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Super soaker etiquette at parties

407 replies

tigermoth · 17/07/2008 19:22

Does this sound ok to you?

My ds2 age 8 has been invited to a classmate's party tomorrow (after school ends, last day of term).

The party will take place outdoors in a small park next to the school. (Host and helpers will take the whole class to the park after school ends in the afternoon - hurrah!)

I saw the host's mother yesterday to confirm arrangements. Ds1 begged to bring his large super soaker water pistol with him - and a spare one to give to someone else.

Host's mother and I had a quick talk and agreed it was ok as long as it was warm weather. But I am not sure if host's mother was agreeing under duress IYSWIM. Ds2 was being very insistent and I wonder if the mother was just being polite through gritted teeth?

I told ds2 in front of host's mum that she had my absolute permission to veto any super soaker activity on the day.

ds2 has come home from school today obsessed with super soaker plans. He has apparently got his teacher's permission to bring in bottles of water and store them, along with his two super soakers, in school for use at the party (as there is no water supply at the park). I keep reminding him that if it is cool or if children get upset, the water fight is off, but he seems to have his mind set on this.

I cannot contact host's mother - can't get her phone number and I am unlikely to see her tomorrow morning as she does not do the school drop off. So as it stands,
ds2 will arrive at school tomorrow complete with super soakers.

I plan to write a letter to host's mother re-iterating that she has my utter permission to ban super soakers and ds2 knows this. I will give this letter to ds2 to give to her at the beginning of the party. Ds2 knows I will check that he has given her the letter when I collect him.

It's the end of term, the party is outdoors, I don't want to put the dampers on ds2's plans but hmmm.... what would you think if you were the host's mother? Would you be ok with this?

PS Bit of extra background - some of the parents of ds2's classmates see him as a bit of a livewire, so from what I can gather, he tends not to get too many play date or party invites. This is the first class party he has been invited to for ages and I have told ds2 it's really important that he does what he is told by the host mother so the other parents will see he takes notice. At school, ds2 is reasonably well behaved - I never have to see his teachers about his behaviour, and as a rule he plays well in a group, but I know he will be running around in a frenzy of super soaker, end of term excitement.....

OP posts:
nkf · 17/07/2008 21:00

No no and no again.

GentleOtter · 17/07/2008 21:00
Hulababy · 17/07/2008 21:01

But this is not a picnic in the park on a summer's day - it is a party where your child is a guest, one of many.

nd TBH, unless all cildren at the picnic had soakers then yes - you probably bug me. And I'd like to know in advance so that if my child was to join in I could have brought spare clothes, etc.

meglet · 17/07/2008 21:01

tigermoth if a child turned up unexpectedly with a super soaker at a picnic then it wouldn't bother me if the parent was staying to supervise.

it just isn't reasonable to expect the host of the girls party to control your DS with his super soaker.

CaptainUnderpants · 17/07/2008 21:01

Anything good on TV tonight ? Getting a bit bored

tigermoth · 17/07/2008 21:02

But super soakers are meant to be fun? Like a football or a frisbee. If I was having a picnic and a friend's child turned up with a super soaker, providing the day was warm and it was used responsibly I would be delighted!

OP posts:
themildmanneredjanitor · 17/07/2008 21:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NorthernLurker · 17/07/2008 21:03

20 children and 1 or even 2 toys is not fun. It is a disaster! Get a grip woman!

traceybath · 17/07/2008 21:03

I would think it was rude.

To be honest i'd have thought you were mad to let him have one at a school fair.

Its just asking for trouble.

Fine in your garden as numerous other people have said but not on in a park.

Also - other non-party attendees would get mightily pissed off if they got wet in the park.

onceinalifetime · 17/07/2008 21:03

'livewire' plus supersoaker = nightmare

parent minus discipline and manners = double nightmare

spicemonster · 17/07/2008 21:03

Yes if I were having a picnic in the park on a sunny day and one of the kids arrived with a super-soaker my heart would sink, I'd regret inviting him and I'd curse his mother. Sorry but you did ask

morningpaper · 17/07/2008 21:04

Yes it's rude

And it was rude at the school fair

And the people were laughing POLITELY but really they just wanted their children to concentrate on the coconut shy and get out of there as soon as possible and DRY

Hulababy · 17/07/2008 21:04

You aren;t getting it though - you may love it, but on here at least that is a minority view, especially at a party.

Super soakers can be fun yes - if everyone is involved, have a soaker each, have towels and clothes to change into, etc.

If you like the idea so much - hold a aparty yourself that does involve super soakers, just don;t impose it on other child's birthday treat.

pgwithnumber3 · 17/07/2008 21:04

Tigermoth either you are deluded or this is a huge joke.

Morloth · 17/07/2008 21:05

It is a wind up, no one is this dense.

On the off chance it isn't a wind up, I reiterate tigermoth, if you want to virtually ensure that your kid moves from "livewire" to "BRAT" in parent's minds then this is the way forward.

If I saw this happen at a friend's party NO CHANCE would your kid be getting invited to any I hosted.

ChippyMinton · 17/07/2008 21:06

Ah yes that well known toy the water squirting football/frisbee
Honestly I'd give up now Tigermoth, it is a terrible idea and you cannot justify it.

wulfstan · 17/07/2008 21:06

perhaps the host's mother didn't like saying no to someone else's son, as you seemed to be saying yes. Honestly, I can't see why you're going against the unanimous opinion here

nappyaddict · 17/07/2008 21:06

but all the children will be wet and they won't have anything to change into??

peanutbear · 17/07/2008 21:06

Would you really be delighted if there was 2 children with super soakers and 4 others without

IMHO children this age arent great at sharing things like that but all the other little boys will want a go with them

I think you think its a good idea so let him do it then there is only you who can make the decision

tigermoth · 17/07/2008 21:07

I am amazed at the anti super soaker feeling on here - but impressed my op has got so many answers. And in such a short time

OP posts:
morningpaper · 17/07/2008 21:08

and yes she was being polite, she was taken aback at your rude request

e.g.

GUEST: "Hello, thanks for this lovely dinner party! Do you mind if I urinate in your pot plant?"

Host: "Ermmm... no, go right ahead."

Doodle2U · 17/07/2008 21:08

Well I think it's a great idea. Yes, I vote YES - let him take the super soaker. He'll have a wonderful time and all the other children will squeal with delight and gambol around like fawns and gazelles, trying to avoid being squirted - jolly japes all round.

I think the letter idea was a stroke of genius too.

amidaiwish · 17/07/2008 21:08

are you thick?

sorry, but you must be

i have no more to say, but honestly, listen to what people are saying.

you have a "livewire" equals pain in the arse son who doesn't behave and doesn't get invited to anyones parties.

he's been invited to a party

he wants to bring a supersoaker and has somehow convinced his teacher to let him bring water

he goes to the party, soaks everyone (as if he is going to listen to the host) and ruins the party.

you are unreal. get a grip.

Morloth · 17/07/2008 21:08

Oh no, we love super soakers, we have 4 of the back pack ones, one for me, one for DH, one for DS and one for a guest to defend themselves with. The difference is we don't hijack other people's parties because we aren't rude.

ChippyMinton · 17/07/2008 21:09

a time and a place for supersoakers
this is neither

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