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Something unexpected that made you go "wtf??"

709 replies

FuckingFabulous · 25/05/2021 18:14

I want to hear examples from your experiences. Like when someone drops the facade for a second and you see something a bit scary about them, or when someone reasonable comes out with something utterly ludicrous and you've no idea how to react. I want to hear them! Because earlier today, I found out that my neighbours daughter doesn't have identical twins called Ronnie and Jensen, which was my assumption. She has one boy called Jensen, but my neighbour hates the name and will only call him Ronnie. The boy is six. His middle name isn't even Ronnie. His grandma just prefers that name and calls him that. Confused

OP posts:
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6
ImTakingTheEssence · 30/05/2021 21:44

I once found a pigeon caught in some fishing wire, I tried to free it but it started to fly away. I still had a hold of the wire at the time so I just looked like some nutter flying a pigeon around in the air like a kite

crayray · 30/05/2021 21:55

Name changed for this as its quite outing (though I hate that word!).

I was once in Nairobi on a bus trying to get to an event. We got stuck in completely gridlocked traffic at a junction. Frustrated drivers didn't wait in traffic lanes and just queued up side by side until eventually both sides of the multi lane road were blocked with drivers trying to head in the same direction. There was one police officer trying to resolve the situation, and hundreds of cars. Eventually a group of local taxi drivers took it upon themselves to deal with it and started easing the blockage by directing one car at a time. One poor schmuck moved forward a bit without their express permission, and they immediately started shouting at him to reverse, but there was nowhere for him to go because the person behind him had pulled forward. At one point they had his car door open and were shouting and I thought they were going to drag him out. Fortunately they came up with a more pragmatic solution - they lifted his car with him in it, and moved it, leaving him several feet away facing the wrong direction entirely....

WeegieWan · 30/05/2021 23:57

@Eggsley - No, in a town in Scotland beginning with G - clearly there ARE two of them! Shock Shock

CeeceeBloomingdale · 31/05/2021 06:12

@Twenty2

Havering, we say 'clapping' for petting a dog etc in NE England, too.
I've never heard this! Have lived in the NE all my life. I love colloquialisms.
Pals812 · 31/05/2021 08:56

@Lazydaz, she asked if it was my dog although she knew I didn't have a dog as I lived in a flat. She'd also seen the guy approach us.
She is quite out there and a lot of moments with her are wth to be honest!

Bearsinmotion · 31/05/2021 09:40

I used to commute daily through Clapham Junction. I used a wheelchair but could manage steps, but relief on other commuters to carry the chair up and down the stairs. It was such a regular thing it was often the same people, but we rarely spoke, people would look at me, I would smile and nod and by the time I got to the top the chair was ready and waiting. It was a great system 😁

One day I was on my way home from work, the height of the evening rush hour. A young man had brought the chair down the steps and I was making my way out when I was violently shoved to the side and a man’s voice said loudly, “See how you like it!”

Wheelchairs don’t move sideways so I was nearly tipped out. Then I heard the man who had carried the wheelchair chair say, “What the hell do you think you are doing?” Next thing I know, shover man is running up the stairs to the next platform, young man plus friends in hot pursuit. Other commuters stopped to make sure I was ok.

A few minutes later the young man came back to check on me and to let me know that station security had the man and were talking to him. I went home.

Still puzzles me! WTF did he think I had done, who the hell shoves a woman in a wheelchair, and in front of so many people?!

Actually I have probably created quite a few WTF moments in my time!

CookieClub · 31/05/2021 09:51

@Bertiebiscuit

Found out that 2 of my acquaintances are anti vaxxers - I'm horrified - may have to rethink who I mix with
Likewise they might want a friend who is able to be open-minded too...?
Brackenandbramble · 31/05/2021 09:52

@ImTakingTheEssence

I once found a pigeon caught in some fishing wire, I tried to free it but it started to fly away. I still had a hold of the wire at the time so I just looked like some nutter flying a pigeon around in the air like a kite
Poor pigeon but the mental image you flying your pigeon, hilarious 😆
Brackenandbramble · 31/05/2021 10:02

Years ago a guy was high as a kite off his face on something and made his way to a roof of a two storey building. He was shouting and throwing stuff down. The police were there, the next thing he jumps off land on a parked car and tries to run off! Thevpolice have to wrestle him to the ground. It was like something from a film. I'm sure he must have been hurt from the face but didn't feel it at the time

Brackenandbramble · 31/05/2021 10:02

Fall not face

peaceanddove · 31/05/2021 12:41

@runoutofgoodusernames

I worked in a Steiner School. Bonkers and Just general wtf? Every. Single. Day. 🤦‍♀️
I was educated at a Steiner school. I agree it was bonkers, but it was the very best kind of bonkers. I absolutely loved every minute of being at school 😊😊😊
Alcemeg · 31/05/2021 14:47

My great-aunt was queuing at the Post Office for her pension, nattering with the others waiting in line. The police came in and started asking them all what they could remember. What they could remember of what? - everyone wanted to know.

Turns out they had all just witnessed an armed robbery by men in drag. Only everyone had been too busy gossiping to notice!

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 31/05/2021 14:58

@Alcemeg
🤣
reminds me of the joke about the family that got robbed but never noticed because they were slurping their soup too loudly in another room

highheeledhattie · 31/05/2021 17:52

Got chatting to a woman at a bus stop, who told me her daughter in Australia had given birth to her first child that morning. After congratulating her on her Grandchild she said 'Thank you, but as they are 12 hours behind us the baby hasn't actually been born yet." She was perfectly serious.

FuckingFabulous · 31/05/2021 18:53

@highheeledhattie

Got chatting to a woman at a bus stop, who told me her daughter in Australia had given birth to her first child that morning. After congratulating her on her Grandchild she said 'Thank you, but as they are 12 hours behind us the baby hasn't actually been born yet." She was perfectly serious.
Oh my. That's like the American people who were outraged that the U.K. didn't tell them 9/11 was coming as we obviously knew hours in advance.
OP posts:
theDudesmummy · 31/05/2021 19:00

Australia is 12 hours AHEAD of us anyway!

Allmyarseandpeggymartin · 31/05/2021 22:29

My lovely Irish mil had a brother in a home in Ireland, one day the home rang and said he was poorly.
MIL dutifully took herself off to BHS and bought a fine black suit and hat “ to “look nice at the funeral” - I was like WTF! He’s not even dead yet!

She and her other brother and the wives bundled themselves into their Sierra sapphire, booked the ferry and went home to “sort the arrangements” - she was most perturbed when he lived!!

Infact he outlived MIL - wonder what became of the famous BHS trouser suit?

HeechulOppa · 01/06/2021 01:35

My first WTF moment was a strangely magical one. Was in honeymoon in Paris and walking past the Louvre very late one night. There was a tiny young woman, maybe 20 or so, very petite and beautiful, belting out a full aria as she walked. It wasn’t just that she was a good singer, she sounded properly operatically trained with the most spine-tingling voice. But it was the way she was walking so casually (she may have been a bit drunk) like she was just going about her night, not looking for fuss. At one point she stopped to tie up her shoelaces and she didn’t break note and just carried on her way. It was just so casual, and this amazing voice. She looked like she could have been Christine Daae.

A few days later we were in Rome and in the evening we went into a church outside the Colloseum and there was a full on, very extravagant wedding going on, very beautiful and very special. We tried to make ourselves unobtrusive (the church was still open to visitors and we were allowed to be there), and when the wedding came to an end and the new couple came close to us we congratulated them. Afterwards one of the church stewards came to us and told us we did the right thing in congratulating them as the bride was the daughter of a mob boss. Never knew if they were teasing us gullible tourists but given the scale of things I wouldn’t rule it out.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 01/06/2021 11:50

@OldieButaGoodie

Daughter and I went to Thailand on a holiday. Got a taxi at the airport, knowing it was at least an hour trip to our hotel, but it was only mid-morning, so not a problem.

However, on the way the driver had to 1. drop some money off to his son 2. stop to get some fuel for the car 3. stop to get some food for himself 4. stop to get some coffee, as he hoped some caffeine would wake him up!

An hour into our trip - and google telling me we were only half-way there - I noticed his eyes starting to droop and thought "surely he's not falling asleep??" - he was - so I told him to pull over and get in the passenger seat so I could drive. AND HE DID! Grin

Even tho I had never been to Thailand before, my daughter used Google to direct me and before we got to our hotel, he woke up and said he was good to go again!

I hope you split the fare with him as you did half the driving. And gave yourself a tip.
Eastie77 · 01/06/2021 13:31

When my brother died a few years ago I received an e-mail from a friend of my then boyfriend. I didn't know her particularly well as we'd only met a few times.

The first line of her message read "Sorry about your brother, how did he die exactly?" She then went on to remind me her family ran a florist and proceeded to list various flower arrangements and prices so that I could pass them on to mourners who wanted to buy flowers for the funeral.

Boyfriend tried to defend her as someone "who is just very practical about things". I blocked her immediately.

Orgasmagorical · 01/06/2021 14:42

OMG, Eastie Shock. I'm sorry about your brother Flowers

SchadenfreudePersonified · 01/06/2021 22:07

@CustardySergeant

"once I left my pushchair on the pavement; strapped kids in car, walked on the road side of the car, got in and walked off."

You got in the car and walked off? Had you bought Fred Flintstones old car?

Here - that's a classic motor, that is! Grin
ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 02/06/2021 09:32

one Sunday evening I saw a WhatsApp message in my son's class group chat from one of the mums.

it read: "Do you want to fuck or not?"

she meant to text her husband 🤣🤣🤣

LuvMyBubbles · 02/06/2021 12:43

@highheeledhattie

Got chatting to a woman at a bus stop, who told me her daughter in Australia had given birth to her first child that morning. After congratulating her on her Grandchild she said 'Thank you, but as they are 12 hours behind us the baby hasn't actually been born yet." She was perfectly serious.
My mil said the same thing, had to his birth readings and signs it some crap she used to go on with because of the time difference. And said the same thing about different birth dates. Ffs 🤦‍♀️
Ameanstreakamilewide · 02/06/2021 13:12

@Confusedandshaken

We come from a Catholic family and like a lot of Catholics we pick and choose what parts of the religion to follow. So yes to mass on Sundays, holy communion and a church wedding but also YES to a woman's right to choose, supporting gay marriage and using contraception.

One family friend was very, very traditional and devout and so we were always careful what we said around her and particularly so when any of her three sisters were around because all three of them were nuns and we didn't want to offend them. One day, not long after our wedding, at a big gathering at her house someone asked DH and I would we be having a baby soon. I hesitated before answering and one of the nuns spoke up saying 'Jesus! No way! It's much too soon for that sort of carry on. Youngsters are much better organised nowadays'.

It was so incongruous coming from an elderly lady in a nuns habit and headdress but I was so grateful to her for saying it. The friend and her sisters are all dead now and I miss them.

I remember reading an interview with Sister Wendy (it could have been Desert Island Discs, actually) and she said she was working on an art program and one of the producers was a woman in her 20s/30s.

Sr Wendy said the producer (Sarah Jane) was wearing make up, a lovely skirt and heels; and Sarah Jane said that she hoped she wasn't offending Sr Wendy being dressed as she was.

And Sr Wendy was delighted to see someone young and just enjoying life.
She said just because 'I don't wear lipstick and high heels, it doesn't mean that anyone else shouldn't'.

I was so surprised to hear that that was her attitude and it made me love her just a little bit more, god love her.