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A new Neurodiversity support thread for those with suspected or diagnosed ASD, ADHD and other NDs

1000 replies

PigPigTrotters · 19/10/2016 17:32

Yet another thread for neurodivergent mumsnetters.

Lots of links in old threads.

Anyone is welcome, it's not just about autism.

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PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 12:51

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Albadross · 29/10/2016 12:56

I used to be glued to books (fiction or crime/occult as a child, but totally non-fiction now) so much I'd walk around still reading

PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 12:57

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PigPigTrotters · 29/10/2016 13:17

I read mostly stuff on the iPad, but I do tend to read all the time.
I find it strange that being on the iPad is seen as more unsociable than having your nose stuck in a book!

I've just finished a book that was recommended on MN, the seven daughters of eve, was like a dream read as each chapter led to some frenzied googling and reading more about the subject (eg, all pet Syrian hamsters originate from one female found in the 1930s!)

OP posts:
autisticrat · 29/10/2016 13:23

I know, you see people sitting using their phones on the train, in doctors' waiting rooms, in the evening sitting together in the living room, at the hairdresser's, possibly at breakfast, and people whinge, when fifty years ago it would have looked exactly the same, but with a newspaper or a magazine or a book instead of a phone or tablet. People just like to complain about things.

It's only more unsociable if you're playing bloody Candy Crush or Peppa Pig at top volume Grin

Albadross · 29/10/2016 13:30

I spend every minute I can reading on my laptop. When DS asks me to play I always try to excuse myself. I don't know why, it makes me feel terrible not to want to play!

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 13:57

I still walk into the road Blush My friends at college kind of mother me… I had one friend, who has a toddler, grab me by the hood and bark "Stop!" Grin

Albadross · 29/10/2016 14:08

I'm getting stuck on the idea of being assessed but it feels scary because I'm almost hoping I do have ASD because nothing else makes sense. What types of questions do they ask in adult assessments?

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 14:43

Ah, my assessment.

They asked me if I had any collections as a kid, and I said no. I forgot about my ribbon collection, my book collections, my cigarette card collection, and my pound coin collection (I had a couple of particularly special 50p coins in there, and a five pound coin a nice shopkeeper gave me - I apologised for not having anything smaller than a £20 note when buying a bottle of pop, and he gave me my change with the £5 coin in it, saying he hadn't anything smaller, with a wink. I still have it! - but pound coins were my thing, really. I had dozens and dozens of pounds coins - there were several different series I was particularly keen on, and I was always thrilled by finding a better version of a design and date I already had).

And they asked me if I fidgeted or did any funny movements, or had odd habits. I said no, and later remembered this thing I do with my fingers when I'm stressed, and another set of things I do when I'm excited (including biting the sides of my hands - kind of at the base of my thumb - it's not a self-harm thing, but I don't know why I do it).

They gave me a questionnaire about sensory-seeking behaviours and sensory sensitivities, but it was very much aimed at parents of small children, and I couldn't get him to properly clarify whether he wanted me to answer it as I am now, or as I was when I was a child (I deal with the discomfort better now).

They asked about my friends, now and as a kid, the kind of things I like and liked to do, how I am in social situations, with facial expressions, or under stress. They asked about whether people seem to misunderstand me or if I have trouble understanding others, and they also asked DP questions about whether I seem to understand things, whether I repeat things, whether I go on and on about things, whether I ever seem to not hear him or not pay attention, etc.

They had my mum fill in a questionnaire about whether I had friends as a child, what I was like at playschool and toddler groups and around other small children (my mum has a dread horror of those things because she's even more spergy than I am, so she had to say she had no idea how I was with other children, as I wasn't around them much before school, and obviously she didn't see me at school), and how and with what I played. Questions about eating habits, when I was weaned and potty-trained, when I spoke words, when sentences, whether I had "appropriate" facial expressions (again, no idea - she doesn't really know what's "appropriate"!), etc.

They also asked questions about how I was at organising myself, remembering things, planning activities and getting things done, etc.

We spent a long time talking about my mental health history, emotions, stress reactions, etc., too.

Albadross · 29/10/2016 15:42

So did any of that count against ASD? I ask because my 'best friend' of 36 years said he'd always perceived me as super confident with lots of friends. He's a physics PhD who has never had a relationship and did very spergy things himself though...

DH is convinced he's never noticed anything either and keeps telling me I'm definitely not ASD. Would that make them rule it out?

PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 15:56

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autisticrat · 29/10/2016 15:58

My assessor wasn't sure about me, as I mask very well, have very high general intelligence (apparently) and compensate intellectually, and my case is complicated by comorbid bipolar disorder, so some the ASD aspects are overshadowed, but he consulted with the developmental psychiatrist, who diagnosed me. My report mentions severe executive functioning deficits, historical and current difficulties with interpersonal functioning, and sensory sensitivities.

DP and my parents didn't believe I had ASD but as I started considering going to the GP, DP wavered a little. They were all very supportive but tried to reassure me that they didn't think I was autistic. Gradually DP became more convinced, as he read more about it, and by the time of my assessment he had decided I probably had ASD. My parents took a little while after my diagnosis to understand it but now they're talking about neurotypicals (even though i never use that word!) and celebrating my sperginess with the best of them. And my mum now believes she's autistic too (well, duh, Mum Grin)

There's no individual thing that will make them rule it out, AFAIK.

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 16:05

Oh dear God, I sound smug as fuck. I only mentioned the intelligence thing because they mentioned it, IYSWIM. I basically hate it. They dragged ed psych in to evaluate me at school when I was a kid, to try and work out what to do with me. That, combined with the complete lack of social awareness or knowledge of how to behave diplomatically, made school pretty rough for me.

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 16:21

That was before mental illness and medications fucked with my brain, though. I did a very basic IQ test recently (Raven's matrices, for an ASD study) and have dropped down the centiles pretty dramatically.

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 16:49

Where have you all gone?

PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 16:54

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autisticrat · 29/10/2016 16:55

See, I told you I was socially inept - I've scared everyone off Grin

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 16:58

It's like my brain wants people to despise me 😂

PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 17:18

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autisticrat · 29/10/2016 17:24

Rats like scritches Grin Thank you.

Lego is great. I'm thinking of gate-crashing the local Lego club for spergy children. It doesn't actually explicitly say no over-30s. Sounds like an exhausting afternoon.

Albadross · 29/10/2016 17:27

That didn't sound smug at all - that's exactly the kind of thing I'd say and get told I was smug though!

I might get DP to read the checklist on the Samantha Craft blog - that really made me question everything.

Even I have started to see things I thought I did for another reason as possibly indicative of ASD. Like the fact that I used to 'play' at scripted radio shows and force my friends to do them in exact order of my preference. I never even thought about the fact that I only read non-fiction, or that I was bullied at school and had friends but found they never really 'got' me. My cognitive issues have really kicked in over the time since having DS too. I've been going religiously to the gym for 4 months and have not gained a single pound of muscle, I was told my muscles were wasted in my back and that's why I have chronic pain. My immune system is shocking too. If anyone so much as touched any of those bony bits that poke out of the sides of your vertebrae I jump because it's so sensitive, and I've had issues with sex for years with no obvious cause. Sorry if that's TMI.

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 17:34

Sensory-related sexual problems here, too. And - um - issues around bodily fluids, which I've had all my life - no sharing drinks cutlery, or ice cream even with close family, for example. Which is obviously quite limiting. Also probably TMI.

autisticrat · 29/10/2016 17:36

*drinks, comma, cutlery

PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 17:39

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PolterGoose · 29/10/2016 17:40

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