General chat thread

[OneFrenchEgg]

Hi all

I just thought, as I'm wandering shopping on my own, that I don't have everyday people to chat to - I didn't make school gate friends and I don't have work friends (work at home) although I like my colleagues and we do chat. Locally I realised I have no one to say hi to really or to ask to the cinema or for coffee.
So I thought - why don't we have a general chat thread? Like how's your day not disasters type thing?

I'll start - I made a start on Christmas shopping today which feels a bit daft. And I'm faffing round while my kids buy clothes until we meet at 5.30pm.

And then realised that this is supposed to be a positive thing!!
I've started my Xmas shopping and have a family WhatsApp group with deadlines for present suggestions 😆

An 11 hour work day 😲 wow I definitely can't concentrate or keep my enthusiasm for that long! I work in short tiny bursts and then have to reward myself - home working has been a relief 😂
It's funny with Christmas - once something sets me off I have to do it! Like a task.
Off for more uni visits at the weekend - one of mine is looking at the moment. Dh did one and has now delegated them all to me...

I would imagine many of us have many years of experience of being undiagnosed but knowing something isn’t right - that we just can’t do things that everyone else seems to just do/find easy.

So we can appreciate the relief you’re feeling.

Tbh, even after diagnosis I sometimes feel like an imposter and I don’t really have ADHD. Years of just thinking I was useless and lazy have lasting effects.

My toddler has discovered a new preschool horror on Disney+. We are having to watch some rubbish about buster the bus this morning. It’s terrible!

I'm so glad my kids are too old to inflict childrens tv on me
Very much relate to being an imposter especially when other people seem to have it so much worse.

Turns out the toddler is a bit of a grand designs fan. It features building work and many lorries/diggers/other stuff of interest when you’re 2. 🤣

Aw that's cute. My then toddler / reception age child was absolutely obsessed with something called 'Fat Families' which he must have seen somehow and then became glued to it via catch up. I have no idea why, we are all normal sized, not rude about peoples size or eating habits (either way) - it was just some weird phase he went through 😲

That is hilarious. Fat families! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Mine is ridiculously obsessed with things with wheels. Especially large vehicles. To the point that he’ll so through an hour of grand designs for the odd glimpse of a cement mixer. 🤣

Hello there. What a lovely thread. I lurk a lot.
I'm waiting on an appointment that may or may not happen in 2024... ish for ADHD but I am pretty sure for two reasons, well more than two but I beat a pretty horrible alcohol addiction (touch wood) 5 years ago and I have a great friend who I can be myself with who I don't have to pretend to be normal with and the relief is massive, Also my marriage is on very shaky grounds, my husband's fed up with my chaos and randomness. I'm in danger of oversharing so I'll leave it there. Also I am diagnosed dyslexic and one of my kids is dyspraxic - but at uni - so I'm very proud of him.

There is no way I'm even going to start Christmas shopping before the 1st of December - it's just too early.

I have a magnetic whiteboard on my fridge and menu plan based on what arrives in the veg box and we have a Lidl within 5 mins walking distance. Sometimes I batch cook but that's usually when I have surplus veg from the allotment which is my gainful employment now, since I walked out of my last job (I can be a bit hasty at times)

Anyway nice to read all about you :D

Hello welcome @jlpartnerrs and @20DigitCombination and anyone new x

I think it's that 'I've started so I'll finish' vibe with the shopping 😂
Love the patient waiting for a concrete mixer, none of mine have any patience for anything! Currently they are Dr Who fans - we did the Dr Who experience in the Summer which was amazing.
I'm tempted to think about meal planning again reading all your posts.

Thanks again for the welcome.
Can I ask about special interests? Do you have one/many/none? How long do they last? I think I've just found a new one after not having one for a while.

Do any of you have specific Christmas routines. I have specific requirements about decorating the tree😆

@jlpartnerrs over sharing is one of my downfalls too. So difficult to judge how much sharing is over sharing until it's too late!

Can I ask about special interests? Do you have one/many/none? How long do they last? I think I've just found a new one after not having one for a while.

I have many, because they never go away, so I have been collecting them for nearly 50 years.

Congratulations on finding a new one - it's a wonderful feeling when that happens, the special excitement is a unique sensation that it's hard to put into words.

Lovely thread, thank you @OneFrenchEgg

@jlpartnerrs I think that being a bit hasty, oversharing and struggling with addiction (of various kinds) are very common experiences for ADHD-ers

I only got my ADHD diagnosis about 8 weeks ago and am still working on getting my meds right. I've just jumped up to 50mg of Elvanse which is good so far. I haven't managed to complete my ASD assessment forms (they are soooo long!) but pretty sure I am autistic too

DH is on the waiting list for ASD / ADHD assessment as well. His mental health has been terrible but he has finally started seeing a counsellor and I am hoping that things will pick up for him soon

He and I have some rare child free time today while DS is at a respite play scheme. I am getting my covid booster and then we are going to the tip - rock and roll!

PS I do batch cook but can't cope with buying Christmas presents at all! I am a total last minute merchant!

Well done on all the admin and stuff post-diagnosis. I was diagnosed months ago and I still haven’t managed to even attempt the arranging the blood tests and ECG to consider medication.

I keep forgetting entirely. And then, when I remember, the thought of trying to persuade my GP surgery to sort this out is so off putting that I don’t even try. My GP totally dismissed me when I suggested that my MH issues were something far more than just depression and palmed me off with sertraline.

There is so much to organise to get the support we need, it's ridiculous! If I could do all that easily then I wouldn't need the bloody meds!

It took me about 2 years to contact the GP, and then a bit longer to get my blood pressure done. It is much easier now as I can just get it done at the pharmacy without an appointment - does yours offer this? I didn't have to have an ECG or blood tests so feel for you. Is there anyone who can help you organise this?

I have to organise it myself. So it may never happen. Maybe when I have the money to do it privately. The getting past NHS resistance is a barrier I have neither the persistence nor the willingness to achieve. I just can’t deal with having to justify asking for medical treatment for something I’ve been diagnosed with. I suspect they’ll just reject the private diagnosis and still refuse to refer me to NHS services.

Needing an ecg and blood tests is definitely an obstacle. It makes sense medically. But it’s not a straightforward thing for someone with ADHD to achieve.

I need a blood test to follow up an a and e visit but I can't face it. The whole ringing the surgery thing is exhausting.
Likewise any kind of chasing up things - new shower and the pump is horrendous but I can't face ringing.

Another weekend has passed where I've still not done any Christmas shopping. I have no idea what to buy people. My DSis always buys people lovely gifts, she has a knack of knowing what they'd like and they're always thoughtful. My mind goes blank. I also get a bit anxious receiving gifts.

Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays are all 11 hour days with breaks during the day and straight through from 4pm till 8/8.30. I'm absolutely bloody knackered and only took the day job because I was worried about the cost of living increase having an effect on my evening income as I work in what many would see as a luxury industry. None of my evening clients have left though - I've even increased prices and they now pay for more sessions at a time which I thought would weed out the less committed ones. I must be doing something right!

I'm the same with medical issues. I do manage to remember to order my repeat prescription (blood pressure meds) just about in time but anything else can take weeks or months for me to get around to, even if I'm suffering.

I'm the same! Shamefully I just give my nieces and nephew money / vouchers, and we don't do presents for adults. DH is a nightmare as he buys himself anything he wants and is very particular so there's no way I would get the right thing even if I had the patience to look (which I don't!)

I would love to get people really perfect presents but it just seems impossible. And I also don't really want presents either. DH's family get me Amazon vouchers which I absolutely love as I read a lot.

So, no advice and suggestions but lots of sympathy for you!

@Septemberbeginnings I think this is an area where the NHS should be more. I heard somewhere that people with ADHD have a reduced life expectancy - probably partly down to life style issues (addiction etc) but also due to difficulties in accessing the right medical support because of struggles with executive function.

I haven't been to the dentist in an embarrassingly long time because it just feels 'too much'

I had some time off recently and I managed to book my flu jab, covid booster and smear test - I was really proud of myself!

@AshGirl it took me years to book my latest smear test last year and I only managed that because I was at an appointment with the nurse for a blood pressure check up (overdue, as is my current one) and she made the appointment there and then. I also forget about appointments on the day, not just for me but the kids too.

The feeling of having achieved a few things in one go is great, isn't it? Just wish I could be like that all the time.

@AshGirl it's good to know I'm not alone, you also have my sympathy. The first hint you get that my extra fussy DH wants something is the Amazon parcel arriving