AIBU to let my children chalk on the road? Neighbour washed it all away.

[TakesTheCake]

We have lived on a small square for four years, where the neighbours are pretty unfriendly and insular (unlike our old street, where they were all lovely and welcoming and mutual support abounded :-( ), and two doors away lives a couple who have always been reasonably friendly and cordial.

Today my two boys aged 7 and 12 were outside playing for a few hours on the square with the boy from next door - riding scooters, running, swinging on the swing in the little grassed area, with me and the boy’s dad keeping watch. My elder boy ran in to get the chalks they sometimes use to draw on our driveway but this time they all drew on the road (there is no pavement, just driveways and road). It covered outside our house and also the neighbours’ house (the couple we are somewhat friendly with). They were really proud of their creativity, finished up, then came in for lunch. Five minutes later the neighbour came out of her house, ran the hose on her driveway and worked pretty hard at scrubbing/washing it all away.

The kids were dismayed when they saw her doing it, and thought they had done something wrong. It felt really horrible for me too, as I don’t think kids’ chalk drawings are out of order in any way, and will wash away in the next rain. They have never caused any issues in the road, so it can’t be because of built-up resentments that spilled over, and they have literally never drawn on the road in the whole four years we have lived there.

She saw me see her doing it, and it feels really awkward now. I would rather she had come over and just straightforwardly said it bothers her to see it from her window and could I make sure it isn’t outside her house again. Washing it away felt passive aggressive, or she really feels I let them do something out of order and wrong.

AIBU to have let them? Are children’s chalk drawings on the road (NOT her driveway or even close) not OK?

@jessstan2

I must admit I would not like to live somewhere in which children played on the street, never mind chalking the pavement or road. I have seen it on television, for example on 'Call the Midwife', but these were poor children living in a deprived area who had nowhere to play outside.

I expect the neighbour wants to keep the street clean and pleasant - imagine if a prospective buyer turned up and saw that. However she could have been a bit tactful and washed it off later on.

It has been difficult for children during lockdown so I would cut them a bit of slack at the moment, as long as they know not to do it when things are back to 'normal'.

Jess,

You have no idea of OP or her circumstances and are out of line.

@jellybellybanana

t’s not important to me that the drawings stay. I was upset because it left a nasty taste in our mouths after all their joy, they kept thinking they had done something wrong, and now there’s uncertainty and awkwardness with one of the only previously decent neighbours

That's just you creating a fuss where there didn't need to be any. You messed up, you created a bad atmosphere...you could have said "Isn't that nice of X to clean the road up after you had finished all your fun!",
Stop being so bloody dramatic about nothing.

🙄🙄

I can’t believe some of the comments.

YANBU and it would bring me real joy to see your kids, especially older ones, chalking outside.

YANBU and it would bring me real joy to see your kids, especially older ones, chalking outside

That's pretty weird.

I can't believe people on here think it's not OK to chalk on 'land outside your house'. What fucking miseries you are.

Do you think it's a problem for kids to skip up and down the pavement to? How about learning to ride a bike on the pavement? I guess you're part of the mob who put up 'NO BALL GAMES' signs on grass fields too.

God help us.

My kids chalk on the road (odd street layout which means cars come by rarely). One neighbour occasionally comes out, puts his hands on his hips and makes exaggerated harrumphing noises.

I cheerily ignore him.

I love seeing kids chalking. It's creative, they're outside, they're amusing themselves - all things I think should be encouraged.

@Rukaya

YANBU and it would bring me real joy to see your kids, especially older ones, chalking outside

That's pretty weird.

Why is that weird? Watching kids kid get creative is fun! Not quite as much as fun as chalking the roads, but I have my knees to consider

@Rukaya

YANBU and it would bring me real joy to see your kids, especially older ones, chalking outside

That's pretty weird.

Why? I'm sure she doesn't mean oooh yeah I'd like to stare at your children whilst they play because I want to look at your children. She just means she'd happily see kids this age innocently playing

@Rukaya

YANBU and it would bring me real joy to see your kids, especially older ones, chalking outside

That's pretty weird.

People in pandemic in liking to see people having fun shocker

We have to make allowances for everyone, including children, when they in lockdown.

I think we also have to make allowances for the hosing neighbour who wants everything in her road to be ship shape and respectable. She probably feels there is no reason for standards to slip.

Standards?

I think the 1950s have joined us!

How very odd and unfriendly. Understand that chalk drawings get washed away, but I would have thought a few children's drawings would have been a useful addition to brighten up a road? I would ignore, but explain to your DC that some people can be a bit grumpy...

Sad to read how unhappy people are to see kids, outside playing in the sunshine getting fresh air, happily drawing on the pavement & road. The chalk washes away fgs!

My children used to chalk all over the pavement. I wasn’t too keen but no one complained and it kept them quiet

@CuriousaboutSamphire

Standards?

I think the 1950s have joined us!

I would have thought playing in the street was more prevalent back in the 1950s in some areas than now. I've never lived anywhere that it is done, I didn't and certainly my mother wouldn't have allowed it anyway. We used to go to the park or play in the back garden.

However (I said this before), lockdown has been hard on kids and we have to make allowances for them.

@NurseButtercup

Sad to read how unhappy people are to see kids, outside playing in the sunshine getting fresh air, happily drawing on the pavement & road. The chalk washes away fgs!

Me too, my mind is well & truly boggled. Clearly children should be neither seen or heard these days.

It’s chalk FGS! It washes away very easily in the rain. They weren’t doing it on her property. They weren’t doodling cocks and swear words.

I’d much rather my kids were out playing in the fresh air than sat inside on their consoles so they didn’t dare accidentally offend anyone . They’ve been cooped up in the house in isolation for a year, give them a break.

And frankly, if I was a prospective buyer and drove into the road I’d be really pleased to see a bright and cheerful chalk drawing and seeing children playing out nicely together.

Some people are just utter miseries.

I think you missed the point there @jessstan2

But you keep on repeating the children should neither be seen or heard mantra! Kids ---> thataway, faraway!

I think primary aged children drawing on the street with chalk is cute. Secondary children, not so much. Can't imagine my 13 yrs old doing it, it's too weird.

@jessstan2

We have to make allowances for everyone, including children, when they in lockdown.

I think we also have to make allowances for the hosing neighbour who wants everything in her road to be ship shape and respectable. She probably feels there is no reason for standards to slip.

I'd love to see the roads where you live, these ship shape and perfect roads.

Personally I wouldn't have washed it off too lazy but it was a public area so things like that happen. Thats life!

Get the kids to stick to your own drive if you wantnto preserve it until ot rains!!

@catsandchaos

👍🤣

Poor kids these days cannot do anything without people complaining about them.

It's such a simple harmless thing to do. I wouldn't make the children stop

OP, was it on her driveway?

*I must admit I would not like to live somewhere in which children played on the street, never mind chalking the pavement or road. I have seen it on television, for example on 'Call the Midwife', but these were poor children living in a deprived area who had nowhere to play outside.

I expect the neighbour wants to keep the street clean and pleasant - imagine if a prospective buyer turned up and saw that.*

If I was a prospective buyer I’d probably think how lovely that it is safe enough round here that the kids can play out in the street and have fun! It’s exactly the type of environment I’d want my children to grow up in. You must live a very sheltered life if you think kids only play in the street on TV programmes