What's the most PFB embarrassing moment you've had?

[Giantwaterbottle]

I remember mine and physically cringe. DS1 is very bright, learned to walk and talk early and had a good vocabulary. So bright and developmentally at the top end (younger DS slower on all counts but both totally normal) but not exceptional.

Being shown round a lovely nursery and I said on more than one occasion how he was "really very smart" and that the doctor had said how clever he was (local GP had said she's very good speech wise and health visitor had said similar.

I cringe so hard every time I think about it. He goes to that nursery and whenever I see the head who showed us around I just think about how much of a wanker I must have seemed 😭😫😆

Seeing the onion soup post reminded me of the time I wrote a Strongly Worded Letter to Ella's Kitchen chastising them for using salt in their breadsticks. They wrote me a very nice letter back explaining that it wasn't very much salt and it was a traditional recipe etc. I was very sniffy about it and made breadsticks from scratch for my PFB, keeping the dough in the freezer so I could whip up batches on demand.

Poor second-born DD had supermarket breadsticks.

I saw one on here that was quite sad actually. This poor women was pregnant and was so worried about the baby's movements she would record every single movement (time and description) throughout the day. She would then compare the chart and call her midwife if the baby hadn't made exactly the same movements as the day before, eg, big kick on the left at 9pm, roll at 9.10pm, little kicks at 9.15pm. A few posters tried to explain that you are looking for more of a general pattern, not literally the exact same movements down to the minute but she wouldn't have it. She also felt panicked every morning because she hadn't been able to monitor the movement while she had been sleeping. I hope she's OK now.

This thread is brilliant! I can't recall anything overly precious, but I do remember googling what baby nipples looked like cos I thought DD's looked so weird, just like tiny little pinpricks, and I was worried she would have no nipples . And then worrying I was on some sort of list for searching for 'baby nipples' online.

I was vindicated when my best friend came to visit and I was dressing DD and she said 'Is that what baby nipples look like?!' and I was like 'YES, I KNEW THEY LOOK ODD'. Or maybe it's just the two of us.

Oh and at Christmas, we have a Santa parade thing that goes round all the neighbourhood. Bearing in mind DD wasn't even one for her first Christmas, but we stood outside waiting for Santa and then I burst into tears when they turned into our street because it felt so magical and we were such a lovely perfect family. Luckily DH suggested I go and wipe my nose inside before Santa disembarked and was greeted by me snottily waving a disinterested small child at him.

@Viques While you were thinking my PFB at 11lb was a podge of gloop (it was) I was worrying your PFB at a normal weight wouldn't last the night. And groan did ask some mothers of average weight babies if their babies were well.

Two that really stand out are mentioning to the health visitor that his little toes looked too round - obviously because he was only weeks old and had never walked on them! The other was making an appointment with the HV when he was about 3 years old because I thought he was coloured blind- what could they have done 🙄🤣

When we left hospital with DD, my DH drove home at 15mph. I remember sitting in the back beside DD and asking if the traffic was bad. "I'm being CAREFUL" he replied. I apologise to all the other road users trying to use the main A65 route out of Leeds that day

@MamaRaisingBoys

I still cringe whenever my family brings this up (frequently)

When PFB was 6 months old he toppled backwards from sitting and hit his head on the caravan floor. I got down on the floor and hit my own head trying to replicate the sound so I could guess how hard he might have hit it and decide if I needed to take him somewhere to get checked out 🥴 I don’t know what I was thinking! 😂

Cannot stop laughing...

I didn't wear any perfume. I remember entering my livingroom when my mil was visiting and I could strongly smell perfume. I remember telling her, her perfume was too strong and she promised not to wear so much, poss any again when she visited.

Took mine to a baby group where at the beginning of said group we all laid our babies on the floor, waved a parachute rainbow blanket thing over them whilst singing you are my sunshine, it was my first time at the group and as I was singing along, I could feel tears pricking my eyes and that lump in my throat start to form, I started sobbing, the poor lady next to mr look a little startled and kindly asked if I was ok l, my response - verbatim “yes, it’s just you know, he really is my sunshine”. I even had the audacity to go back the week after. What an utter tosser I was.

I laughed so much I cried.

@firstimemamma

I was determined to establish breastfeeding and read somewhere that it's a good idea to log feeds. I took this to the extreme and for about 6 weeks I kept a note of literally every single feed (EBF) he had - even if he was cluster feeding and having 20 feeds a day. Every feed was logged down to the exact minute e.g left boob 3:19-3:37pm. The breastfeeding counsellor at my local support group thought I was mental and told me I didn't need to do it but I didn't listen. I think around the 6-8 week mark it gradually stopped.

oh god i did this too!!! I found my notebook recently and cringed for days!!! Mine was exactly the same - which boob it was, start and finish time, whether or not there was any sick up afterwards . DD is now 15 and found it all hilarious.

That comment suggesting that parents were much more laid back years ago made me laugh. I was a 90s baby and my mum wouldn’t let me see a TV (never mind watch it) or eat sugar until I was 5 according to my aunt. My younger brother was raised by wolves in comparison.

RAN my DD to the gp convinced she was blind because she didn't look at me.
The receptionist gently pointed out that she was now looking at me and had looked at her several times as well.
The gp was less gentle and smirked that it's normal to fret over 'every silly little thing as a new mum'

As a non-Mum I find these beautiful. I don't think I could ever have coped with having a baby. I would SO have been the one banging my head on the floor to reproduce the sound...

@Dutchesss

Took mine to a baby group where at the beginning of said group we all laid our babies on the floor, waved a parachute rainbow blanket thing over them whilst singing you are my sunshine, it was my first time at the group and as I was singing along, I could feel tears pricking my eyes and that lump in my throat start to form, I started sobbing, the poor lady next to mr look a little startled and kindly asked if I was ok l, my response - verbatim “yes, it’s just you know, he really is my sunshine”. I even had the audacity to go back the week after. What an utter tosser I was.

I laughed so much I cried.

This would also worry me: how would I know I'd picked up the right baby afterwards, & not gone home with somebody else's? I mean, whenever I go to pick up a cat at the cattery, I always think somebody else's is mine, before I get to the enclosure that's actually got my cat of 15 or so years in it.

My pfb had a bit of a cry our second night in hospital. He was taken off to the little nursery so he wouldn't disturb other mums, and I sat in there with him all night just gazing at him 😍

Not me but I visited my lovely friend the week she delivered her PFB and she and her DH gushed about how they believed he was "advanced" because he seemed quite alert and "was obviously annoyed at the other newborns crying on the ward." He was less than 4 days old. Bless.

I am due later this year and no doubt will be as bad . I've already been called out by DM for stating that I read batches of 6 toys rotated weekly is best for child development

@Tataru that's brilliant! I took 4 month old ds to meet Santa at the library. I've still got the photo and he just looks so confused and clearly had no idea what the hell was going on!

Mine's more odd than funny. It was spring and I was looking at clothes for my newborn pfb. I picked up a lovely shorts and t-shirt outfit, in age 6-9mths and thought, "But it'll be nearly winter by then, why are they selling shorts for the winter, they'd be way too cold..." Like mine was the only baby in the whole world!

Doting grandparent one I have remembered about my late Mum.

When my nephew was potty training aged about 2, my Mum - who minded nephew several days every week - used to put him on the potty in front of the TV after tea. This was in the days of yore when Emmerdale was on at teatime, so he got to sit in front of it quite regularly.

I was visiting one day and she said to me, "Do you know, I'm sure he can read - whenever the music and titles for Emmerdale come on, he says 'Emmerdale.'"

I observed this in action later the same day, when - as the music started - Mum said "Emmerdale, Chris!" and Chris duly repeated "Emdale!"

Chris, bless him, is now 41 and a lovely man, though not the sharpest tool in the shed...

Lots of people logging every move. Can't help but wonder if they are in teaching.

Having said that I wouldn't read bad or violent news articles whilst breast feeding in case the tone filtered down into my milk

@TheRealMrsJelly

Mine's more odd than funny. It was spring and I was looking at clothes for my newborn pfb. I picked up a lovely shorts and t-shirt outfit, in age 6-9mths and thought, "But it'll be nearly winter by then, why are they selling shorts for the winter, they'd be way too cold..." Like mine was the only baby in the whole world!

Hahaha! That made me giggle!

I remember thinking that my baby had to exercise to build up his muscle tone or he wouldn't be able to walk... I would gently move his legs in a cycling motion 10x at every nappy change from about 6 weeks

@Slumcat

Took mine to a baby group where at the beginning of said group we all laid our babies on the floor, waved a parachute rainbow blanket thing over them whilst singing you are my sunshine, it was my first time at the group and as I was singing along, I could feel tears pricking my eyes and that lump in my throat start to form, I started sobbing, the poor lady next to mr look a little startled and kindly asked if I was ok l, my response - verbatim “yes, it’s just you know, he really is my sunshine”. I even had the audacity to go back the week after. What an utter tosser I was.

I did that to to that song, kept the tears in til i got home though but he was my sunshine and he was baby two!

It's not tosserish, just an illustration of immense love and protection, it took me a long time to be able to sing that song without crying!

I think what all these posts show is what an absolute upheaval parenthoood is and how much we want to get it right. It also shows how so many of us struggled and yet couldn't say in real life and only recognise years later.

I thought I never did any pfb stuff but reading these and remembering has come flooding back! It's been fun to read and some are very funny

When DD was 2 weeks old, it was Christmas Day, DP and I had a little cry at the thought of her leaving home (....in 18 or so years....!)