To not keep a flipping ‘gratitude journal’

[Eastie77Returns]

New manager at work, from the US if that’s relevant, declared a few weeks back that she thought it would a great idea for the team to start keeping a gratitude journal. Not my cup of tea at all but I was wasn’t bothered as it was optional. Then journals arrived at our home addresses in the post, she’d ordered them for everyone

On our weekly team meetings she started asking volunteers to read journal entries aloud. When no-one volunteered, she picked people. A few colleagues ‘read’ clearly made up on the spot entries. When it was my turn I just said I’m not keeping the journal. I’m grateful for many things but I don’t write them down. She didn’t look happy and I’ve heard I’m now on her shit list for not being a team player or something. WIBU??!

[SilverHairedCat]

Fuck that shit. It's up there with "reflective learning" journals for training courses. I don't give a shit if others find them useful, I hate hate hate hate hate them and gratitude journals can join them by getting in the sea.

Wankers.

In more practical terms, I'd be mentioning how dreadful this is to someone very senior and getting them to put an immediate stop to this utter nonsense.

[hangrylady]

That would be a no from me. She sounds so annoying

[Sunshineandcoffee]

Start quoting that primary school song

1. Autumn days when the grass is jewelled

See if the rest of you colleagues get the joke and see how much if the song you can get out before getting caught

[Caterinasballerinas]

Is there something you could use the book for that helps bring you some pleasure which can then be what you are grateful for and then can relay information about that when next asked to share? So if it was your meal planner pad you could be grateful for a dinner that the whole family enjoy, a healthy meal or being organised. I do think it’s wrong to be forced to do it and my thought is to somehow rebel in some way without 100% appearing to do so!

[Sunshineandcoffee]

Grr must preview before pressing send... sorry for typos

[Ihaventgottimeforthis]

Raindrops on roses
Whiskers on kittens

[dementedmummy]

Ok so this is a mind set thing (although i think she has gone about it all wrong and had the opposite effect!) you are supposed to write down 3 things you are grateful for every evening. It can be anything at all like "i was grateful i had the opportunity to wake up this morning" or "i was grateful the professionals are back in charge of my children's education now that lockdown has ended" or "i was grateful i got to go on y course because i really enjoyed it" or "i was grateful Katie brought in cream buns today as i was feeling hungry" Really anything at all big or small that you can be grateful for. The effect is supposed to be that you retrain your mind to focus on the positives rather than negatives in your life. This should in turn create a happier and more resilient you because although rubbish things may happen you are still finding the positives so it means you shouldn't sink into a funk if that makes sense. However, and its a big however, what you choose to be grateful for is entirely up to you and you should not be forced to share what you are grateful for. Its your life. Its your journey. If you want to share great but absolutely should not be force otherwise you have the situation you have here whereby you now resent your manager and she is turn seems to have a misplaced sense of where your team spirit is. Perhaps just thank her for the journal and for thinking of you but let her know you are not comfortable sharing what you are grateful for with the team as you are a private person. Good luck x
Ps if you can treat her exercises as a bit of fun or an excuse to be a little bit silly for a while, you might find you enjoy some of it. Wait until you have to write a letter to your future self!! Believe me, come back gratitude journal, all is forgiven! 😂

[Ihaventgottimeforthis]

Lots of chocolate for me to eat
Lots of coal making lots of heat

[YouWereGr8InLittleMenstruators]

Sunshine, you beat me to it! I'd try to smuggle in song lyrics, book titles, known verse and movies and wait to see what would happen.

[Eastie77Returns]

Thank you all…these replies have made me .

I work for a huge tech company. There has been a big focus on mental health and managers have apparently been told to prioritise anything that helps their teams well-being. This is her idea. Each weeks she reads her journal (it is always something cringe) and asks if anyone wants to share. Most people have their cameras off and no-one ever volunteers so she has now just started picking people. I will be on her shit list forever if I don’t have something this week so I’m printing this thread for inspiration

[SilverHairedCat]

"I'm grateful that my gratitude journal was eaten by the dog. Not having to complete it makes me relaxed and the memory of it being shredded gives me joy".

[Shellacbabe]

As someone who has had mental health struggles in the past 3 good things has been helpful for me but - and this is a massive but - it has to come at the right time in a cycle of mental health treatment. Every day? In front of colleagues? Fuck off!

Imagine something horrendous had happened in your personal life and you had to declare things you are grateful for publicly. It could make the trauma worse. It’s a big fat no from me.

[Redshoeblueshoe]

I'm loving the song lyrics suggestion.

[MadeInChorley]

@NinaDefoe

If you are chosen, you could read out pages of things you are grateful for. For added effect you could have a little cry as you read them out.

Here are a few to get you started:

I am thankful for having air to breathe.
I am thankful for having water to drink.
I am thankful for having food to eat.
I am thankful for the feeling of the sun on my skin.
I am thankful for the smell of flowers and fresh-cut grass.
I am thankful for the people in my life who care about me.
I am thankful that I will get to live today and hopefully tomorrow too.
I am thankful for my health even though it may not be perfect.
I am thankful for the money that I have.
I am thankful for the things that I own.
I am thankful that my parents gave me this life.
​I am thankful for the opportunities I have been given.
​I am thankful for the opportunity to learn from my mistakes.
​I am thankful to be able to think my own thoughts.
​I am thankful for my body, which carries me through this life.
​I am thankful that I can communicate and help others understand me.
​I am thankful to be able to learn new things.
​I am thankful to have a place to sleep at night.
​I am thankful for time because it allows me to experience life.
​I am thankful for the simple life.

Perfection. This must be set to music, OP, and you must sing it when next asked to contribute.

[BoredtoTiers]

We've been asked to fill in a weekly 'wellbeing survey' which it has been made clear is non-optional. Oddly enough (tech, very male workforce), the take up has been 'lower than expected'

I strongly believe people shouldn't be expected to share their feelings on anything very personal or controversial at work. An optional thing? Sure. A confidential support line or something? Great. But I no more want to share my mental health, my internal biases or my experiences of micro-aggressions on request than I want to be expected to share my politics or religious beliefs.

[EarringsandLipstick]

What if your entry was “the triple orgasm DH gave me last night”?

😂😂😂

[MostlyEatingBiscuits]

Cauliflowers fluffy and cabbages green.

Sure your colleagues can join in. Climax with broadbeans in their blankety bed.

[HeckinMiffed]

Love song lyric ideas. Try a line a day of a poem.....W H Auden Stop all the clocks would be fun!
Used to work in a call centre, we had a daily random word challenge.

[MorrisZapp]

I don't agree with random gratitude as a concept. It's up there with Be Kind. It's mainly women who are expected to perform gratitude, as a distraction from shitness.

I mean I enjoy a good coffee but if I buy it myself who am I feeling gratitude towards? Or am I meant to be offering my gratitude to a higher power I don't believe in?

[MostIneptThatEverStepped]

Oh god no, that's way too personal. And if you have to write it for others to hear you won't be able to be genuine. Well I wouldn't. But no, just no.

[Flubber88]

This sounds more like a religion than a job. This has nothing to to with a job role.

[ChaoticWoman]

I LOVE journalling and even I would be pissed off at this.

[NeverDropYourMooncup]

@NinaDefoe

If you are chosen, you could read out pages of things you are grateful for. For added effect you could have a little cry as you read them out.

Here are a few to get you started:

I am thankful for having air to breathe.
I am thankful for having water to drink.
I am thankful for having food to eat.
I am thankful for the feeling of the sun on my skin.
I am thankful for the smell of flowers and fresh-cut grass.
I am thankful for the people in my life who care about me.
I am thankful that I will get to live today and hopefully tomorrow too.
I am thankful for my health even though it may not be perfect.
I am thankful for the money that I have.
I am thankful for the things that I own.
I am thankful that my parents gave me this life.
​I am thankful for the opportunities I have been given.
​I am thankful for the opportunity to learn from my mistakes.
​I am thankful to be able to think my own thoughts.
​I am thankful for my body, which carries me through this life.
​I am thankful that I can communicate and help others understand me.
​I am thankful to be able to learn new things.
​I am thankful to have a place to sleep at night.
​I am thankful for time because it allows me to experience life.
​I am thankful for the simple life.

It's Evangelical Christianity by Stealth.

This is the sort of shit we had to sing about at primary school.



Mind you, that could give some more ideas that she might not notice are being given with less than full suspension of cynicism - you could say you are grateful for;


All things bright and beautiful.
All creatures great and small.
All things wise and wonderful.
Each little flower that opens.
Each little bird that sings.
All their glowing colours.
The birdies' tiny wings.
A green hill far away without a city wall.
England's mountains green.
The sun shining on clouded hills.
Those in peril on the sea.
Black ink and a white page.

Ebony and Ivory living together in perfect harmony, side by side on my piano keyboard.

That win or lose, sink or swim, one thing is certain, we'll never give in.
That side by side, hand in hand, we all stand together.

[SlashBeef]

Yanbu but you could have so much fun with this.
Write loads about reaching out and seizing the day and learning to dance in the rain. She'll love it.

[Poshjock]

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked….You're not as fat as you
imagine.
Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing everyday that scares you
Sing
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with
people who are reckless with yours.
Floss
Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes
you're behind…the race is long, and in the end, it's only with
yourself.
Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your
life…the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe
you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don't
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don't be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever
own..
Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
(Brother and sister together we'll make it through
Someday your spirit will take you and guide you there
I know you've been hurting, but I know I've been waiting to be there
for you. And I'll be there, just helping you out, whenever I can.
Everybody's free.)
Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for
good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize
that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will
look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than
it's worth.

Wear sunscreen.



Ah, maybe the wrong vibe, nevermind...

wanders off