he literally sits in doors all the time, I’ve spoken to him about me and him going to the gym together but he has no intention of doing that and said no and I cannot physically make him. I’ve suggested clubs he could do but he’s not interested in them either. I’m stuck at what to do? Can anyone help me or give me some advice? has anyone else been through this with their child?

Please do not comment if it’s nasty, sarcastic or just not needed as I’m genuinely concerned for my son’s health and don’t know what else to do.

I’ve had appointments with CAMHS but they discharged him because he wouldn’t talk in the first meeting, I’ve asked for counselling but he has point blank refused to go because he said it’s pointless and he don’t need it, he’s had other therapies and went for a bit but then refused. I think the eating is defo comfort eating.

I’ve noticed today that he has used a knife to peel the lock of the fridge and get into without having the key so that’s how he’s been accessing food at night when I’m asleep.

I could try this actually, thank you.

I’m going to speak to the ADHD nurse and GP about this.

What does he do indoors while you guys are out?

He will watch tv, play games or he will sit on his phone.

ND children often don’t because fruit texture and taste is not always the same. They might eat an apple that is mushy and it put them off. My DD is like this

Discharging him after one CAMHS meeting seems drastic of them - kids take time to open up - especially ND kids.

He's not able to limit
his use of these and so you'll need to intervene. He needs to widen his world. Get him out the house, into a sport, into a hobby, and reward him with screens.

also greek
yoghurts good for protein.

Yep I said this to them but he got discharged because he wouldn’t talk.

I have tried this, he don’t want to go out and point blank refuses. He don’t like crowds and lots of people he gets very irritable.

The tone of this and your subsequent posts is so unpleasant, not to mention unhelpful.

Just the sort of thing which puts people off MN.

What is it with first responders who like to be unnecessarily nasty?

If he's on meds he needs lots of protein in the mornings before he takes them and then lots of protein at night when they wear off. I'm in them and if I don't do this I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm ravenous. I also have a child who does the same as your son. I've noticed that as her mental health improves, she eats less and moves more. I also stopped buying all treats etc.

Take the key to bed with you and also buy a box that you keep snacks in for your other children and take that to bed too!
I wouldn’t be allowing him anything to eat during the day if he’s eating at night

There’s plenty of them on here when there are genuine people asking for advice and help. You always get the odd few that have to use a certain tone.

Ok I’ll try this, I’ve done an online shop and I’ve not brought any treats this time. I’ve doubled the fruit and I’ve got lots of other items protein wise.

Took the key to bed last night he used a knife to get the lock of the fridge so he could access the fridge.

And Sen school is not an option? My DS went through a binge eating period btw 13-14 years old. I hid all treats in my room.

He still demands treats to calm his anxiety in the evening and I give him mr freeze lollies so not many calories and still get him his dopamine hits. He also takes Sertraline for ocd. Your son needs to get healthy habits and it starts with waking him up every morning so that he's tired in the evening.

No he went to a sen school and he didn’t get along there at all, it’s the classroom atmosphere he doesn’t do well in, he struggles with it. He will act up and refuse to do any work, which is why he is behind and is now home tutored and is doing a lot better. He has struggles with reading and writing and has a diagnosis of dyslexia, he doesn’t like that he cannot do things and feels ‘silly’ and that’s why he acts up. I have tried getting him up in the mornings but he will just go back off to sleep.

Lock the cupboards and fridge. All of them and put the key under your pillow or on a chain around your neck.

leave out water and some fruit for him if he wants to eat in the night. You can’t make him do anything but remove over stimulating things for when he is unsupervised at home.

and make him earn his tv/phone and console time with tasks or walks. Unplug the router and tv and take the cables to bed also. Lock it all away in your room during the day. He is bingeing and it will get worse and is dangerous to his health so you will have to be quite firm

Yes, I’m well aware.
I hope you can ignore such people. Easier said than done sometimes though.

Locked the fridge and the cupboards, he has used a knife to open the fridge and get into it, I have also taken the internet at night away before too and kept it in my room he still isn’t able to sleep during the night and is still awake.

I do think your instinct of speaking to his ADHD nurse is correct. If he's not getting up and not taking his meds until 12 or 1, they won't have worn off by nighttime, which explains why he's up all night. I think you need help finding a way to break that pattern.

Good luck, that sounds really difficult.

To be honest I wouldn’t let him sleep in until midday. I would get him up.
I would stop buying treats.
If I knew he was cooking ( and you don’t always) I would get up and make it stop.
The cycle to break is the eating in secret alone at night.
People eat for a range of reasons. Not just hunger. Although he says he is.
Can he take his medication at a different time of the day ? Does he need more of it if it wears off ?
I would be a bit ruthless in attempting to stop this and nip it in the bud. I wonder if he feels he has permission to do this as he has ADHD and has stopped wanting to stop doing this himself ? Impulsive doesn’t mean you have to act on it.

At least get take him in some water and medication to take in the morning then let him go back to sleep. Or take him in a breakfast sandwich to coax him up?

the protein smoothie someone suggested is also another good breakfast idea.