Tim Dowling, for example, is a twat

[Robespierre]

..who writes moderately entertaining columns about his personal life in The Guardian. Yesterday's was about the perils of self-googling, and in particular of an episode of self-googling which returned the text 'Tim Dowling for example is a twat'

Where did he find that humbling line?? On mumsnet of course!

In the article he claims to have given up self-googling, but we know that isn't true, don't we.

Shall we give him a few more personal insights? I think he is less of a twat than Jon Ronson and he doesn't have a whiney voice.

OMG Jeremy Vine is SO Twat.
I can't believe you said that stuffit!

Well I think Robert Peston is ok.

Btw - isn't "self-googling" redolent of onanism, even without the added dimension of being a practice undertaken to allay the ennui that dwells in the shadows between the shafts of writerly inspiration?

[In homage to the Friday night sex thread.]

So he is a shafted twat?

ok you can have jeremy

however I would like to claim natasha kaplinsky

Jeremy Vine is so not a twat. I really, really like him.

Natasha Kaplinsky is certainly a twat, I agree.

Peaches Geldolf is the biggest twat of all time.

She now has an - I kid not - agony column in the Evening Standard magazine. So much for it's new proprietor investing in good journalism. "Ooh, my dh has left me, I've lost my job, my mother's seriously ill. I know I'll write to Peaches, I'm the spoilt 21 year old daughter of a twatty rock star, for advice!"

Simon Cowell is a vain twat

Jordan/Katie Price is a cold, mercenary twat

Oh I like Simon Cowell, esp since he did that chat-with-child in the Guardian - his was one of the best, along with John Terry, amazingly.

Hmm - Sadly can't get into picturing Tim as a shafted twat. Probably just as well.

Back to Evan then.

Bet it's not just his nipple that's pierced.

[Valiant effort to drag thread further towards gutter.]

I'm watching him write next week's column.
It's not pretty

lol

You should leave home & stop worrying him so much you know

wiggle- Jeremy Vine so is twatanormous...

Ian Hislop- he used to be a twat.
he was quite funny last the other day though...

Simon Cowell = twat

Aw, does John Humphries have to be a twat? I thought he was alright but then probably I missed some twatishness?

Oh this is brilliant. But - I think Timmy's ok, even if he's not as funny as he used to be. My nominations would be:
Jay Rayner (utterly and totally)
Simon Cowell
Graham Norton (what has happened to him? Too much coke?)
Jon Ronson
And, I'm sorry to say, because I used to love him more than I can say, Louis Theroux will become one if he's not careful.

John Torode, for example, is a twat

The evidence:

1. gurning during Masterchef
2. utterly ridiculous 'I tried to be a veggie for a week and put on 4lbs' article in Saturyday's Grauniad. That would be because you ate mostly bread for a week you idiot when you clearly usually only eat meat & veg. Try cooking proper veggie food. Twat.

I haven't read the whole thread so assume that Jeremy Clarkson has been named and shamed?

MissM, if out google "biggest twat on television", his is indeed the name that comes up

If you google 'for example, is a twat' you get this thread. WOO HOO!

bitoffun.

TimDowling'sDog, you've reminded me of one of my favourite bits of Timmery:

'"Please feed the dog," I say to my eldest son, as part of my programme to get the dog to stop thinking of me as the go-to guy for food. "And give a bit of it to the cat."

"Why?" he says. I explain that the dog eats the cat's food all day, and that this redresses the balance slightly.

"That's so stupid," he says.

"It's not ideal," I say, "but it's the system. The cat expects it."'

I like Tim dowling,I don't think he is a twat.Russell Brand however,is.

think yourself lucky Tim

when i self google i get star trek

BellaNoir

Oh yes, John Torode for example IS a twat

And so is that other shouty twat, Greg, something-or- other.

They are entertaining twats, though

BTW, anyone wanting to crown Evan Davies with the tiara of twatdom will have to fight me. I heart him

Has anyone mentioned Ricky Gervais yet?

Massive twat, massive, huge.

Well, I think Tim Dowling is quite funny. He used to write in the Torygraph I think and I was a bit disappointed when he moved elsewhere (not enough to be bothered to change the newspaper delivery though!).

But Robespierre I remember your earlier name SixKindsOfCrisis and wondered when I saw it whether it was some kind of homage to that internet chat column!

And I have this vague feeling that a woman can't be a "twat". Like a man can't be a "bitch". But maybe that's just me...