I've just deliberately sent my husband on a wild goose chase

[GooseyGooseyWander]

I may or may not have changed some details of said hobby and equipment.

He has a 'hobby' that he is obsessed with. Let's call it wild goose chasing. He watches YouTube videos about wild goose chasing, he reads magazines about wild goose chasing, he has all the gear ('infrared', 'thermal imaging' etc) and likes to go out wild goose chasing on a regular basis.

Recently he hasn't been wild goose chasing due to some disillusionment with his level of success in wild goose chasing and the lack of presence of gooses in the local area. This means every night, for many hours he has talked to me about wild goose chasing. Reads out bits from magazines to me. Talks endlessly. Listens to goose chasing videos in bed and comments on goose chasing techniques.

Tonight I went out on a run and happened to see a wild goose in an unusual location.

Nonchalantly told DH about it and would you know it, off his own back he's excitedly gone out to chase said wild goose.

I've now had two hours of mumsnetting and watching MAFS UK without someone talking about gooses through it. I expect DH is still delightedly crawling around on his hands and knees with his thermal imaging goggles looking for said wild goose.

Only I didn't see a wild goose.

AIBU?

AIBU to see it again tomorrow?

Sounds like he's into dogging if you ask me!

Still recovering from this post 17 pages back:

“I saw something the other day about a woman who would put drops of water on the ground by the washing machine to entertain her husband when she needed some quiet time“

@HeartvsBrain

I also wonder what his hobby could be if it would be puting. I presume there are lots of fox watchers, quite a few moth hunters (and basically you just need to leave a window and a light on to attract them into your own home. You have said no to bats and badgers, but anyway they must be be quote plentiful too... Maybe it is searching for UFO, but I expect quite a lot of people do that, so, what have I gleaned already:

a They come out in the evening/nightime.

b. It isn't an embarrasing hobby like dogging or it would probably not be outing, I doubt he would tell friends or family about that hobby!

c It is possibly an area specific hobby, like warthog searching in the Forest of Dean, or Bison stalking in Kent. Something like that that could be outing because it covers a much smaller area, and people in the area may well know who is particularly interested in their wildlife.

d Maybe it really is Wild Goose hunting in somewhere like Slimbridge, or Abbottsbury (I know Abbottsbury is supposed to be known for it's Swans, but you sometimes see Swans and Geese, sorry Gooses near to Swans!

I suppose if you live in England OP, rather than Scotland for example, it could be Red Squirrels. The only place that I know in England that definitely has Red Squirrels is Brownsea Island, in Poole Harbour. I don't know if anyone actually lives there, if they do they are probanly Caretakers of the Island, which would make it very oiting for the OP. However,
i) I don't think Squirrels tend to come out much at night, and
ii) They are not difficult to see during the day,
so that was probably a waste of my time, and anyone elses if they have read my (boring) muses 😄

Actually I think that the pp who think that OP was being mean to her DH, should think that I am being much meaner to the OP in trying to work out what hobby she is talking about, when she has said she doesn't want to tell us as it would be too outing. So I will give up OP, but thanks for a brilliant thread 💐

Good post.

Oh, OP - this is the best ever thread I've read. You should write for a living - we would all buy the book!!!

And yes, as the post above me - still crying at the woman who put the water drops on the floor.

I want the 88% of you who voted YANBU to be my friends - this is the kind of thing I love - maybe I'm a meanie, or maybe I have a DH with 2 of the most annoying hobbies on MN (cycling AND golf)

I also think Plan might be "goading" us all with her comments.

Please be my friend 😂

@HeartvsBrain

For all the pp who are having a go at OP, when I was doing my nursing training (many years ago now) we had members of the Fire brigade come and speak to us, one of the things that particularly stood out for me was that they said that after every tragic case they need to use humour to help them cope. They were not hard hearted horrible people, they just had to use what would help them get through some very tough situations. Now I don't suppose that the OP is going through anything that terrible - well at least I hope she isn't - but she has just given what most of us consider to be a little bit of humour connected to her daily life. We have no idea what else might be going on for her, but she may really have needed that quiet bit of time away from her DH, in fact after the last year and a half, I think we all need a bit of peace and relaxation to try to recharge our batteries. The OP has tried pointing out to her DH that she is not that interested in his hobby, but he ignores her and goes on and on and on about his particular interest. He also plays you tubes about it when she is trying to sleep, but instead of burying him under the patio (joke) she told him a lie - one that wouldn't cause him any harm physically, in fact could do him some good as it got him outside, into presumably freshish air, and taking some exercise, and one that should help him mentally as it has revived his interest in his hobby, and given him hope, and in my mind we could all do with some hope at the moment. I don't ordinarily agree with people lying to someone, unless it is a genuine white lie, but what if the OP has become so depressed by her husband's constant (I doubt it is constant, but it probably feels like it) harping on about his hobby, and she desperately needed a break from it? Would it have been kinder for her to tell him that if he didn't shut-up about it, and if he didn't infact go into another room for at least an hour or two to give her some peace, then their marriage might start to come under serious jeopardy? Do you think her husband would have been happier knowing that he was boring his DW to tears, or happier being told a little lie, that got him outside and enjoying himself? If I was the 'wounded' party, I would far rather be teased with the latter choice - it actually sounds a quite loving choice to me - than told how boring I was! Yes, the OP didn't need to come and tell us, but we are strangers, we are not thinking that her DH is an arsehole, many of us do have some empathy with the OP because we suffer a somewhat similar fate with our Dlovedones, but what the OP is actually doing (hopefully) is getting something off her chest, and having a laugh with people, as I said before, who do not know her husband, so he can't suffer from us knowing about her little game, and actually giving many of us some much needed light relief. A while ago I was very ashamed to have said something so horrible on Mumsnet that I was temporarily stopped from posting. So please those of you who had a go at the OP, save your comments for people who really deserve them, like I did, and maybe like me (I decided I will not go onto any threads that I know are about my trigger - my trigger is personal to me, I have no right to try and change other peoples thoughts on the subject, especially as it can be extremely upsetting to them) - come straight out again from any threads that cause you distress. Sorry OP for bringing a bit of a dampner to your thread, I know that you can easily ignore the naysayers here as they are just being silly, but I really want them, for their sakes, to really lighten up a bit! And another apology if it seemed like I was suggesting your marriage might be in dire straights, I was just trying to give an example, a 'what if' scenario. Thanks again for the laughs OP.

👏

I wish my OH had a hobby, he just sits in the chair, farting, watching football and annoying me!

I’ve been in tears today
Oh op ,you made me laugh out loud …you have cheered me up so much

Deer spotting

My husband is a (very lovely) golf bore. He loves to come home and tell me exactly how (and with which club) he scored a birdie on the very tricky 7th hole.

I fought fire with fire, and took up golf myself.
Now we can bore in stereo

OP this is inspired! Absolutely amazing

Brilliant, can't stop laughing, wish my hubby had a hobby I could sendout chasing for a couple of hours, well done,

Be very careful.
Next time you say you’ve seen one and he goes wild goosing he will happen across not one but 2 wild gooses.
In his excitement and as a token of love for telling him about your wild goose sighting he will bring them both home to demonstrate his excellence as a wild gooser
Now as they are wild gooses and not house gooses they will promptly crap all over your lovely cream shag pile carpet.
At which point enter your hungry hounds who love a bit of wild gooses.
Cue blood, guts, crap and feathers everywhere. Your serene living room will look like a scene from a slasher movie….

My guess - he’s a hedgehog fancier
Or believes theres a black panther stalking the lanes 😹

Babe read the thread but my money is on him being a twitcher.

It's golf!!!! It has to be golf!! You found a new driving range...

DH has fish & installed a bird table. DS & I practice various interested faces, noises and nods.

Then I drink gin.

Evil genius

This has made me laugh so much, simple but genius. Oh, and my fave word of the week is goose

Goose! Stupid auto correct!

@Wherearemymarbles

Be very careful. Next time you say you’ve seen one and he goes wild goosing he will happen across not one but 2 wild gooses. In his excitement and as a token of love for telling him about your wild goose sighting he will bring them both home to demonstrate his excellence as a wild gooser Now as they are wild gooses and not house gooses they will promptly crap all over your lovely cream shag pile carpet. At which point enter your hungry hounds who love a bit of wild gooses. Cue blood, guts, crap and feathers everywhere. Your serene living room will look like a scene from a slasher movie….

My guess - he’s a hedgehog fancier
Or believes theres a black panther stalking the lanes 😹

Oooh.

You are wrong about the cream shag pile. It's a funny grey colour and pretty scratchy because it's herdwick.

Sigh. He's not going out goose chasing tonight. Currently complaining that he has watched every single YouTube video available of goose chasing and someone needs to make some new ones.

I'd love to tell you that my next move was to suggest he makes his own, and I did consider it, I really did but then I realised that would probably mean watching them. So no.

Typing this and simultaneously nodding along to him wittering about geese has meant I've already missed the first 5 mins of MAFS tonight.

Rtft in instalments throughout the day today. Just. So. Ridiculously. Funny! OPs hilariously written posts and the righteous indignation of a few I am now desperate to know the hobby! My guess is otters!

Aggghhh gooses! My fave word is gooses!

I must admit I have a rather boring hobby (train spotting) although I try not to bore people silly with it. Pretty sure it's not that though (someone mentioned it upthread) trains are noisy buggers, so kids wouldn't scare them. OP is a bloody evil genius though, especially if it meant he had to put the kids to bed after letting them stay up late.

Dogging