Baby at a concert

[Worrywort98]

Hi all
I have a 4 month old baby who's pretty chilled. I don't have family support, just me and my husband.

I recently booked a concert (classical music) for our one year wedding anniversary. It's in a small venue. I didn't even consider the fact that babies/children might not be allowed in until after I'd bought the tickets 🫠 and we've no one to babysit.

Should I still bring my baby?

I bought back row seats for swift exit.
He normally sleeps very well if I put him in the carrier. Recently I had to go to a funeral and he slept the whole service.

Please be kind but honest as to what I should do. Thanks

Thanks for this! 🙂

i still remember the films I saw with my 4 month old at the mother and baby screenings and she’s now 18 !

Thank you for sharing this, that's a positive story 👌

I can't imagine a venue accepting "well behaved babies" only, how on earth could that work?n It can't be nuanced 😂

Oh give over

I found a sling combined with a ‘baby wearing’ poncho was perfect for hiding small babies. Not quite a classical music concert, but mine have always slept throughout their siblings’ performances perfectly happily.

Tenacious D is different to classical music - different expectations of the audience too. I’ve taken my dc to many festivals at all ages but in this situation you’ve described, it would be a no for me. Not appropriate.

As a classical musician, I can only say I love people bringing kids to concerts. They're our future audience! You're right - a sleeping baby is much quieter than many audience members. If your baby cries, just leave quickly.

This!

First post nailed it - some things you don't take babies too

Comedian Katherine Ryan allows babes in arms at her evening shows.

Loads of babies and young children/toddlers at music festivals. They wear ear defenders.

I play in an orchestra. I'd be pleased to see a baby at a concert, as long as they were taken out if they made any noise. The worst concert I've been at as an audience member was when a parent in the row behind talked constantly through it, loudly explaining things to their child, it was terribly distracting and totally unnecessary as the kids seemed pretty well behaved. The parent was the problem. You do also get relaxed concerts for people who may need to move around, you could also look at them. Although as a player, the worst concert I've played has been a family one where the kids literally ran riot. It was absolutely the parents fault. I hope your child enjoys the concert, even if just for part of it.

Aw that's lovely to hear. It's funny how all the encouragement so far has been mostly from ones like yourself who are musicians and all the naysayers aren't

I agree children should be exposed to things, and a show is perfect. I wouldn’t take my baby to a classical music concert (and I love classical music), but then we go to see the LSO etc.

If it’s an amateur village concert in the afternoon, where it’s very chilled and tickets are free (or cost less than £5), then I might consider it.

Children should be exposed to things within reason, I wouldn’t take them to Wimbledon as a baby for example, doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want them to enjoy tennis in the future.

There are many ways in which to expose your child to music, but it doesn’t have to be at the expense of other’s enjoyment. We go to the baby Bach concerts, children’s shows, and play it at home. Once they start playing an instrument and have some knowledge to appreciate it, then we will take them to concerts.

Taking the baby out if it cries…. the damage is already done. I would be fuming if I’d paid good money for a concert and this happened.

Just please don’t. It’s completely selfish and inconsiderate. You’ve got a lifetime to take your kids to concerts when they can behave and there’s no risk of spoiling others’ enjoyment.

Yes. Very good point. So people who are used to being in the audience understand why this would be annoying.

in all honesty it sounds like you’re going to do whatever you want anyway so still wondering why you asked.

since you’re going to go I’d stand at the back by the doors so you can slip out when needed.

Actually you're wrong, I'm waiting to hear back from the venue to see if it's okay. If it isn't, then I won't. Read my other posts, I bought seats at the very back closest the exit.
If it is ok with the venue, I'm fully prepared to scoot out at the first squirm.
I'm just wondering why people are so up in arms about a baby taking up space in public esp if they're quiet/sleeping.

Yes, as a musician I've barely ever been an audience member, I wonder what that's like? 🙄🤣

God forbid some new parents take their baby out in public!

Fair 🤣 Honestly a silly thing to say (by me)

But it’s super annoying to go to a nice quiet concert to listen to a baby wiggling around. Have 0 issues with babies at festivals or concerts or restaurants or pubs or most places really, but for something I really want to hear 100% it’s really irritating to be interrupted. I have never known a 4 month old to just stay quiet for hours but maybe I just didn’t try hard enough to make it happen!

Honestly, I despair I really do. Going out in public generally and going to a classical concert that people have paid for are hardly the same thing.

So people that have paid 100 quid a ticket deserve to have an uninterrupted concert, but those that have paid fifteen quid don’t. How many times do you need telling. A concert is not the place for a baby.

I think you've probably been unaware of most babies tucked away at places, when you're all facing forwards as an audience. Unless sat close, people only notice the ones belonging to cheeky fuckers who don't take them out if they're crying, leading to confirmation bias.

You are talking to (mainly) parents on this thread. Trust me, your baby is only special to you. PFB is lovely, but being an entitled parent is exhausting for everybody else who has to deal with you.