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AIBU to let my children chalk on the road? Neighbour washed it all away.

999 replies

TakesTheCake · 28/03/2021 19:10

We have lived on a small square for four years, where the neighbours are pretty unfriendly and insular (unlike our old street, where they were all lovely and welcoming and mutual support abounded :-( ), and two doors away lives a couple who have always been reasonably friendly and cordial.

Today my two boys aged 7 and 12 were outside playing for a few hours on the square with the boy from next door - riding scooters, running, swinging on the swing in the little grassed area, with me and the boy’s dad keeping watch. My elder boy ran in to get the chalks they sometimes use to draw on our driveway but this time they all drew on the road (there is no pavement, just driveways and road). It covered outside our house and also the neighbours’ house (the couple we are somewhat friendly with). They were really proud of their creativity, finished up, then came in for lunch. Five minutes later the neighbour came out of her house, ran the hose on her driveway and worked pretty hard at scrubbing/washing it all away.

The kids were dismayed when they saw her doing it, and thought they had done something wrong. It felt really horrible for me too, as I don’t think kids’ chalk drawings are out of order in any way, and will wash away in the next rain. They have never caused any issues in the road, so it can’t be because of built-up resentments that spilled over, and they have literally never drawn on the road in the whole four years we have lived there.

She saw me see her doing it, and it feels really awkward now. I would rather she had come over and just straightforwardly said it bothers her to see it from her window and could I make sure it isn’t outside her house again. Washing it away felt passive aggressive, or she really feels I let them do something out of order and wrong.

AIBU to have let them? Are children’s chalk drawings on the road (NOT her driveway or even close) not OK?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
theleafandnotthetree · 31/03/2021 08:49

@SleepingStandingUp

Everybody searching for an art hero, people need someone to look up to, I never found anyone who fulfill my needs because the neighbours always washed it away, a lonely place to be. And so I learned to depend on me and draw in a book.

Because the greatest love of a is happening to me - chalking. I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me - self expression through the medium of art. The greatest love of all is easy to achieve if the neighbours back off. Learning to love your neighbours though is the greatest love of all

🤣🤣🤣
tangerinelollipop · 31/03/2021 08:51

The neighbour was wrong to do it immediately

Even this is debatable. Perhaps it's the only time the neighbour could do it? Perhaps she was busy in the evening/the next day?

LoisWilkersonslastnerve · 31/03/2021 08:58

I think kids outside with chalk is brilliant and harmless fun. Some people need to lighten up.

LoisWilkersonslastnerve · 31/03/2021 09:00

Lots of frequent heavy rain where I live mind you. It would be washed away within minutes here, the kids would be washed away too.Grin

IamMaz · 31/03/2021 09:02

I wouldn't like it - even though it's on the road. I'd be praying for rain!!! LOL

JosephineBaker · 31/03/2021 09:09

Your NDN are weird. “Shocked,” ffs - it’s drawing in chalk in the road, not dealing crack.

Ignore the miserable gits. Your boys and their friend were doing nothing wrong.

jessstan2 · 31/03/2021 09:09

@IamMaz

I wouldn't like it - even though it's on the road. I'd be praying for rain!!! LOL
It was only during lockdown so we can surely make allowances. If it was 'normal practice' that would be difference.
jessstan2 · 31/03/2021 09:09

I meant 'different' not 'difference'.

fizbosshoes · 31/03/2021 09:14

Havent RTFT but unless there were offensive words or images or they were about to have photos fir selling their house (I have read OPs posts, and have concluded neither was the case) I cant see why it's a problem?
I've seen lots of chalk drawings and messages on the pavement near us and I've never seen anyone wash it away.the pavement seems to have survived ok.

RogueMNerKnowsNoShame · 31/03/2021 09:14

For the love of Holy chalk, @mnhq, please could this thread (or perhaps just 2 or 3 of the posters on it) go into classics to chalk for eternity?

Butwasitherdriveway · 31/03/2021 09:24

@RogueMNerKnowsNoShame

For the love of Holy chalk, *@mnhq*, please could this thread (or perhaps just 2 or 3 of the posters on it) go into classics to chalk for eternity?
You want to send us away 😪
Butwasitherdriveway · 31/03/2021 09:25

@tangerinelollipop

The neighbour was wrong to do it immediately

Even this is debatable. Perhaps it's the only time the neighbour could do it? Perhaps she was busy in the evening/the next day?

So busy for 18 hours she couldn't chuck a bit of water over chalk? Doing what?
SleepingStandingUp · 31/03/2021 09:25

It was only during lockdown so we can surely make allowances. If it was 'normal practice' that would be difference. Would you really be so offended if this had happened in the Summer of 2019 in those halycon days of freedom and liberty where not only could you chalk on the pavement , but could pop to the shops to buy more and invite Granny over to admire it? When Bats were just cute little flying creatures who adorned the Halloween cards you made for the neighbours rather than the source of THE GREAT RECKONING? surely all those scamp's in Don't Tell The Midwife didn't wait for a pandemic to liberate the arts onto the streets of the masses?

Butwasitherdriveway · 31/03/2021 09:26

@Sweetpea1532

You lot are too speedy for me to keep up! *@SleepingStandingUp* *@Butwasitherdriveway* I must say your fact checking is slipping a wee bit...have you not noticed that a pp has said that *@TakesTheCake* s DC shouldn't be chalking the pavement.. As those of us who have RTFT know that OP specifically mentioned there was NO PAVEMENT to be chalked! I do realise that the pp could have been thinking in general terms , not about OPs DC. I suppose that's why I've not been appointed fact checker for mumsnet as I'm a bit weak in accurately deciphering the meaning behind the written word.

@RogueMNerKnowsNoShame
Whatever are you going on about, hun? What does apologist have to do with anythingWink

@theleafandnotthetree...
Love your post about the Queen!
And if I may ask, why are you so late to this party? Where ever have you been? I must say, though, your contribution is stellarGrin

@FixItUpChappie
You get a few points for your humourous comments..keep them coming...I can see excellent potential in your input about DC and chalking, and unreasonable people in this difficult pandemic debacle.
@TruJay
Lol! Thanks for putting things in perspective for us about what some modern DC are up to instead of happily chalking with their younger siblings.

Bloody work.

Keeping me from my valuable input on this thread.

SleepingStandingUp · 31/03/2021 09:27

So busy for 18 hours she couldn't chuck a bit of water over chalk? Doing what? And yet not so busy that she couldn't stop thinking about the chalking of a few rambunctious kiddies, so consumed was she that it had to be scrubbed from the Earth's face before she could carry out any other duties.

Yo @TakesTheCake the kids weren't drawing runes and pentagrams around these monster, birds and self portraits were they?

Butwasitherdriveway · 31/03/2021 09:40

Shocked 😂😂😂😂😂😂

TruJay · 31/03/2021 11:02

@Sweetpea1532 It was 20+ years ago and I didn’t live in the nicest place (obviously 🤣) hopefully most children these days don’t do these things.

Imagine living such a calm, sheltered life to be shocked by chalk drawings. I mean if they were drawing using the blood of their enemies then I would agree to wash it away but a bit of chalk, not really something to get worked up about.

If it did ‘offend’ you then surely the neighbourly thing to do would be to pop round that evening and say they weren’t keen and could you please keep it on your own driveway. I mean, I wouldn’t apologise and would be quite surprised at their stance but to passive aggressively stand there and scrub it off, I’d have honestly just laughed at her.

@SleepingStandingUp GrinGrinGrin

SleepingStandingUp · 31/03/2021 11:26

It was 20+ years ago you realise those kids are now parents now 🤣

If they were drawing using the blood of their enemies then I would agree to wash it away what??? Then how do the enemies know not to invade? I get you're all for letting the aliens go back home and rehabilitating demons too.

jessstan2 · 31/03/2021 11:41

Sleeping: Would you really be so offended if this had happened in the Summer of 2019.
....
I wouldn't be offended but would not live somewhere like that. Pavements are for people walking to and from a destination, roads are for cars, buses, bicycles or crossing to get to the other side. Parks and gardens are for playing outside.

Bella43 · 31/03/2021 11:47

I think it's fine. I loved doing this as a child. The rain will wash it away eventually so I can't see what the problem is. If it were me, I'd just tell my children not to chalk her drive in future to avoid any further awkwardness. Shame really though. Kids will be kids an all.

TheKeatingFive · 31/03/2021 11:53

I wouldn't be offended but would not live somewhere like that. Pavements are for people walking to and from a destination, roads are for cars, buses, bicycles or crossing to get to the other side. Parks and gardens are for playing outside.

You sound ... rigid

Where I am, kids play on quiet pavements all the time.

tangerinelollipop · 31/03/2021 11:59

Pavements are for people walking to and from a destination, roads are for cars, buses, bicycles or crossing to get to the other side

Yes, please. And communal and public places need to be kept clean and free from drawings Confused

theleafandnotthetree · 31/03/2021 12:03

@jessstan2

Sleeping: Would you really be so offended if this had happened in the Summer of 2019. .... I wouldn't be offended but would not live somewhere like that. Pavements are for people walking to and from a destination, roads are for cars, buses, bicycles or crossing to get to the other side. Parks and gardens are for playing outside.
Wow, you would really HATE this article then www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/cities/2019/may/21/how-can-we-get-our-children-playing-outside-again and the things the people in it are trying to achieve in encouraging children to reclaim space and play out. Me, I see it only as a return to sanity.
HandyHarry · 31/03/2021 12:04

@jessstan2 what would you do if children moved in next door and chalked on the pavement?

I think we've ascertained that naice children chalk as well!

Would you move?

Expensive business to keep moving!

theleafandnotthetree · 31/03/2021 12:05

@tangerinelollipop

Pavements are for people walking to and from a destination, roads are for cars, buses, bicycles or crossing to get to the other side

Yes, please. And communal and public places need to be kept clean and free from drawings Confused

My God there are some joyless fuckers on this thread! And I consider myself a strict parent who is forever reminding my children not to impose themselves on other people.
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